Can you hear the words I'm saying?

[Apathy]

Just a quick couple I was reminded of today.

Answering the phone:

Me: Hello, *Store name*, Toys, can I help you?
SC: Is this the post office?
Me: No.

I got that a couple times.

Me: Hello, *Store name*, Furniture, this is *me.*
SC: Is this furniture?
Me: Yes.

Sometimes I would just answer, "Furniture." They still asked if they had furniture.
The thing is, I got this all the time for that department, but not for Toys or Sporting Goods or anything like that.

[Bramblerose]

Oh, a little pity please, I have been known to space completely and miss part of the intro.

Admittedly, if I called for the post office and heard "toys", I would say "Wait, what?" and be really confused!

[smileyeagle1021]

you at least don't get my favorite "do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth" moment
me- (hotel) reservation desk, this smileyeagle speaking, may I ask with whom I'm speaking?
sc- i'm fine, thanks for asking, i'm looking for...

umm, how did "may I ask with whom I'm speaking" turn into "how are you today"

[Bagga]

But everyone knows that Furniture salesman are a bunch of out-and-out liars. So if a department answers "Furniture", it probably ISN'T TRUE! It's probably the white goods department - they can't be trusted either...

(runs for cover)

[Nyx]

LMAO I love when I get that! I always answer the phone "Thank you for calling Michael's on D--- V-----, this is A-----, how may I help you?" and often I get "Is this Michael's?" or "Is this the Michael's on D--- V-----?" If only they'd listen.

I also get many different names 'cause they never listen to what I said, I've gotten Rowanda and Rhonda etc. I've stopped correcting them...

[Bandit]

Try answering the phone "Yugoslavian Embassy. How may I mis-direct your call?"

And yes, if I recognize the number, I will answer the work phone that way.

:P

B

[mattm04]

Since we have an auto attendant that states the company name we will just answer the phone "dept. This is <name speaking>. half they time they will ask "is this <dept>" despite listening to the auto attendant say Press 1 for X, Press 2 for Y, etc. and pressing the button, which then tells them where their call was transferred to.

[Legal Eagle]

i'm wondering, does your store actually include a post-office or was that totally out of left field?

[Apathy]

I'm wondering, does your store actually include a post-office or was that totally out of left field?

Left field. Completely.

[Boochan]

Me: Hello, *Store name*, Toys, can I help you?
SC: Is this the post office?
Me: No.

I got that a couple times..

I get this INSIDE my store. Customers coming in and going on about what they need (i.e Parcels, boxes, etc) when this store is very clearly not the post office. Our only similarities with the post office is the fact our signage is Red and White. Nothing else, we don't even sell boxes or envelopes or anything like that.

And these people aren't senile either.

[Sarlon]

favorite ways for me to answer my personal phone to everyone BUT my parents...

"City Morgue...you stab them we slab them"

"Nut house head nut speaking"

"good bye this is no one, how may i refuse to answer your call?"

ANd my ALL time favorite...actually used on my last day at the call center I worked at...(no one said anything though I got a few chuckles from the person sitting next to me)

"thank you for calling the 9th level of hell how may i direct your soul?" (insert sappiest sweetest sounding voice you can imagine)

"(opening spiel) how may I mess up your account today?" (insert sappiest sweetest sounding voice you can imagine)

"city morgue....this is *me* where do you need the body picked up from?"

"(normal opening speil...followed by getting account info...) ok I don't see your problem...however...if I squint my eyes flip around 3 times, and stand on my head I think I can do something for you...like throw up...maybe that will help?" (THANKFULLY the customer had a good sense of humor on that one)

"hi we're not here today, but a bunch of monkies are handling our calls for us...they are also the ones that printed up your bill and will be more then happy to answer any of your questions...oh...my name? sure its Monkey experiment gone horribly wrong number 12893827?"