Lack of listening, lack of organisation and I dont like your breathing!

[MonSqueek]

Listen to the options on the IVR

Oh god... why why why is it so hard to listen to the options presented to you on the IVR??? (press 1 for this 2 for that)

When you hit "Sales" and come through to me with a service enquiry I get secretly upset. (It messes with my sales conversion stats) Failing to select the correct call que is my first clue that you’re an idiot and can’t listen to some simple instructions.

Caller (comes thorough to the "take out a new policy” line)
Caller: I want to pay for my existing policy
Me: No problems (silently gritted teeth)

*takes and confirms policy details*

Me: Will you be using a Master card or Visa?
Caller: A credit card.
Me: *rolls eyes and sets up payment screen, confirms payment amount*
Caller: I don’t know how to make a payment over the phone; I’ve never done it before.
Me: (sweet as pie) its ok I'll talk you through it step by step, its not rocket science I promise.

*talks caller painfully through step by step on where to find card number and expiry date and she reads it to me in random clusters of numbers instead of 4 lots of 4 digits*

I knew you were going to ask that!!!

Me: Do you have any existing business with us?
Caller: Yes, I have membership, a few cars *blah blah blah*

Me: Can I have your member number please?
Caller: I knew you were going to ask me that!!!!
*furious ruffling of papers*
Just let me grab it….

*so why didn’t you have it ready?!?*

Ok process transaction,

And the pearler… he reads me a credit card that expires 03/06!
WTF dude?!?


Are you exasperated?

*usual greeting, establish customer needs* IMO so far so good, nothing out of the ordinary... then this from left field *

Caller: Do you even want to be doing this?? You sound unhappy.

M: Oh, no it’s fine, no problem. (Making a conscious effort to sound “happier”) What’s the address of the property you need insured?

Caller: No, Do you WANT to be doing this, you sound exasperated already!

Me: I apologise I didn’t mean to sound that way, Im happy to be helping you. What is the address of the property you need insured?

Caller: Do you even want to do this, maybe I should call someone who does
Me: I’ve taken your call, I am happy to process your transaction, (moving on to be even “happier” sounding) What is the address of the property you need insured?

Caller: You sound like you don’t even want to talk to me

Me: Im happy to help you, but you need to give me the information - any other consultant will need to ask you the same questions. What would you like me to help you with?

Caller: Get me someone else.

Me: No worries I can do that. Just hold the line (in the sickly sweetest fake happiest/sarcastically happy tone I could muster.)

Caller: Whats your name?!

Me: MonSqueek. *hits hold button before she could retort*

Checked with a manager if they wanted the call right away or if I should give it to another consultant. Transferred call to another consultant.

Other consultant said she was a bitch. She complained to other consultant that she “didn’t like my breathing”, I had a "bad attitude" and I “sounded bored” and she is in business you know?!

Damn, maybe I need to learn to hold my breath for the duration of her call?

[Snowbird]

Other consultant said she was a bitch. She complained to other consultant that she “didn’t like my breathing”, I had a "bad attitude" and I “sounded bored” and she is in business you know?!

Damn, maybe I need to learn to hold my breath for the duration of her call?

*deep breathing* "The suckiness is strong with this one."

[Chanlin]

[Devils Advocate] Mayb, just maybe, shes picking up on the fake happiness and some unconcious sighing or the like [/devils advocate] and maybe just maybe she was a complete loony bit*h. But who knows.

I get that every once in awhile and I tell you its bloody annoying.

[LifeCarnie]

*talks caller painfully through step by step on where to find card number and expiry date and she reads it to me in random clusters of numbers instead of 4 lots of 4 digits*

People reciting numbers are fun.

People do this with phone numbers too. WTF? In the states, phone numbers are 3 digits, 3 digits, 4 digits. Most people will recite their number that way, those that don't confuse me, since it's something that they even teach in school at a very early age.

=========================

Have you ever noticed the faster that someone recites a number to you is directly inverse to the speed at which they can handle having numbers recited back to them?

=========================

I had someone call the other day and give me an item number of "forty-five hundred".

OK....

Forty-five hundred = 4500. Right?

Not in this persons reality. They meant 40500. Which is pronounced forty thousand, five hundred.


Which brings up another problem. People are getting lazier and lazier about offering information in a proper format.

Ask someone for a number and sometimes the reply is something like "A hundred and twenty three, four, five". When they mean 1,2,3,4, 5.

I don't know why the proper recitation of numbers is such a burden for some customers.

[princess4life]

Listen to the options on the IVR

Oh god... why why why is it so hard to listen to the options presented to you on the IVR??? (press 1 for this 2 for that)

When you hit "Sales" and come through to me with a service enquiry I get secretly upset. (It messes with my sales conversion stats) Failing to select the correct call que is my first clue that you’re an idiot and can’t listen to some simple instructions.

I deal with that all the time and the worse part is people have an option of going straight to an operator and they will get you to the correct area, but I still get callers that say they where transfered from the operator to me and I am not the correct person

Other consultant said she was a bitch. She complained to other consultant that she “didn’t like my breathing”, I had a "bad attitude" and I “sounded bored” and she is in business you know?!

Damn, maybe I need to learn to hold my breath for the duration of her call?

I had a caller once that demanded to speak to another agent as soon as I answered the phone because she didn't like the pitch of my voice when I said my greeting she said it was very gratting and got on her last nerve

People reciting numbers are fun.

People do this with phone numbers too. WTF? In the states, phone numbers are 3 digits, 3 digits, 4 digits. Most people will recite their number that way, those that don't confuse me, since it's something that they even teach in school at a very early age. ?

I hate it when people rattle off the phone number and put the area code last such as 456-7891 area code 123

=========================

Have you ever noticed the faster that someone recites a number to you is directly inverse to the speed at which they can handle having numbers recited back to them?

=========================

I have noticed this as well, when you recite the number back to them they either tell you no that wrong and then proceed to tell you the same numbers over again or ask you to repeat that number slower.

I also have an issue when I am giving out part number people like to move the dash to different areas such as I say "Part number ABC-1234-XYZ" they repeat "AB-C12-4X-YZ"

[Saydrah]

I have a voice that kinda sounds like I have a cold all the time, and occasionally when I worked retail I got people on the phone either getting upset at me because I was working while I was sick, or doing the oh-poor-dear-you-sound-ill! thing...

People should really learn not to judge an audiobook by its cover.

[princess4life]

I also have a co-worker that talks a little slow, she has had people accuse her of being drunk at work. She says she wishes she worked face to face with customers so they could see her eyes and know she is not drunk

[MonSqueek]

hahahaha, thanks for making feel better about my week :-) I love this site.

Im sorry my writing style isnt as good as some of you guys but Im glad that you understood my post !

[PepperElf]

“didn’t like my breathing”

heh i can just see the reply to that

"I'm sorry ma'am. We'll try to restrict her from breathing in the future. Is there anything else we can do for you?"

I had a caller once that demanded to speak to another agent as soon as I answered the phone because she didn't like the pitch of my voice when I said my greeting she said it was very gratting and got on her last nerve

well i do admit one guy we deal with where i work... omg yes he does have an annoying voice (just about everyone agrees). but we have to deal with him anyway.

[jb17kx]

I've noted as well with phone numbers that I can't handle them near as well as normal when they're broken up from the usual 2-4-4 format. I suppose we become conditioned...

EDIT: Should note that Australian phone numbers are 2 digit area code, followed by 8 digits rendered in 2 groups of 4.

[Reyneth]

People should really learn not to judge an audiobook by its cover.

I love it.

[PepperElf]

lol they're weird in japan. it's either a 6 digit i think, for land lines xx-xxxx or 11 digit for cell phones xxx-xxxx-xxxx (yeah there are more cells than land lines heh)

[Dreamstalker]

Ask someone for a number and sometimes the reply is something like "A hundred and twenty three, four, five". When they mean 1,2,3,4, 5.

Oy. My dad does that sometimes. I know what he means, but it still drives me up a wall. In person yes, the other party can figure it out, but over the phone? More likely to get it wrong than right.

[rerant]

I also have a co-worker that talks a little slow, she has had people accuse her of being drunk at work. She says she wishes she worked face to face with customers so they could see her eyes and know she is not drunk

I have the opposite problem. People are always complaining that I talk too fast and to slow down when I speak, which usually results in me... talking... like.... this... because.... my.... normal... speed... is all.... that... feels... normal... to me. Then they complain that I'm talking to them like they're stupid.
Well pardon me if your ears can't keep up with my mouth.

[Broomjockey]

I had a substitute teacher once who was a friend of the family, leading to my knowledge that she had a condition that always made her sound like she was on the verge of tears. When she taught one of my classes some students made some quiet but snide jokes about it. I was more than happy to set them straight. Some people just don't have control over how they sound.