Kids these days! (kinda long)

[wagegoth]

It's also behavior that crops up among girls with absent fathers. If the parents were divorced or never married, and a girl's father was one of those who never made time, she'll try to get male attention in the quickest way possible. And the most obvious clue is that she is looking for attention from an older man specifically.

[blas]

Wagegoth hit the nail on the head on that one. Girls with no father or positive male adult influence generally end up being very promiscuous and almost always end up with much older men.

Can we say Anna Nicole?

[Andara Bledin]

Sadly, I actually dated her before it all started happening. But, it was weird. I never got that vibe from her. We went out for smoothies and to dinner/movies, but she never came on to me. I missed a golden opportunity!!

I've been around a few of those types. If she dated you, then you weren't on the menu for sex favors. They tend to fool around with people they aren't interested in or attracted to, but anyone that might be potential mate material doesn't get any favors until the engagement has been announced, at least.

The absent father figure is another issue. As is a promiscuous mother during formative years. Little kids are info sponges. If you've got a stream of men traipsing through your bedroom, don't be surprised if your little princess turns into a teenage strumpet.

^-.-^

[Jbball]

I've been around a few of those types. If she dated you, then you weren't on the menu for sex favors. They tend to fool around with people they aren't interested in or attracted to, but anyone that might be potential mate material doesn't get any favors until the engagement has been announced, at least.

The absent father figure is another issue. As is a promiscuous mother during formative years. Little kids are info sponges. If you've got a stream of men traipsing through your bedroom, don't be surprised if your little princess turns into a teenage strumpet.

^-.-^

True, though, I wasn't really at my sexual prime at that time. So, she technically could've been coming on to me and I wouldn't have seen it. Also, I never made a move on her, as I was shy at that time in my life. Oh well.

[ArenaBoy]

You know, they say age doesn't matter but holy polka dancin' crap that is just WRONG and that just screams statutory on the older guys mentioned in Foxglove's post.

[karma_gypsy]

You know, they say age doesn't matter but holy polka dancin' crap that is just WRONG and that just screams statutory on the older guys mentioned in Foxglove's post.

Yeah. And who wants to bet that the mom is just going to continue to allow this behavior? Plus, the girl would have done that anywhere. A movie theater, fast food place, park, heck, even one of those family fun places....

That young lady (as well as several others) are just in a downward spiral of destruction and creating a bad name for their family and themselves as well.

A friend that I had in High School (also sexually active), I believe 9th grade, told me of a story of her mom was once pregnant when she was 9 - but lost the child.


As for the age difference, there's an 11 year different between me and my husband. But we got together when I was 18, five years later, we're still happily married.

[retaildrone]

14? good lord.

This reinforces my plan with my daughter. I am going to put her in a chasity belt, lock her in the closet and shoot anything with a penis that tries to enter the yard.

[Peppergirl]

Nearly every promiscuous girl I knew in high school was a product of an absent/abusive father or of some sort of latent sexual abuse. And hell, this was back in the 80's, so I'm sure it's alot more prevalent today.

That so-called mother needs to have her ass kicked. Literally. And I'd volunteer for the job if I knew who she was.

[Andara Bledin]

Don't forget that some of these promiscuous teens are products of overly restrictive parents, too.

Some people, if too restrained, have no idea of how to control themselves once they get a smidge of freedom. Or will go completely gonzo as some sort of expression of protest.

The bosslady at work has a hyper-religious control-freak sister, so she made it a point to be friends with all of the sister's kids so when the impending fallout happened, she'd be there to give them someplace to go. The most well-adjusted of the brood actually works at our company, and he settled for body mod as his form of rebellion. His siblings, however, include one missing runnaway, and a couple more who are massive druggies.

^-.-^

[lightmylamb]

Most of the posts here are about how this young girl has father issues, but I've known many girls with awesome dads who've turned out this way. They had a good childhood, their siblings turned out okay, but they became a total skank, although they were usually still very nice to be around. I only really know of one who's a little crazy, but most of them, other than sleeping around, are very well adjusted.

[smileyeagle1021]

the mother blamed you...when she obviously failed to raise her daughter to respect herself. Good God, 14? Has anyone else noticed a trend of every year, hearing about younger and younger kids having sex? I swear I've heard of 5th and 6th graders...where are the adults, and why are they not taking responsibilty for things they should be talking to their kids about?

OMG, I know exactly what you are talking about... when I was still in high school my shift leader at carl's jr was telling me about how he was upset because his brother lost his virginity younger than he had... while I never asked his brother's age, I did see the kid a few times and there is no way he could be over 10
I'll be honest, my first thought was"omg, i didn't realize he was even old enough to keep it up" ... and at that time my brain to mouth filter was not very good so sadly my first verbal response was pretty much the same thing

[Foxglove8778]

You know, they say age doesn't matter but holy polka dancin' crap that is just WRONG and that just screams statutory on the older guys mentioned in Foxglove's post.

That was pointed out to those "gentlemen" when they dropped by the booth looking for her the next day.... it was also pointed out to them that faire employees don't have to peace tie their weapons. Read that as "stay away from the little girl that doesn't know any better or face the prospect of becoming a eunuch". She wasn't happy that we were looking out for her like that, but maybe she'll look back and learn something from it.

Also note that her biological father is/was a police officer and very controlling.


Age differences really don't matter so much after a point when both parties are adults and know themselves well enough to be equal partners in a relationship, IMHO.

[Kyree]

Wagegoth hit the nail on the head on that one. Girls with no father or positive male adult influence generally end up being very promiscuous and almost always end up with much older men.

Can we say Anna Nicole?

Er. Not all of us. My father was killed when I was7, and I've had some....bad experiences with the males in my life, but I managed not to turn out like that.

[Andara Bledin]

Also note that her biological father is/was a police officer and very controlling.

That makes me wonder if her father's not the reason she's such a tease. He's always defined her boundaries, so she's never had a chance to learn how to set them herself. Or maybe once she's away from him, she just does stuff like that for the simple fact that she can.

^-.-^

[FenigDurak]

It's also behavior that crops up among girls with absent fathers. If the parents were divorced or never married, and a girl's father was one of those who never made time, she'll try to get male attention in the quickest way possible. And the most obvious clue is that she is looking for attention from an older man specifically.

Fair warning that this may delve into personal territory.

My parents never married, and soon after my father was incarcerated. It was always Mom and Me. She worked full time to raise me and pay for medical school so I spent weekends at my Grandparents' home, with my Mom's youngest (adopted) brother. I now believe he was molested as a child before coming to stay at my Grandparents' as it's typically repeated behavior what he did to me until I was 7.

Fortunately for me, I never followed through on my behavior in High School. I teased, but was terrified of following through. I was OK with the reputation that I earned because I figured it was better than the reputation my friend Chrissy had (she had 1 kid before graduation, and 1 more right after). I figured it was a control thing. Control was taken from me, so I was exerting it now.

I didn't seek counseling until I was 22. I'm glad I did. Four years later I'm finally in a healthy relationship, getting along beautifully with my Mom and Step Dad, and am about to graduate from a private university. So it is possible to turn things around. I sincerely hope both of the girls mentioned in this thread seek help. Sooner rather than later.