Whipping up a shitstorm

[elysia]

I am sick to death of customers who think that because a package has a tracking number, I should be able to tell exactly what point in space it occupies at any given moment in time, the speed and velocity it is currently travelling down its exact street, who the driver is and what his cell phone number is, which street corner they would quickest be able to intercept him on becaue they NEED IT NOW.
Sorry, I can't do that because a tracking number is not a goddam GPS system. I am not omniscient, either, nor all powerful, so no, I will not be able to call the driver delivering your package 500 miles away and tell him to hurry up nor make your box magically appear on your doorstep with a snap of my fingers.

Me: <phone spiel>
SC: "Yes, hi this is Blah. I shipped a package with you to my son in southern California and it hasn't arrived yet. I'm freaking out because it has ALL his summer clothes in it!! You told me it would be there today!!"
Me: "Alright, let me track it for you... do you have the tracking number?"
SC: "I tracked it and it says out for delivery. But you don't remember me?"
Ah, yes, I remember you. You were the psycho in here two days ago acting all OCD about shipping shirts, you made me pack them, as you watched, between sheets of cardboard with bubble wrap and peanuts, swearing all the while they would stay folded in the box on their unfortunate journey to your offspring. Who, by the look of these clothes, wouldn't be caught dead wearing them anyway.
Me: "Yes, but if you have the tracking number handy I'll be able to see where that box is right away."
SC: **spouts tracking number**
Me: "Ah, yes, I am showing that this package is 'out for delivery.' That means he will be recieving it today."
SC: "But he was supposed to get them THIS MORNING. You told me he would have them in the morning!"
Me: "Well, you opted for the ground shipping because overnight service with morning delivery was too expensive. Unfortunatly when an item is shipped ground service there is no way to garuntee its delivery by a particular time of day."
SC: **whine** But he neeeeeeeeeeds his summer clothes!"
Me: "Its out for delivery. He will get them today."
SC: "When?"
Me: "By the end of the day."
SC: **pissy** "Is there any way you could call the driver and have him go there first? He's right near down town area I'm sure it wouldnt be too much trouble."
Me: "I'm sorry I don't have the ability to do that. But ma'am, he will be recieving them today."
SC: "WELL HE BETTER! IF NOT YOU CAN REST ASSURED YOU WILL BE HEARING BACK FROM ME!!! **click**

Does this seem mildly insane to anyone else. I mean, if it was medication or something I could understand a little more. But goddam clothes? They weren't even late yet and she is calling me all explosive. Jesus Christ.
I enjoy the fact that every time there is even a little tiny hiccup with a package getting delivered, doesnt matter if it was the fault of some driver in Alabama or some kid at the loading dock in New York, the shitstorm falls on me. When people create problems when one doesnt even exist yet it makes me want to commit murder.

ps I tracked her package this morning and it was delivered an hour and a half after her raging phone call.

[MoonChild2007]

I can't stand those people. I get the same crap at my call center when it comes to tech. They want ME to call the tech so that they could find out when he is coming.
Jeez, look, it is DISPATCH's job to contact the tech not me.

[Moggie]

I used to work for a shipping company that handled such interesting items as pianos, over sized paintings, and marble fireplace mantels as well as your more common swimming pool ladders and pool tables.

I remember picking up the phone a number of times to hear screaming, swearing and crying because the EW on the other end had heard someone "promise it would be here by 10am and I have to be at the nail salon in 20 minutes!" or "You told me it would be here before I went to work!" If someone called and was very nice and polite about it, I could ask the local driver to put it on the back of the truck, instead of in the front, but most of the time the drivers already had the best route planned out when they loaded in the morning. No one at the company would have been dumb enough to give an actual exact time of delivery, considering all the things that might go wrong.

The best one was when a woman called to tell us she was going to sue for damages to her wooden floors and walls. It seems that her husband had been home when the delivery truck showed up with his new jukebox and he paid the drivers extra to move it upstairs for him. We had a second floor fee for just such a use. Sadly, neither the drivers, nor the husband had thought to put down towels or mats or any other form of protection. They just dragged the massive thing through the house and up the stairs, putting big gouges in the floor and walls. The husband said it was ok and he didn't mind, but his wife spawned fire-breathing kittens at us. Lucky for the driver, he'd had the good sense to get the husband to sign a damge waiver. She was S. O. L.

[jerkface11]

You know UPS lets you call back a package now. Just throwing that out there.

[LambChop]

My first thought after reading that was this comic:



Hehehe.

But seriously, that woman must've slipped on her med schedule. Otherwise, She's just another 'complainer' who validates their existence by blaming their problems on someone/something else.

[Phantomgrift]

That was a particular bane when working at the Greyhound.
Didn't matter if it was passengers or packages.

"I NEED TO FIND X!!"

"Okay sir/miss, it's supposed to be at Y by Z..."

"BUT I NEED TO KNOW WHERE IT IS"

"I can-"

"CANT YOU JUST LOOK X UP! I GAVE YOU THE INFORMATION!"

"Right then! Based on the information you just gave me, I can tell you that X is somewhere between Montana and Tennessee!"


It was even better for passengers because so many people seemed to miss the concept that a person can leave the bus at any point in time they desire.

[SuperB]

Yeah why is it that they think we either know it's location at any given time of the day or have any control over it's arrival? I get that all the time. Just the other day a local business called looking for a key a customer was supposed to be mailing back. The problem with this question is... if I receive it.... you will receive it. It does not benefit us to withhold your mail. I have often had to explain to people that we have absolutely no control over their mail until it arrives in our hot little hands. They just don't get it.

[Leopardmadcat]

WTH? Since when does UPS require YOU (the shipping clerk) to pack items for a client? Round here the clerk won't touch anything unless it's already in the pack and all up to specs... otherwise it's "go home and do it again!".

Packing a clients clothes for them... ick!

[rerant]

I would just die of laughter if her son wasn't even at home to receive the package and had to go pick it up from a depot later on.


Also, *ahem* post 1,000.

[garth1]

WTH? Since when does UPS require YOU (the shipping clerk) to pack items for a client? Round here the clerk won't touch anything unless it's already in the pack and all up to specs... otherwise it's "go home and do it again!".

Packing a clients clothes for them... ick!

Probably one of those independent shipping stores, or one bought out by UPS.

[Reyneth]

ps I tracked her package this morning and it was delivered an hour and a half after her raging phone call.

Awww, dang! I was going to bet that pwecious wasn't even home and it was a location that had to be signed for so he didn't get them today anyway!

[unclejampuff]

AMEN.
Srsly, that has got to be the most annoying thing I deal with when I do customer service stuff. If they had paid for a more sophisticated shipping method, they'd have more info. But when you send something Parcel Post, there's nothing anyone can do.