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The most wonderful time of the year...?
Longtime reader, old-school poster (circa late 90s/early 00's or so):
I work at a company that is outsourced from a coutry in Asia (I work in the US). It's the reverse of the typical US-to-anywhere-else outsourcing conundrum. We do warranty service for, among other things, artificial pre-lit Christmas trees. These are trees that come pre-strung with lights. Sometimes the lights have problems; sometimes there are defects in the production of a tree; this is where my company comes in and provides troubleshooting or replacement parts under warranty.
It should be mentioned that while we sometimes replace missing parts when we can (especially for new products), it is not a warranty issue, and this is stated on a card packaged in the box. Missing parts are very rare, and are usually limited to small parts such as a spare part kit. Often times the store would neglect to give the customers one of the boxes in which the product was packaged, or they would accept incomplete returns and resell them. This particular product was a year old, and we could only replace defective parts for it. We had to advise any people with missing parts to return to the retailer as we had an agreement with them that they would handle it; most people had no problem with this. Key word: MOST.
Here's one of my favorite email correspondences from last year. It starts out innocently enough...
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!
I purchased a Christmas Tree from Store X after Christmas last year. It is a 9ft Tree Y. The box was missing the very top of the tree and the stand. I spoke with Store X they told me to bring it back and they would refund my money. I worked on the tree last night for 1.5 hours and I do NOT want to take it all apart to return it. I am hoping that you will be able to send me the missing parts.
Please advise.
Sincerely, Idiot
__________________________________________________ ________________
>>>>Now, I'm thinking: If you noticed two large parts were MISSING, why did you work on it? Hell, without the tree stand, HOW did you work on it? Why didn't you return it? Store X said they'd accept it... Is there something I'm missing?<<<<
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
Unfortunately, the only thing that we can suggest you do is return the tree to the store for the refund, since Store X has agreed to assist you. We are only an outsourced warranty company that replaces defective parts; missing parts are unfortunately not covered under our warranty. Sorry that we cannot be of further assistance.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
Taking the tree back is not an option for me. If you are just the outsource warranty company...please provide me with the contact information for the company direct. Your telephone number is the only number on the box. Please provide me the customer service telephone number or email.
Thank you in advance.
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
The manufacturer is based in Asia and only deals directly with retailers; they do not deal with or sell to consumers. You can visit their website, www.MANUFACTURER'sWEBSITE.com, but they will probably be unable to assist you. Unfortunately, taking the tree back to the store from which you purchased it is the only option available since we cannot replace the parts.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
Can I buy the top from you?
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
Since we do not have a seller's permit, we cannot sell any parts.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
In working with only retailers...Can Store X request another tree instead of the refund? I really want this tree and this process is making it very difficult for me to do that. I can't believe that the company wouldn't want me to keep the tree. Please advise.
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
While we would like for you to keep the tree, there isn't anything we can do since this isn't a warranty issue. You can see if Store X has any trees left, but we have no knowledge of their stock, and we cannot speak for them. Perhaps they could contact other Store X's in the area to inquire about their stock, too; you would have to take that up with them. Since we are the outsourced warranty company for the consumers, not the retailers, we would be unable to send them any replacements.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
>>>>Now, I thought that I had explained everything. She asked some valid and common questions, and I answered them all as well as I could. We cannot sell anything; we are not the manufacturer, we are not a retailer, and manufacturer's defects, not missing parts, are covered under warranty. I could understand her distress, although her inability to accept "No" as an answer and her half-assed attempt to catch me in some sort of twisted moronic logic loop was beginning to baffle me. And then, this:<<<<
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
This is the worst! You could send me a new part but can't replace a missing one from the same company. I'm just sorry that you have absolutely NO power to care for the customer, not even to pass me on to someone who does! You are worthless! Tell a customer there is nothing you can do is unacceptable. IF YOU can't do anything there is always another avenue for the customer to take - you're just uninformed or lacking training. Keep doing what you're doing Goutroy, you are truly an asset to your company.
I don't want the tree and will never buy any products from this huckle-buck outfit again. Good luck. Taking care of customers like this - you won't be outsourcing for long but I guess if I were only making minimum wage, I wouldn't give a crape either!
Hope the rest of your day sucks!
__________________________________________________ _______________
>>>>And my smartass reply, courtesy of the copy/paste command:<<<<
__________________________________________________ _______________
Dear Idiot,
Unfortunately, the only thing that we can suggest you do is return the tree to the store for the refund, since Store X has agreed to assist you. We are only an outsourced warranty company that replaces defective parts; missing parts are unfortunately not covered under our warranty. The manufacturer is based in Asia and only deals directly with retailers; they do not deal with or sell to consumers. You can visit their website, www.MANUFACTURER's WEBSITE.com, but they will most likely be unable to assist you. Unfortunately, taking the tree back to the store you purchased it from is the only option available since we cannot replace the parts. Since we do not have a seller's permit, we cannot sell any parts. While we would like for you to keep the tree, there isn't anything we can do since this isn't a warranty issue. You can see if Store X has any extra trees in stock, but we have no knowledge of their stock, and we cannot speak for them. Since we are the outsourced warranty company for the consumers, not the retailers, we would be unable to send them any replacements.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ _______________
She, uh... didn't reply to that.
I work at a company that is outsourced from a coutry in Asia (I work in the US). It's the reverse of the typical US-to-anywhere-else outsourcing conundrum. We do warranty service for, among other things, artificial pre-lit Christmas trees. These are trees that come pre-strung with lights. Sometimes the lights have problems; sometimes there are defects in the production of a tree; this is where my company comes in and provides troubleshooting or replacement parts under warranty.
It should be mentioned that while we sometimes replace missing parts when we can (especially for new products), it is not a warranty issue, and this is stated on a card packaged in the box. Missing parts are very rare, and are usually limited to small parts such as a spare part kit. Often times the store would neglect to give the customers one of the boxes in which the product was packaged, or they would accept incomplete returns and resell them. This particular product was a year old, and we could only replace defective parts for it. We had to advise any people with missing parts to return to the retailer as we had an agreement with them that they would handle it; most people had no problem with this. Key word: MOST.
Here's one of my favorite email correspondences from last year. It starts out innocently enough...
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
PLEASE HELP ME!!!!!!
I purchased a Christmas Tree from Store X after Christmas last year. It is a 9ft Tree Y. The box was missing the very top of the tree and the stand. I spoke with Store X they told me to bring it back and they would refund my money. I worked on the tree last night for 1.5 hours and I do NOT want to take it all apart to return it. I am hoping that you will be able to send me the missing parts.
Please advise.
Sincerely, Idiot
__________________________________________________ ________________
>>>>Now, I'm thinking: If you noticed two large parts were MISSING, why did you work on it? Hell, without the tree stand, HOW did you work on it? Why didn't you return it? Store X said they'd accept it... Is there something I'm missing?<<<<
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
Unfortunately, the only thing that we can suggest you do is return the tree to the store for the refund, since Store X has agreed to assist you. We are only an outsourced warranty company that replaces defective parts; missing parts are unfortunately not covered under our warranty. Sorry that we cannot be of further assistance.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
Taking the tree back is not an option for me. If you are just the outsource warranty company...please provide me with the contact information for the company direct. Your telephone number is the only number on the box. Please provide me the customer service telephone number or email.
Thank you in advance.
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
The manufacturer is based in Asia and only deals directly with retailers; they do not deal with or sell to consumers. You can visit their website, www.MANUFACTURER'sWEBSITE.com, but they will probably be unable to assist you. Unfortunately, taking the tree back to the store from which you purchased it is the only option available since we cannot replace the parts.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
Can I buy the top from you?
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
Since we do not have a seller's permit, we cannot sell any parts.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
In working with only retailers...Can Store X request another tree instead of the refund? I really want this tree and this process is making it very difficult for me to do that. I can't believe that the company wouldn't want me to keep the tree. Please advise.
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Idiot,
While we would like for you to keep the tree, there isn't anything we can do since this isn't a warranty issue. You can see if Store X has any trees left, but we have no knowledge of their stock, and we cannot speak for them. Perhaps they could contact other Store X's in the area to inquire about their stock, too; you would have to take that up with them. Since we are the outsourced warranty company for the consumers, not the retailers, we would be unable to send them any replacements.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ ________________
>>>>Now, I thought that I had explained everything. She asked some valid and common questions, and I answered them all as well as I could. We cannot sell anything; we are not the manufacturer, we are not a retailer, and manufacturer's defects, not missing parts, are covered under warranty. I could understand her distress, although her inability to accept "No" as an answer and her half-assed attempt to catch me in some sort of twisted moronic logic loop was beginning to baffle me. And then, this:<<<<
__________________________________________________ ________________
Dear Goutroy,
This is the worst! You could send me a new part but can't replace a missing one from the same company. I'm just sorry that you have absolutely NO power to care for the customer, not even to pass me on to someone who does! You are worthless! Tell a customer there is nothing you can do is unacceptable. IF YOU can't do anything there is always another avenue for the customer to take - you're just uninformed or lacking training. Keep doing what you're doing Goutroy, you are truly an asset to your company.
I don't want the tree and will never buy any products from this huckle-buck outfit again. Good luck. Taking care of customers like this - you won't be outsourcing for long but I guess if I were only making minimum wage, I wouldn't give a crape either!
Hope the rest of your day sucks!
__________________________________________________ _______________
>>>>And my smartass reply, courtesy of the copy/paste command:<<<<
__________________________________________________ _______________
Dear Idiot,
Unfortunately, the only thing that we can suggest you do is return the tree to the store for the refund, since Store X has agreed to assist you. We are only an outsourced warranty company that replaces defective parts; missing parts are unfortunately not covered under our warranty. The manufacturer is based in Asia and only deals directly with retailers; they do not deal with or sell to consumers. You can visit their website, www.MANUFACTURER's WEBSITE.com, but they will most likely be unable to assist you. Unfortunately, taking the tree back to the store you purchased it from is the only option available since we cannot replace the parts. Since we do not have a seller's permit, we cannot sell any parts. While we would like for you to keep the tree, there isn't anything we can do since this isn't a warranty issue. You can see if Store X has any extra trees in stock, but we have no knowledge of their stock, and we cannot speak for them. Since we are the outsourced warranty company for the consumers, not the retailers, we would be unable to send them any replacements.
Thank you,
Goutroy
__________________________________________________ _______________
She, uh... didn't reply to that.
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