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It's been a while since I posted here, real life situations have been taking an interesting positive turn (and may do so even more soon), but it was taking away my CS time. Never fear, as I had a trio of prize winners to balance out the good things happening:
I Don't Care That I Didn't Do My End Of The Deal, I Still Want Freebies!
So we have a somewhat unoffical policy at work. If you have a problem with an On Demand movie and you call in, we'll tell you to order it again and we'll credit off one of the charges once the bill prints. The catch of course is we tell you the *same* movie, so when we see 2 orders within the same day of the same title it's easy to see one of them was f'ed and needs credit.
Cue the entitlement whore.......
EW: My daughter had a problem with this movie 3 months ago (my note: the problem was it didn't save for the full 24 hours it was supposed to, but they were able to watch it) and you all told me if she reordered it again you'd credit it back.
Me: Yes, that is usually what we'd say in that situation.
EW: Well she ordered a different movie but I still want credit for it.
Me:
She ordered a different movie?
EW: Yes, I told her she could.
Me. So you called in, and we told you to re-order the movie, correct?
EW: Yes.
Me: And you told her to order a different one?
EW: Yes.
Me: We only give credit if the same movie is reordered.
EW: BUT YOU TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD ME...........
Me: *interrupting somewhat* We told you to reorder the same movie and YOU chose not to.........
EW: *interrupting me* BUT ITS THE PRINCIPLE OF THE THING!!
Me: Ma'am, we told you what to do to get a refund and you CHOSE to not do it.
EW: BUUUUUUUUUUUUUT THE PRINCIPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me:. I understand that, but we told you what to do and again YOU CHOSE to not do it.
EW: I WANT A SUPERVISOR NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
So off she went to Supervisorland, normally I'd wager they caved in and gave it to her but considering it was almost 3 months ago and she just now got butthurt over it I'd probably guess she got told to go pound salt.
People Want Us To Make Nearly A Million Calls a Month
Stupid Lady calls in, she had a promotion on her service for a year, which has expired. She of course has that problem most of our customers have where turning over the bill causes great pain so they never do it. The following ensues:
SL: *rant on how her bill is significantly higher than last month*
Me: Well ma'am it appears your one year promotion ended last month and this bill reflects full price of your services.
SL: WELL YOU PEOPLE NEVER TOLD ME IT WAS ENDING, WHY DIDN'T ANYONE CALL ME UP AND LET ME KNOW?
Me: It did show on your bill for the last year that the price was a 12 month promotional price, so you did have notice that it wasn't permanent.
SL: I DON'T HAVE TIME TO READ MY BILLS, YOU PEOPLE (My note:Why is it they always have to call us "you people" like it was some politically incorrect 1930s era movie? I digress....) SHOULD MAKE CALLS WHEN THE TIME IS UP, WHY DON'T YOU DO THAT??
Me: *thinking "because we have over 800,000 customers in the area you stupid cow, do you know how high your bill would be if we had to pay people to call every one of our customers in case some of them are too flarging important to read their bills?"* We let you know on the bill ma'am, so you did have warning about this.
SL: WELL YOUR COMPANY IS ALWAYS RIPPING PEOPLE OFF, THIS IS BULLSHIT.
Yes ma'am, it certainly is bullshit that grown ass people need their hands held through important matters like bill paying. Excuse us for assuming people actually read the pieces of paper they pay "OMG RIPOFF" prices for.
Our Supervisors Can Bend Space and Time Like Q
This was the worst kind of SC, the ones who have a legit reason to be cranky but then become completely unreasonable about the resolution:
Me: How can I help you today?
Cranky Toddler Lady: Yeah, you guys disconnected my phone today (she requested it) and ever since my cable doesn't work.
*I run tests and see her box isn't responding so it needs a tech to look at it*
Me: We can have someone out as soon as tomorrow between 12-2 (keep in mind this was at about quarter to six tonight and techs work till 7 every day, next day was pretty effing quick turnaround on short notice like that).
CTL: WHAT? I WANT SOMEONE OUT TOOOOOOOOOO-NIGHT! (you know it's cranky time when they break "tonight" into two words)
Me: I'm sorry but it's not going to be possible to send anyone out tonight, the techs are already finishing up for the night.
CTL: I WANT TO SPEAK TO SOMEONE ELSE!
Me: Ma'am no one else can get anyone out tonight either (this is true, not even supervisors are getting anyone out same day after about 5 or so).
CTL: FINE, SEND SOMEONE OUT FIRST THING IN THE MORNING THEN.
*facepalm*
Me: The soonest I can get someone out is 12-2 tomorrow.
CTL: WHY NOT THE MORNING, I WANT SOMEONE OUT IN-THE-MORNING!
Me. There is no time available, there's no way I can do that.
CTL: I WANT TO SPEAK TO SOMEONE ELSE! (at this point the first thing that pops into my mind is this pic )
Me: No one else is going to be able to make the time available either.
CTL: AND WHY NOT?
Me: (honestly trying not to be a smartass but not knowing how else to answer) Because we can't physically add more time to a day, when time is filled it's not available.
What made it memorable is that during this whole encounter she's not acting like a typically yelling and screaming SC, but she's seriously sounding like she's on the brink of a full out temper tantrum over this. In the end she finally asked for a supervisor, so off she went to try to ask them to defy space and time.
So those were the high points of my workday, thankfully I'm going to NJ/NYC for vacation in less than two weeks so no one's going to upset me.
I Don't Care That I Didn't Do My End Of The Deal, I Still Want Freebies!
So we have a somewhat unoffical policy at work. If you have a problem with an On Demand movie and you call in, we'll tell you to order it again and we'll credit off one of the charges once the bill prints. The catch of course is we tell you the *same* movie, so when we see 2 orders within the same day of the same title it's easy to see one of them was f'ed and needs credit.
Cue the entitlement whore.......
EW: My daughter had a problem with this movie 3 months ago (my note: the problem was it didn't save for the full 24 hours it was supposed to, but they were able to watch it) and you all told me if she reordered it again you'd credit it back.
Me: Yes, that is usually what we'd say in that situation.
EW: Well she ordered a different movie but I still want credit for it.
Me:
She ordered a different movie?EW: Yes, I told her she could.
Me. So you called in, and we told you to re-order the movie, correct?
EW: Yes.
Me: And you told her to order a different one?
EW: Yes.
Me: We only give credit if the same movie is reordered.
EW: BUT YOU TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLD ME...........
Me: *interrupting somewhat* We told you to reorder the same movie and YOU chose not to.........
EW: *interrupting me* BUT ITS THE PRINCIPLE OF THE THING!!
Me: Ma'am, we told you what to do to get a refund and you CHOSE to not do it.
EW: BUUUUUUUUUUUUUT THE PRINCIPLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me:. I understand that, but we told you what to do and again YOU CHOSE to not do it.
EW: I WANT A SUPERVISOR NOWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!
So off she went to Supervisorland, normally I'd wager they caved in and gave it to her but considering it was almost 3 months ago and she just now got butthurt over it I'd probably guess she got told to go pound salt.
People Want Us To Make Nearly A Million Calls a Month
Stupid Lady calls in, she had a promotion on her service for a year, which has expired. She of course has that problem most of our customers have where turning over the bill causes great pain so they never do it. The following ensues:
SL: *rant on how her bill is significantly higher than last month*
Me: Well ma'am it appears your one year promotion ended last month and this bill reflects full price of your services.
SL: WELL YOU PEOPLE NEVER TOLD ME IT WAS ENDING, WHY DIDN'T ANYONE CALL ME UP AND LET ME KNOW?
Me: It did show on your bill for the last year that the price was a 12 month promotional price, so you did have notice that it wasn't permanent.
SL: I DON'T HAVE TIME TO READ MY BILLS, YOU PEOPLE (My note:Why is it they always have to call us "you people" like it was some politically incorrect 1930s era movie? I digress....) SHOULD MAKE CALLS WHEN THE TIME IS UP, WHY DON'T YOU DO THAT??
Me: *thinking "because we have over 800,000 customers in the area you stupid cow, do you know how high your bill would be if we had to pay people to call every one of our customers in case some of them are too flarging important to read their bills?"* We let you know on the bill ma'am, so you did have warning about this.
SL: WELL YOUR COMPANY IS ALWAYS RIPPING PEOPLE OFF, THIS IS BULLSHIT.
Yes ma'am, it certainly is bullshit that grown ass people need their hands held through important matters like bill paying. Excuse us for assuming people actually read the pieces of paper they pay "OMG RIPOFF" prices for.
Our Supervisors Can Bend Space and Time Like Q
This was the worst kind of SC, the ones who have a legit reason to be cranky but then become completely unreasonable about the resolution:
Me: How can I help you today?
Cranky Toddler Lady: Yeah, you guys disconnected my phone today (she requested it) and ever since my cable doesn't work.
*I run tests and see her box isn't responding so it needs a tech to look at it*
Me: We can have someone out as soon as tomorrow between 12-2 (keep in mind this was at about quarter to six tonight and techs work till 7 every day, next day was pretty effing quick turnaround on short notice like that).
CTL: WHAT? I WANT SOMEONE OUT TOOOOOOOOOO-NIGHT! (you know it's cranky time when they break "tonight" into two words)
Me: I'm sorry but it's not going to be possible to send anyone out tonight, the techs are already finishing up for the night.
CTL: I WANT TO SPEAK TO SOMEONE ELSE!
Me: Ma'am no one else can get anyone out tonight either (this is true, not even supervisors are getting anyone out same day after about 5 or so).
CTL: FINE, SEND SOMEONE OUT FIRST THING IN THE MORNING THEN.
*facepalm*
Me: The soonest I can get someone out is 12-2 tomorrow.
CTL: WHY NOT THE MORNING, I WANT SOMEONE OUT IN-THE-MORNING!
Me. There is no time available, there's no way I can do that.
CTL: I WANT TO SPEAK TO SOMEONE ELSE! (at this point the first thing that pops into my mind is this pic )
Me: No one else is going to be able to make the time available either.
CTL: AND WHY NOT?
Me: (honestly trying not to be a smartass but not knowing how else to answer) Because we can't physically add more time to a day, when time is filled it's not available.
What made it memorable is that during this whole encounter she's not acting like a typically yelling and screaming SC, but she's seriously sounding like she's on the brink of a full out temper tantrum over this. In the end she finally asked for a supervisor, so off she went to try to ask them to defy space and time.
So those were the high points of my workday, thankfully I'm going to NJ/NYC for vacation in less than two weeks so no one's going to upset me.
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