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  • Nervous shoplifter

    Some pre-story info: We have rawhide and dog cookies at my store, priced by the pound. We also provide bags, whitch are either made of white paper or clear plastic. The plastic ones are easier to look into, so they're not a problem. The paper bags however, need to be checked at the register before being rung up. This is so no customers sneak extra items into the bag. All cashiers are required to check these bags.

    So when NSL ( Nervous Shoplifter) brought a large paper bag to my register earlier this evening, tightly closed with twisty-ties, I began opening it to check it.

    NSL: I have dog cookies in there, you don't have to look.

    Me: Yes I do *opens bag and sees what could be at least three pound of cookies*

    NSL: It makes me very nervous when people look through my bags.

    Me: Sorry miss, but it's my job. *prods through cookies, sees a packet of Greenies*

    NSL: None of the other girls look in my bag, they trust me. I come in here all the time.

    Me: Well, it's not their job to trust you. They're suppose to check your bags, no matter who you are or how often you come here. *finds more Greenies and a $20 leather dog coller*

    NSL: You're being very rude and are the worst cashier I've ever had here. Call your manager, I want to talk to him.

    Me: *pulls out almost-stolen items* And you're the dumbest shoplifter I've ever caught. But I'll be more then happy to call the manager so you can talk to him

    NSL: You're a

    Me: And you're a theif

    NSL: I'm never coming here again *starts to leave*

    Me: Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya!

    Customers behind NSL, who waited patiently through the entire thing:

    I love being on register with shoplifting SCs, lets me be evil and actually be praised for it.

  • #2
    Oh noes! Some dumbass who is trying and failing MISERABLY to steal from me isn't going to come back anymore?!? What will we doooooo?!?

    What a doof!
    "This is the first time I've seen you look ugly, and that makes me happy!"

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    • #3
      Ya gotta wonder about the nervous shoplifter. If you weren't nervous, chances are we wouldn't start suspecting things.

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      • #4
        sounds like the kid that brought 2 Arizona Teas to my counter, only had enough for one, made the attempt to put the other one back but put it under his shirt(obvious). BUSTED.
        USN Retired

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        • #5
          Quoth Jade Pheonix View Post
          Me: And you're a theif

          NSL: I'm never coming here again *starts to leave*
          Sir, the choice to come here or not is no longer yours. For attempted shoplifting you are banned.
          I never lost my faith in humanity. Can't lose what you never had right?

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          • #6
            NSL: It makes me very nervous when people look through my bags.
            gee, i wonder WHY...
            look! it's ghengis khan!
            Sorry, but while I can do many things, extracting heads from anuses isn't one of them. (so sayeth the irv)

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            • #7
              Quoth Jade Pheonix View Post
              NSL: You're a

              Me: And you're a theif

              NSL: I'm never coming here again *starts to leave*

              Me: Don't let the door hit ya where the good lord split ya!
              THE GORD LIVES!
              - They say nothing good happens at 2AM, they're right, I happen at 2AM.

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              • #8
                Jade--

                You REALLY should've called the manager, let NSL tell his side of the story, then show the manager what you found in the bag.
                Unseen but seeing
                oh dear, now they're masquerading as sane-KiaKat
                There isn't enough interpretive dance in the workplace these days-Irv
                3rd shift needs love, too
                RIP, mo bhrionglóid

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                • #9
                  Quoth Argabarga View Post
                  THE GORD LIVES!
                  Door's to your left.

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Jade Pheonix View Post
                    Me: And you're a theif

                    And a very bad one at that.

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                    • #11
                      Sadly, from my junior high thievery days, I could give some good lessons to these idiot shoplifters on how to do it right! Because these people just sound really bad and really dumb.

                      Fortunately, I am keeping my trade secrets to myself, and haven't stolen anything more than a kiss in over 20 years. And damn it, I deserve those!

                      "The Customer Is Always Right...But The Bartender Decides Who Is
                      Still A Customer."

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                      • #12
                        Why in the world would she want to talk to a manager??!?!?!!?!?! If I was a dumb theiving SC, I would have split the second the bag was opened claiming illness or something. However, I don't steal so I don't have this problem.
                        "I'm still walking, so I'm sure that I can dance!" from Saint of Circumstance - Grateful Dead

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                        • #13
                          Maybe she thought the manager was of the spineless wimp variety that'll cave in to *anything* a "customer" demands, such as not having the contents of the bag checked for stolen goods.

                          Hopefully, she was wrong.
                          "Crazy may always be open for business, but on the full moon, it has buy one get one free specials." - WishfulSpirit

                          "Sometimes customers remind me of zombies, but I'm pretty sure that zombies are smarter." - MelindaJoy77

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                          • #14
                            Wow Even /I/ could have thought of better excuses then that. "Makes me nervous when people check through my bags" I just...do these people actually think that excuses like that will work?

                            "Oh, don't look in my bag please, it makes me nervous."

                            Cashier: "Oh, all right! Since you asked, of course I won't!"
                            Pit bull-

                            There is no breed of dog more in need of our compassion; in need of our call to arms on their behalf; and in need of what should be the full force of our enduring sanctuary.

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                            • #15
                              Oh, no! You're loosing a valued shoplifter! What will you do?
                              "500 bucks, that's almost a million!"
                              ~Curly from the 3 Stooges

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