Pervy Customers

[lobsterdance]

Hello! Not working at the minute but i've got lots of stories saved up from my summer jobs. This one was the worst.
Background: worked in a newsagent and i'd get lots of regulars, most of them old, buying papers every day. Up until this point this man had been like any other customer. I'd say he was atleast 70 and he'd commented on my 'pretty smile' a couple of times but i got that quite a bit (it's cause of the dimples)

SC- creepy old guy
Me -

Me (making random conversation): It's very hot today
SC: Oh it's lovely
Me: just wish there weren't so many midgies. I've been bitten all over.
SC: I wish i was a midgie. Harw, harw!
Me: *completely ignoring that comment* Ok thats £3.10
SC: I SAID 'i wish i was a midgie'
Me: *fakes smile* that's nice

:shivers: eeewwww!!!

[RecoveringKinkoid]

SC: I wish i was a midgie. Harw, harw!
Me: *completely ignoring that comment* Ok thats £3.10
SC: I SAID 'i wish i was a midgie'
Me (icy deadpan): And I was charitable enough to allow you to pretend you didn't.

I've said this sort of thing to people. Really shuts them the hell up.

[Parrothead]

Ick.

And to customerssuck!

[bainsidhe]

What's a midgie

[edible_hat]

What's a midgie

Same thing as a mosquito or a gnat (I think)

[scruff]

What's a midgie

small biting insect. a minor irritation.

[edible_hat]

small biting insect. a minor irritation.

Great definition of an SC, but what's a midgie?

[ShinyGreenApple]

Shame you didn't have a can of Off! or something like that to spritz threateningly at that statement.

[Cyphr]

do this: if thats the case :applies 8 times the recommended amount on every inch of body covered or not: what kind of pickup line is "I wish i was a midge."?

[Hotfoot]

Not exactly the same, but still weird as hell...

"Mr. Hotfoot, are you married?"
"I don't see how that's going to help you solve 25% of 57."
"Do you have a girlfriend?"
You could at least come up with a lame math-related joke kid, come ON. Originality, I've gotten these questions so many times it's not funny. "Oh, are you done?"
"No..."
"Well since you're not doing anything related to class, I assume you must be done and you're ready for me to grade these now."

"I'm working now Mr. Hotfoot."
I thought you might.

Seriously, could someone explain this to me? Why do kids ask that? Aside from "How long did it take you to grow your hair?", it's the single most asked question in classrooms it seems.



Oh, and the single most hated question?

"Mr. Hotfoot, why do you have a mullet?"



Kid, I spare your life only because you don't know hair, and so I must educate you, even though you're supposed to be learning division. A mullet is short in the front and long in the back. My hair is not short in the front, it is PULLED BACK INTO MY PONYTAIL. I'd tell you to watch MacGuyver or Captain Planet and the Planeteers, except that you weren't even born when the re-runs went off the air.

Grumble grumble...freaking called my glorious mane a MULLET.

[XCashier]

SC: I wish i was a midgie. Harw, harw!

"Dunno about a midgie, but you're definitely a louse."

SC: I SAID 'i wish i was a midgie'
Me (icy deadpan): And I was charitable enough to allow you to pretend you didn't.

Brilliant smackdown!

[edible_hat]

Seriously, could someone explain this to me? Why do kids ask that? Aside from "How long did it take you to grow your hair?", it's the single most asked question in classrooms it seems.

heh, a friend of mine is a teacher. Because of the t-shirts he wears, he gets asked if "My Laundry Shirt" means all his other clothes are dirty and why Japanese people think he's famous.

[TruthHurts]

SC: I wish I was a midgie hawr hawr
Me: I wish I would win the lottery and never have to deal with perverts like you again hawr hawr. Have a nice day

Of course I that last part would've been said silently so I don't get a customer complaint.