I feel as though I am in the movie Clerks...

[guitardude1987]

It's been a while since I've posted.

I changed jobs almost a year ago. I now work at Wal-Mart. Yes. The joy in my heart runneth over.

The toy department is great fun. Even more so now that Christmas is almost upon us.

Here are a few samples of the delightful meals of stupid that I dine upon each night. Forgive me as I will be copying Gravekeeper a little.

So you were born without the ability to turn your head? Sweet!

SC: *while standing in directly next to them* "Where are your jigsaw puzzles?"
Me: *turns head to the left toward the puzzles* "Just right along this wall..."

No. No you CAN'T!
SC: "Could you get that electric barbie car down so my daughter can test drive it?"
Me: "I'm sorry, I can't let you do that."
SC: "How will she know if she likes it if she can't test it first?"

Ok. I'm going to stop you right there. It's a plastic, electric children's toy that will allow your child to go, at the most, 5 MPH. There really isn't much to test drive. Really.

Three-Year-Olds will probably have a hard time with that...
Customer wants me to show her our wooden puzzles for younger kids. Like 1 to 3 year-olds.
SC: "Is this all you have?"
Me: "Yes, that's it."
SC: "Don't you have something, like, more complex? I mean, these are just little squares with the alphabet on them."
Me: "Well...no, these are for toddlers. I don't think they're quite up to putting together 3000 piece jigsaw puzzles yet."
SC: "Well, I don't want to buy something that my kid is going to put together in a few minutes and be done with it. I wanted something that will take a few hours or so."
Me: "You're more than welcome to buy them one of our bigger, more complex jigsaw puzzles. I'm just not entirely sure your 3 year old will really be able to do it."
She ends up buy a big 1000 piece jigsaw of a puppy.

That's only what I can think of so far. They aren't that impressive, but I'll shall think of more later. now...Sleep.

[nomorecarts]

at the self checks(the epicenter of stupid, usually the funny kind) when you scan an item with a sensor to set off the alarms by the door it tells you to touch the star and has a big flashing button that says "OK". way too many peole say something similar to "why isn't it working?". I think I'm going to sugest making it a big red button that says "DO NOT TOUCH"

[Sliceanddice]

oh oh besure to tell us when last puzzle lady comes back screaming about how her presous child ate a puzzle piece and you could have killed her!!!!!111!!!!111!!elevenity!!! and a half!!!!!

[Broomjockey]

A 1,000 piece puzzle? And that's going to take her kid "a few hours"? Not bleeding likely. Wasn't there something in between that and the wooden puzzles though? When I was a kid, there were like 50, 100, and 200 piece puzzles.

[Can I Help Your A$$?]

For crying out loud! If something can be done in a few minutes, that's like, a minute longer than their attention span.

This lady can't be the parent. If she is, I weep! Who in their right mind thinks that a 3 year-old wants something that takes "a few hours" to do? Hell, to do a 1000-piece takes ME a few days, since I've never had the patience to put one together in one sitting.

Really. REALLY.

[Reyneth]

For crying out loud! If something can be done in a few minutes, that's like, a minute longer than their attention span.

You took the words out of my mouth.

The only thing about that 1,000 piece puzzle that will entertain a 2-3 year old will be spilling all the pieces out on the kitchen floor and throwing and scattering them everywhere! For 3 minutes. Maybe 5.

[Misanthropical]

Hell, I can't even pay attention long enough to do a 1,000 piece puzzle, let alone a 3 year old.

My children would have slobbered all over the pieces and/or ate them, when they were 3 years old.

[Dreamstalker]

I would have tried to build something completely different (usually involving three dimensions and blatant attempts at violating the laws of gravity and physics).

[blas]

I'd eat the puzzle pieces that frustrate me.

[NateTheChops]

My sister is only 5 and she won't sit down that long to play memory. She's onto Candy Land though which rocks because that was my childhood game.

[DGoddessChardonnay]

A 1,000 piece puzzle? And that's going to take her kid "a few hours"? Not bleeding likely. Wasn't there something in between that and the wooden puzzles though? When I was a kid, there were like 50, 100, and 200 piece puzzles.

Sounds to me like it'll take that child until they go off to college to do a 1000-piece puzzle at that rate - at the very least.

I mean, we're talking a 3 year old - not a computer scientist.

[PepperElf]

I feel as though I am in the movie Clerks...

and now if any of the guys comes in with an injured back... you'll

[CaroPhoenix]

My 5-year-old does the 24-piece puzzles. I think they're for 3+. (Kelly's been doing them for like 2 years so far). She's really good at them. I want to get her like the either the 63 or 100-piece puzzles, but the pieces are much too small so she has trouble with them, but the 24-pieces, I think are too easy for her now, so I'm stuck.

[PhotoChick]

I think they have 50 piece puzzles with big pieces. *Checks google*

You could try something like this Six 48-Piece Puzzles or Melissa & Doug's 48 Piece Wooden Puzzles sold at Amazon for half the price

[BroSCFischer]

Three-Year-Olds will probably have a hard time with that...
Customer wants me to show her our wooden puzzles for younger kids. Like 1 to 3 year-olds.
SC: "Is this all you have?"
Me: "Yes, that's it."
SC: "Don't you have something, like, more complex? I mean, these are just little squares with the alphabet on them."

<snip>

She ends up buy a big 1000 piece jigsaw of a puppy.

That's only what I can think of so far. They aren't that impressive, but I'll shall think of more later. now...Sleep.

I bought my 3-yr old niece a Puzz-3d Cinderella's Castle Puzzle for X-mas. But I had no intention of her doing it at her age. I am putting it together so she has it to look at. This lady is an idiot.

[Off topic] I am the master of the free or nearly free toy. I once entertained my niece with a used Panera bread paper bag with a face drawn on it for over 1/2 hour. She'd shine a flashlight in it's face, and I'd turn it away saying "Ahh!" like it hurt it's eyes. Repeat. [/Off topic]

SC