<Sob> I knew it was too good to last... (Lengthy)

[lupo pazzesco]

So, quick bit of info, inventory at our store is next week. This is going to suck, because we don’t close for inventory, which means we have to adjust the stock every freakin’ day, as we’re counting. Anyways, I apparently have super clerical or secretary powers I was unaware of, because all THREE of my managers decided I had to organize/sort/file/data entry stuff for them these last few weeks to get ready for inventory, when our district manager comes in for the audit. That way, they can show him they’re all up to date and organized, etc. This has meant I haven’t had to deal with customers for the last week and a half or so!! Yay! But all good things must come to an end, and I was thrown back to the sharks for the last couple of days, and as such, I’ve got stories!


<GASP> “You mean I have to PAY!?”
Had a woman come in. First, she confused the hell out of one of my newer CWs because she stated she wanted a book for social work, and he showed her the section, but apparently what she wanted wasn’t there. She couldn’t describe it better to him, so he brought her over to the desk, and thus, to me. (Oh joy!)

Turns out, she wanted a social work dictionary. We don’t carry them as a rule, meaning there weren’t any matching titles in our system, but I was feeling generous and all customer service-y after having a brief reprieve, so I decided to go a few extra miles. I run a general search on Amazon, find what she’s looking for, call our corporate warehouse to see if they stock it, and they do. I put a copy on hold for PO, meaning get ready to ship it as soon as I have the prepayment and PO number. I go to my textbook manager, have him adopt the title into our system, etc and work a deal with him. I then go back to the customer and explain the situation.

Me: All right, ma’am, it looks like we can do a special order for you. It’s a prepay option, but we’re going to go ahead and waive the shipping charges for you, my manager said that was ok.
SC: THAT’S what I’m talking about!
Me: (ok then…) So, I’m going to go ahead and fill out the paperwork, ok?
SC: Not a problem, thank you!
Me: <Fills out the form, gets all her info, and then> all right, now, as soon as you pay for this, I can place the order, and-
SC: Wait! What do you mean when I pay for this!?
Me: … Um, it’s a prepay special order, ma’am. You pay for the book, we order it, and call you when it arrives.
SC: You never told me I’d have to PAY for the book!
Me: (WTF?!?! You aren’t getting it free, sunshine!) Um, ma’am, I did tell you earlier it’s a prepay special order. Meaning you prepay for it.
SC: That’s unacceptable! You don’t have the book I need, and now I have to pay to get it.
Me: Well, yes.
SC: That’s stupid!
Me: Well, ma’am, it’s not a title we usually carry, so it has to be a prepay special order for us to get it.
SC: Well that’s not fair to customers!
Me: (What’s not fair?! That I’m bending over backwards to help you find a book YOU want? Bite me, bitch!) So…do you want to prepay for the special order or not, ma’am?
SC: No! I’LL go to the B&N campus store. THEY’LL treat me better than you!
Me: All righty then. <Rips up the special order form> Have a great day!
SC: You mean you’re not going to try and change my mind!?!?
Me: (You mean you actually have a mind!?!?!) No, ma’am. You said you didn’t want to book. So I’m going to call our warehouse, cancel the hold and the order.
SC: <SNARLRANTFOAMATMOUTH!!!> <And she storms out>
Me:


If at first you don’t succeed…be a guttermouthed asswipe, because you’ll really get respect then!!
So, I took a phone call from this…er…lady...wanting to know if we stocked books for a specific community college. Upon telling her we really only carry books that Big State University uses (BSU), and that I could look up a book by author/title to see if it’s in our store because BSU wants it, she apparently pulls a Jekyll/Hyde on me. It was scary… T_T

SC: What the fuck do you mean you have to look up the author and title! Why don’t you carry the fucking books for MY fucking school you fucking whore!?
Me:… because we’re the unofficial bookstore for BSU, ma’am. We’re licensed to sell their books and merchandise for the most part, but-
SC: That’s a huge pain in the ass for the rest of us, do you know that?! What about the 10,000 people at my school who need books our store doesn’t carry? I guess it’s ok to fuck us up the ass because we’re not important!
Me: (Compared to the 35,000+ students at BSU…? A bit disproportionate there, yes) Ma’am, I’m going to have to ask that you—
SC: Oh, and now you’re trying to be an even bigger bitch and try and tell me I can’t talk like I want! How’d you like it if someone came and fucked you up the ass like you’re doing to me, huh? Bet it’d be real painful, but then you’re a whore, so you’d probably like it!
Me: Ma’am! I am going to end this call. Now. <Click>

<Phone rings 30 seconds later, and I’m the only one there to answer it. >

Me: <opening spiel>
SC: <Yeah, the same one from before> Hi, I think our call was disconnected, now could you please look up <book> by <author> and tell me if you carry it?
Me: <Does so, inwardly cringing, when I see we don’t have it> I’m sorry ma’am, we don’t carry that title…
SC: Oh, well shoot. Thanks for your time, you have a great day! <Click>
Me: I want my mommy…


pot to kettle! Come in kettle!
Had two girls come through the registers while I was up there fixing a display of diploma frames. CW rang them up, and one jokingly asked if we were hiring, the other one, (SC2) immediately cut her off.

SC2: Oh, geez, I could NEVER work for a bookstore! They have no respect for students as people! They don’t understand how much we struggle!
SC1: <nasty laugh> This is true. It’s like they think we’re not human! <Glares at CW who’s folding the shirts and bagging them> Can’t you go any faster! We’re kind of in a hurry.
CW: <finishes and tells her the total>
SC2: <drops a card on the counter> I mean, it’s like they need to understand that college students have to work really hard to survive, and bookstores just want to take and take and take, you know?
SC1: Totally.
CW: <interrupts to ask if the card is credit or debit, and gets snarled at that it’s credit, she runs the card>
SC2: <Snaps her fingers> Any day now!
CW: <Hands over the CC slip to sign, and smiles, wishing them a good day>

They exit without answering, continuing their conversation about lack of respect, and how people need to be treated like actual humans.

CW and I just share a look. Nothing that can really be said to that level of hypocrisy…


General note to stupid customers
This is OCTOBER!!! OCTOBER!! Classes are over on December 6th!! That’s a little over a month away. It’s understandable we’ve sold out of most of our fall books, and we’re getting ready for Spring right now!! Stop bitching and whining and moaning that we dare to not have the book you need for the test you have in 2 days/tomorrow/3 hours! Not our fault! You fail! Now fuck off. Kthxbye!!!


Wow, you’re a shining example of citizenship…
I don’t speak Spanish very well. I understand it more, but that comes from growing up in a border town, you know? So, we had this nice lady come in, and only spoke Spanish. My poor textbook manager looked mystified, so I asked if she needed help, and managed to figure out she was looking for a Spanish/English dictionary. I managed to communicate, though it involved massive amounts of arm flailing, wild gesturing, and general butchering of both languages, in a dialect that can’t even be referred to as Spanglish. It was more of a mutated offspring of Spanglish, exposed to a valley girl/ghetto culture gone horribly horribly wrong. But I managed. Anyways, while trying to help this woman, this law student comes up and he immediately butts in.

SC: Where are your <insert item here>
Me: I’m sorry, sir, I’m currently helping a customer, give me a moment and I’ll be right with you. <Goes back to speaking my Mutant Spanish, complete with flailing>
SC: <Interrupts again, snidely> You might want to help someone who can pay you in AMERICAN money.
Me: …
SC: I need to find <Insert stupid item here>
Me: Sir, I’ll be right with you. If you don’t want to wait, you can go to the counter, I’m sure someone will be there to help you. (Not really because I’m the only one working the floor right now, asshole, but if it’ll get you out of my hair…)
SC: I’m an actual American citizen, not a low class immigrant who can’t even be bothered to learn English!
Me: Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to leave.
SC: I want your manager!
Me: So do I! <Apologizes to the woman, and goes to page a manager, and the awesome K comes out>
SC: Great! You’re stupid employee is wasting time helping that stupid illegal alien, when I’m just trying to find a <stupid item I can’t remember>
K: Are you fucking kidding me?
SC: what?
K: first of all, you just insulted my employee, and another potential customer, AND made a prejudicial slur.
SC: But—
K: I think you need to leave my store
SC: But you’ll lose my business!
K: Don’t think we need it. Bye now.
SC: <Storms out in a huff, threatening to sue, etc, etc>
K: <Stands at the counter until I finish helping the woman, and can come back>
Me: <mutters>Stupid maggot infested twatpumpkin.
K: Pretty much.
Me: Thanks for manning the counter
K: no problem. Besides it was fun watching your interpretive dance over there. My advice, don’t quit your day job.
Me: >.> Gee…thanks…



Aaaand, that’s all for now. I’m sure I’ll oh so many more tales to come.

[KiaKat]

Bwuahahahahahaa....I think I like your manager.

And I'm stealingborrowing 'twatpumpkin.' Brilliant.

[Snowbird]

SC: No! I’LL go to the B&N campus store. THEY’LL treat me better than you!
Me: All righty then. <Rips up the special order form> Have a great day!

Did I ever tell you you're my heeeeroooo? er. I cannot count the times I have wanted to do that in front of a SC like that. Bravo!

Oh to have butted in on that 'I want a job here' duo's conversation. It'd be too tempting to poker face through mock-agreeing with the other one's argument by stating things like, "Oh totally, and the levels of suck you have to deal with from stupid customers, it just isn't worth it. Have a nice day!". Oy.

[PepperElf]

you fucking whore!?

i'm surprised you didn't give her the <click> right then and there.

lol... twatpumpkin
right up there with cockwallet

[Evil Queen]

The Dr. Jekyll/Mr Hyde thing has me spooked.... I think that woman called me before!

...I know I already heard it before but....

TwatPumpkin!

[otakuneko]

Ah, I knew we were overdue for som Lu-PWNAGE.

Jekyll/Hyde: Wow, I wonder what medication she took in between those calls!

pot to kettle: Now if only coworker could've whipped out a student ID.

[PizzaDrone]

Students mentioned in this make me ashamed to be a student. Who wouldn't love to work in a book shop?! I spoke to the guy who works the campus book shop today and he said the only downside is that he usually ends up spending more than he makes lol.

Hope things get better for you lupo.

[fireheart]

Heehee, TwatPumpkin

That made my day.

EDIT: Also....

:worship

We worship Lupo's fingers for having to come into contact with SC's, more SC's and typing up these stories that we all enjoy.

[bainsidhe]

So the first lady was upset, not because she had to prepay, but because she had to pay period. What. The. Fudge.

And as much as I loooove your stories, it pains me to think that while I deal with the general masses at <big box retail> as I cashier, you have the benefit of dealing with mostly educated university employees and students. So why do I feel like the lucky one

[lupo pazzesco]

The Dr. Jekyll/Mr Hyde thing has me spooked.... I think that woman called me before!

...I know I already heard it before but....

TwatPumpkin!

You, too? So...we have a college student female version of Dr. Jekyll/Ms. Hyde, who wants to find college textbooks and a cheap hotel room in Houston? All righty then.

And I'm always happy to amuse you.

I spoke to the guy who works the campus book shop today and he said the only downside is that he usually ends up spending more than he makes lol.

I don't want to think about that. Do you know what agony it is to have the phone numbers to publishers, knowing you can get books when they come out if you special order them on your employee account and have them sent to you at the store?? Hell, I even have the order entry number for TokyoPop, if I wanted to get manga cheap. (Even though it's hit or miss on some of their translations...) Oh, what a trial!!

On top of that, add all the fun University merchandise we sell, like comfy hoodies, etc, etc, and yeah, bookstores are fun places to work. Of course, I never spend as much as I'd like. Actually, I never really spend a lot of money there aside from textbooks when necessary because I'm always broke!

Now I'm a sad Lupo cuz I thought about it too long.

And as much as I loooove your stories, it pains me to think that while I deal with the general masses at <big box retail> as I cashier, you have the benefit of dealing with mostly educated university employees and students. So why do I feel like the lucky one

I think those are topics it's best I not contemplate, lest I fling myself into a swirling maelstrom of depression, and do something drastic like, oh I don't know, fling myself from my first story patio in a fit of drama riddled angst.

In reality, I think it's the concept that these people are supposed to be educated, but they certainly don't act it. At <big box retail>, unless you have someone kicking up a stink and specifically announcing how educated and wealthy they are, you can presume they're all morons by their behavior. At my store, you kind of know better, realizing they're college educated university employees and students. It is rather cringe worthy.

Just my opinion, though.

[corporateslave]

Wow, these stories..
Those are some wicked SCs.

[lupo pazzesco]

Wow, these stories..
Those are some wicked SCs.

I certainly get the unique cases sometimes, I will admit.

[dawnfire]

Students mentioned in this make me ashamed to be a student. Who wouldn't love to work in a book shop?! I spoke to the guy who works the campus book shop today and he said the only downside is that he usually ends up spending more than he makes lol.

that would be my problem if i worked in any bookstore

[smileyeagle1021]

SC2: Oh, geez, I could NEVER work for a bookstore! They have no respect for students as people! They don’t understand how much we struggle!
.

kinda stupid question... but don't most of the people who work at your bookstore also go to school at BSU?

[lupo pazzesco]

kinda stupid question... but don't most of the people who work at your bookstore also go to school at BSU?

Aside from the management team, yes. Every employee is a student, either at BSU, or at another school close by, Small Private Uni, (SPU). Hell, even one of the managers takes classes part time at BSU, when he feels like it, because he gets VA assistance with classes.

Thus the general eye-rolling and silent looks between me and CW. It's just...yeah...