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Idjit customers...I has them in Textbook Hell (Epic length, even for me!!!)
No, I’m not dead, nor have I dropped off the face of the planet!! I have, however, been laid up the last coupla weeks with a pretty nasty respiratory infection. I’m still kinda blah, but I’m getting better. Oh so slowly. As a result, I missed a lot of work, and ye gads is my paycheck going to suck. But, I went back this week, and came away with stories, just for you guys!!
So, quick bit of info, we started buybacks this week, and have started prepping for next semester. As a result, we’ve roped off the textbook section, since we’re clearing down the shelves unloading books from fall, and stocking books for spring, with pallets and boxes everywhere. These notes are important. A good chunk of the SCs are from buybacks and people wanting fall books. Keep in mind today, (Friday) is the LAST day of fall classes. Finals are next week. The semester is pretty much over. Anyhoo, moving on.
Reefer Madness…Squared..
So yes, textbook section is roped off. But does this deter people? Oh no, instead we had this guy wander in with a skateboard, and reeking of sweet Mary Jane to the point that I smelled him coming. He walks to the textbook section, I ask if I can help him find anything, and he shakes his head and keeps walking. And keeps walking. And runs into the yellow rope. And keeps trying to walk.
Upon realize that he’s not getting any further, he stumbles back over to the textbook counter and demands to know why he can’t go look at books, and thus the following conversation ensues.
Me: I’m sorry, sir. We’re setting up for Spring, and have the section closed off for everyone’s safety.
Him: But why? I mean, there’s, like, weeks left in the semester. Why can’t I go look at books?
Me: Um, sir, actually, classes end this Friday. Finals are next week. And we only have a limited period of time to get set up for next term. If you still need a book for this semester, I can look it up in our computers, and get it for you.
Him: But why are there ropes?
Me: To let people know the textbook section is closed for now, sir.
Him: But why ropes?
<Rinse, Lather, Repeat for about 5 minutes>
Me: (But WHY is the Rum gone?!?! <mental snicker>) Do you need a book, sir?
Him: <Sulkily> No. I just wanted to look. I guess I have to take my business elsewhere. <And he shuffles off>
Me: Ok then…
Flattery will get you nowhere
Remember my respiratory infection? Well, I’m doing a LOT better, thankfully. Still kind of congested and coughing, but nowhere near as bad sounding/looking as I did right before Thanksgiving. Apparently, I don’t look well enough, as this sweet little douchepumpkin felt fit to inform me.
SC: <After witnessing me cough into my elbow while turned away from her> Are you all right.
Me: <customer service smile, firmly in place> Oh, I’m fine, thank you. How can I help you, ma’am?
SC: Because seriously, you look like you’re about to fall over. You really shouldn’t be at work, infecting your customers.
Me: …um…I’m not contagious, ma’am…
SC: Sure you’re not. You look like hell.
Me: …can I help you find something, or are you going to continue flattering me, ma’am?
SC: No need to be sarcastic! <Storms off in a huff>
Customer my ass, she bought nothing. Apparently her purpose in life is to inform people when they look like hell. Must be a tough job. Really. Not so much suck as a WTF moment, I guess…
Third Time’s the Charm…
As store policy states, I can’t give a buyback quote over the phone. There are too many variables that can go wrong; people can give me wrong book info, I quote a price, and then when they come in and find out the actual price is lower, shit hits the fan. So, we direct them to our website, which has a section where you can enter your info, print a buyback quote for your books and bring them in. The onus is all on the customer. Of course, this hasn’t stopped people from calling in and asking how much we were buying a book back for. This woman called THREE times, I think, hoping if she kept calling we’d tire of directing her to the website, and just give in. She has no idea how stubborn I am when people are bugging me while I’m manning the counter by myself, and have five people waiting in line.
First call
SC: Yes, I’d like to know how much you’re buying my book back for?
Me: I’m sorry, we don’t give quotes over the phone. If you go to our website, you can look it up under the sell books tab, and get a quote.
SC: Oh, well, I’m not at a computer. Can you look it up for me.
Me: Ma’am, I need the physical book in front of me to scan, and a picture ID before doing a buyback transaction on my computers. You need to go to our website.
SC: Fine, what is it?
Me: thisstore.com/mylocation
<click>
Ten minutes later:
SC: Your website’s down!! Just tell me how much you’ll buy my book back for.
Me: I’m sorry, ma’am, I can’t do that.
SC: Well, how am I supposed to know if I can’t get on a computer
Me: (if you can’t get on a computer, how do you know the site is down??) Well, ma’am, all I can offer is our website again. thisstore.com/mylocation
SC: <Huffs angrily> Fine!! <Click>
Two minutes after that…
Me: <Answers phone with opening spiel>
SC: You lied to me! There’s nowhere for me to get a quote!!
Me: (<sob> just leave me alone!!!) What seems to be your problem, ma’am?
SC: I went to the website! Thisotherstore.com/locationinanotherstate!!! And there’s no tab for me to sell back books!!
Me: …
SC: Hello?!?!
Me: <Represses the urge to beat my head on the counter> Ma’am, the site is THISSTORE.com/MYLOCATION
SC: …oh… <click>
After about half an hour, I stopped wincing whenever the phone rang. Here’s hoping she figures it out and comes in when I’m not here!!!
Wherein I Discover An Exchange Student from Nunavut…
Customer comes into the store with someone I assume is a parent. Now, we recently received some t-shirts and hoodies in green camo. Dark forest green. Ok looking, compared to some past mishaps in clothing and spirit gear we’ve had, but not something I’d willingly spend money on. Now, if it was a gift and I haven’t done laundry in six months and it was my absolute last article of clean clothing and I had no Febreze to fake it with my other clothing, I’d wear it. Maybe.
So, these two females are prowling the store. Grabbing gads of merchandise, and being general nuisances, demanding we let them try stuff on, and if the size is wrong, I have to go fetch another size, and complaining the mirror is to small, the light isn’t bright enough, the selection is too big, but at the same time, it’s too small, and ooh, look, shiny!!!! All over the place. I finally manage to extricate myself from the tangle by mentioning I have to go back to my textbook section, and oh look, my co-worker knows more about the clothing than I do! I freely admit I threw her to the wolves and fled.
After another 15-20 minutes of inarticulate grunts and squeals as they roam the store, the girl SC spots the camo hoodies and t-shirts. And POUNCES!
SC: Look, look, they have CAMO!! Omg, isn’t it keeeewwwwwwwwt!?!?!
Me: <Resists the urge to dive behind the counter and hide in terror at the shrill squealing>
SCM: (SC’s mom) It’s too boyish looking. You wouldn’t look cute in it.
SC: True. Maybe if they had it in pink!
Me: <CRINGE!!!>
SC: I’ll ask. Hey, you!
Me: <Glances around and realizes CW has fled to the back room and I’m the only one on the floor. CRAP!!> Er…yes…?
SC: Do you make this in pink camo?
Me: Um, no. Sorry. That’s the only style we have like that.
SC: You need it in pink!! For the GIRLS!!
Me: I’ll…pass that on to my boss…
SC: Good. Well, maybe I can cut it up and make it cute and girly…<Goes back to perusing the camo>
SCM: <Raises her head and looks at me. Crap! Caught in her sights!> Where are your pants??
Me: <Double CRINGE!!> Um. We don’t carry pants. Usually just tops; t-shirts, hoodies, tanks, that kind of thing. Sometimes athletic shorts.
SCM: <Looks like I just devoured her firstborn’s soul and quite literally bellows> HOW CAN YOU NOT HAVE PANTS!?!?!
Me:
er…
SCM: <Goes into a rant about needing pants, wanting pants, something about pants pants pants…>
Me: Ok…
SCM: <As my CW finally emerges from the back room, she dumps the entire load of stuff she and her daughter had been carrying around on my textbook counter> We came for pants!! We can’t buy this stuff without pants!
Me: …
SCM: We’re going to the other store. THEY’LL have pants!!
Me: <decides it’s best not to talk or draw any further attention to myself. If I pretend I’m invisible, they can’t see me…>
SCM: <leaves, followed by SC>
CW:<Comes up to the counter, and starts sorting through the merchandise, so it can be re-shelved>…What was THAT all about…?
Me: They’ve learned to migrate south for the winter…
CW:
Me: Nevermind…
And your point is…?
I loathe buybacks. Mostly because we offer decent prices if we’re using the book next semester, but it’s never enough. Students can’t grasp the concept of depreciation of value. And hell, I don’t set the prices!! I can’t change them. Screaming at me that you paid so much for the books isn’t going to make me decide to change the rules just for you and essentially give you a full refund because you’re speshul. Sorry, cupcake, it doesn’t work that way. Two such incidents stand out in my mind.
#1
Girl sells back two books. We offer $152. And she throws a hissy fit. Why? Because she paid $225 for them!!!!!!11!!!!! Lady, do the math!!! We’re giving you over 60% of the price back!!! And that’s 60% of the NEW price!!! Your books have used stickers, so I very much doubt you paid new price for them!! Fine, refuse the buyback. I’ll see you next week when the price drops down to $75, and I will RELISH that $70 idiot tax. I will clutch it tightly to myself, and hoard the happy feeling it gives me to see your shocked look when I inform you that as our inventory goes up, the buyback price goes down, and in the week since you’ve been here, people have sold the books back. That’s what sucks about being the off campus store, sunshine!! We buy for more than one school!! And one school alone has 35,000+ students. Nanny nanny boo boo!
<Ahem> moving on…
#2
Another girl comes in with a book. We’re not using it in our store, but it’s a corporate title, meaning another store in our company has it on a want list. As such, we offer more for it, than if it was wholesale and going to a warehouse. We offered $19 for it. She starts screaming that she spent $100 on it, and we’re always trying to cheat poor, hard-working students, and she’s not going to stand for it, etc, etc. I don’t know why people think I’m gullible and without resources. I press two buttons on the keyboard. I discover the retail price of the book is $52 new. She had a used copy, which retails at $45-ish. So, she was getting almost 50%.
Lady, if you spent $100 on it, then you got robbed. And if you really want to throw money away, at least give it to a good cause. I’m standing right here!!!!
I’m forever branded…
Another day, another buyback. Guy comes up.
SC: Hey, you look kind of familiar.
Me: Well, I do work here a lot. I don’t think you and I have had a class together, though I could be wrong.
SC: Nah, that’s not it. Hey!! You’re the Plinko chick!!
Me: >.< (Oh gods, memory flashback! Scary mental place, scary mental place!!!) Oh. Yes. Yes I was…
SC: So, any scratch offs or deals for me today?
Me: Nope.
SC: Aw, c’mon, I played Plinko!!
Me: (And the funny thing is, you think this endears you to me. Ha. ) I’m sorry, sir, any promotions went out via snail mail or email. Even text message. We don’t have any in store items this time.
SC: Well, you suck, then, don’t you?
Me: o.0 Er…k…
SC: If you have nothing for me, I have nothing for you! <Scoops up his books and leaves>
Me: <To my CW standing next to me, in a deadpan voice> Stop. No. come back. However will I survive now?
CW:
In which I finally lose my temper with an SC
I’d been having a particularly bad day Wednesday. I was just wanting my shift to be over, it’d gotten colder, and it was making my breathing difficult and my coughing was a little worse. I just wanted to go home, drink tea, and go to sleep. Enter Mr. Douchewaffle. I knew right away he was one of those guys who I can’t prove is a thief, but he’s going to try to sell books anyway. It started going downhill immediately, as soon as he came to my counter. I freely admit the politeness was turned off on my part, but he started out a douche and got progressively worse.
SC: Hey, I got some books to sell.
Me: All right, sir, I need to see a picture ID. Either a state or school ID, please.
SC: <Pulls out a crumpled piece of paper that looks like a temporary driver’s license> I got this.
Me: I can’t do a buyback without a picture ID, sir.
SC: Yes you can.
Me: No, sir, I can’t.
SC: They did it last time!
Me: Who did, sir? Because it’s store policy here not to do a buyback transaction without a picture ID.
SC: They did it the other day!!
Me: Sir, I was the only one running buybacks the other day, and I don’t remember you.
SC: Then you’re lying. How come the policy changes in two days.
Me: Sir, that’s been the policy as long as I’ve been here. I’m sorry, I can’t help you.
SC: At least tell me what you would offer!
Me: I have to input an ID number in the computer to start a buyback sir, which I can’t do without a picture ID saying you’re you.
SC: You’re a lying bitch and I want your manager!
Me: <Turns to look at L, the textbook manager who’s desk is right behind the counter. And he’s sitting at it. I don’t even pretend to be diplomatic> L, tell him I can’t do a buyback without a picture ID.
SC: And tell her to stop being a bitch and show some customer service!!
L: Sir, if you call my employee that one more time, you’re gone. And she’s right. No picture ID, no buyback.
SC: But you did it the other day!
L: No, sir. It’s corporate policy. I can’t change the computer to do a buyback without an ID number, and we only take picture IDs, state or school.
SC: <Yanks two books out of his bag and slams them on the counter> At least LOOK at them and tell me if you’re interested in buying them!
L: <Without glancing at them> No sir, we’re not interested. You have a good night now.
SC: <Snarls something and storms out, after wishing us a blessed night in a sarcastic voice.>
It gets better. As I’m clearing down my stuff for the night, the cashier and floor girl told me he swore he’d be back because we did a buyback for him before with just the paper, and we were going to do it again, because it’s not right the policy suddenly changes, and it’s obviously because he’s black and I’m white. He didn’t pull the race card with me or L, but that’s obviously why we’re following store policy. It’s not like I want to keep my job or anything.
And it gets even better after that. I clock out and leave, and head to the bus stop. Lo and behold, guess who should be waiting for a bus at the same time? Yup, Mr. Douchewaffle himself. He immediately starts in on me again, and this time, I’m not on the clock. And the conversation took a nasty turn, but at least there were witnesses. I didn’t raise my voice once, but he ended up screaming at me.
SC: You got no idea how to run customer service!! <Snarlrantblargle>
Me: Sir, I can’t do anything about corporate policy! End of story.
SC: No way. I’m going back. And you WILL buy my books!
Me: Actually, sir, I don’t HAVE to buy your books. Books that in all likelihood are stolen and you’re just trying to sell for fast cash. You’re surprisingly defensive over something as simple as a picture ID.
SC: I showed you ID!
Me: You showed me a crumpled piece of paper, sir, that could have been found anywhere.
SC: It’s a temporary! They cut up my old one.
Me: Nope. In the state of Texas, when issued a temporary ID, they cut the top strip off of your old one for you to use as a picture ID WITH your temporary until you get your new one in the mail. Try another.
SC: <Takes a step towards me> You just didn’t want to help me because I’m black! I’m going to file a complaint! You can’t talk to me this way!
Me: No, sir, I didn’t want to help you because I wanted to keep my JOB. I have to follow store policy, and if I had a choice I wouldn’t have bought your books at all in the first place because I believe they’re stolen and you’re just after fast cash. And let me remind you, I’m NOT on the clock at my store, I’m not an employee, I’m not on company time. I’m just another woman at a bus stop, being harassed by a random stranger in front of witnesses. And to be perfectly honest, I’m feeling a little threatened here because you’re being overly aggressive, and you’re taking steps to invade my space. If this keeps up, sir, I WILL defend myself from any danger I perceive.
SC: <Finally clues in that there are other people around. Interestingly enough, 2 are male and they shift over to stand beside me/between us>
M1: (Male 1) I think that’s enough. You should probably leave before someone calls the police.
M2: (Male 2) <Doesn’t say anything, but pulls out his cell phone.>
M1: <To me> You catching the next bus, miss?
Me: If it’s a #2 route, yes. Not the #1 that runs by here.
M1: We’ll just wait and make sure the driver knows what’s going on, just in case.
Me: Sure. Thanks.
I got on the bus all right, and the two nice guys did make sure to let the driver know what was going on. Thankfully, the SC didn’t get on the same bus as me.
I know, I know, I did everything wrong, and I should’ve gone to a public place, ignored the guy and called campus police. I was upset and let my emotions get the best of me, which is a big no no, and I could have gotten hurt. I’ve been kicking myself ever since. But at the same time, I’m also kind of glad I got to tell a thief what I REALLY thought of his shadyness.
Oh, and I told K and L at work the next day that if a complaint was filed against me I wasn’t on company time, and that I had witnesses I didn’t start anything. I got some strange looks, and was forced to explain, but K told me not to worry about it. He knew the guy I was talking about and he had been in several times, and each time was refused service without proper ID, so everyone’s butt is covered, especially mine.
And I think that’s more than enough. Cripes this turned out WAAAY longer than I thought, even for me! If you made it to the end, I salute you!! And now, I go rest…
So, quick bit of info, we started buybacks this week, and have started prepping for next semester. As a result, we’ve roped off the textbook section, since we’re clearing down the shelves unloading books from fall, and stocking books for spring, with pallets and boxes everywhere. These notes are important. A good chunk of the SCs are from buybacks and people wanting fall books. Keep in mind today, (Friday) is the LAST day of fall classes. Finals are next week. The semester is pretty much over. Anyhoo, moving on.
Reefer Madness…Squared..
So yes, textbook section is roped off. But does this deter people? Oh no, instead we had this guy wander in with a skateboard, and reeking of sweet Mary Jane to the point that I smelled him coming. He walks to the textbook section, I ask if I can help him find anything, and he shakes his head and keeps walking. And keeps walking. And runs into the yellow rope. And keeps trying to walk.
Upon realize that he’s not getting any further, he stumbles back over to the textbook counter and demands to know why he can’t go look at books, and thus the following conversation ensues.
Me: I’m sorry, sir. We’re setting up for Spring, and have the section closed off for everyone’s safety.
Him: But why? I mean, there’s, like, weeks left in the semester. Why can’t I go look at books?
Me: Um, sir, actually, classes end this Friday. Finals are next week. And we only have a limited period of time to get set up for next term. If you still need a book for this semester, I can look it up in our computers, and get it for you.
Him: But why are there ropes?
Me: To let people know the textbook section is closed for now, sir.
Him: But why ropes?
<Rinse, Lather, Repeat for about 5 minutes>
Me: (But WHY is the Rum gone?!?! <mental snicker>) Do you need a book, sir?
Him: <Sulkily> No. I just wanted to look. I guess I have to take my business elsewhere. <And he shuffles off>
Me: Ok then…
Flattery will get you nowhere
Remember my respiratory infection? Well, I’m doing a LOT better, thankfully. Still kind of congested and coughing, but nowhere near as bad sounding/looking as I did right before Thanksgiving. Apparently, I don’t look well enough, as this sweet little douchepumpkin felt fit to inform me.
SC: <After witnessing me cough into my elbow while turned away from her> Are you all right.
Me: <customer service smile, firmly in place> Oh, I’m fine, thank you. How can I help you, ma’am?
SC: Because seriously, you look like you’re about to fall over. You really shouldn’t be at work, infecting your customers.
Me: …um…I’m not contagious, ma’am…
SC: Sure you’re not. You look like hell.
Me: …can I help you find something, or are you going to continue flattering me, ma’am?
SC: No need to be sarcastic! <Storms off in a huff>
Customer my ass, she bought nothing. Apparently her purpose in life is to inform people when they look like hell. Must be a tough job. Really. Not so much suck as a WTF moment, I guess…
Third Time’s the Charm…
As store policy states, I can’t give a buyback quote over the phone. There are too many variables that can go wrong; people can give me wrong book info, I quote a price, and then when they come in and find out the actual price is lower, shit hits the fan. So, we direct them to our website, which has a section where you can enter your info, print a buyback quote for your books and bring them in. The onus is all on the customer. Of course, this hasn’t stopped people from calling in and asking how much we were buying a book back for. This woman called THREE times, I think, hoping if she kept calling we’d tire of directing her to the website, and just give in. She has no idea how stubborn I am when people are bugging me while I’m manning the counter by myself, and have five people waiting in line.
First call
SC: Yes, I’d like to know how much you’re buying my book back for?
Me: I’m sorry, we don’t give quotes over the phone. If you go to our website, you can look it up under the sell books tab, and get a quote.
SC: Oh, well, I’m not at a computer. Can you look it up for me.
Me: Ma’am, I need the physical book in front of me to scan, and a picture ID before doing a buyback transaction on my computers. You need to go to our website.
SC: Fine, what is it?
Me: thisstore.com/mylocation
<click>
Ten minutes later:
SC: Your website’s down!! Just tell me how much you’ll buy my book back for.
Me: I’m sorry, ma’am, I can’t do that.
SC: Well, how am I supposed to know if I can’t get on a computer
Me: (if you can’t get on a computer, how do you know the site is down??) Well, ma’am, all I can offer is our website again. thisstore.com/mylocation
SC: <Huffs angrily> Fine!! <Click>
Two minutes after that…
Me: <Answers phone with opening spiel>
SC: You lied to me! There’s nowhere for me to get a quote!!
Me: (<sob> just leave me alone!!!) What seems to be your problem, ma’am?
SC: I went to the website! Thisotherstore.com/locationinanotherstate!!! And there’s no tab for me to sell back books!!
Me: …
SC: Hello?!?!
Me: <Represses the urge to beat my head on the counter> Ma’am, the site is THISSTORE.com/MYLOCATION
SC: …oh… <click>
After about half an hour, I stopped wincing whenever the phone rang. Here’s hoping she figures it out and comes in when I’m not here!!!
Wherein I Discover An Exchange Student from Nunavut…
Customer comes into the store with someone I assume is a parent. Now, we recently received some t-shirts and hoodies in green camo. Dark forest green. Ok looking, compared to some past mishaps in clothing and spirit gear we’ve had, but not something I’d willingly spend money on. Now, if it was a gift and I haven’t done laundry in six months and it was my absolute last article of clean clothing and I had no Febreze to fake it with my other clothing, I’d wear it. Maybe.
So, these two females are prowling the store. Grabbing gads of merchandise, and being general nuisances, demanding we let them try stuff on, and if the size is wrong, I have to go fetch another size, and complaining the mirror is to small, the light isn’t bright enough, the selection is too big, but at the same time, it’s too small, and ooh, look, shiny!!!! All over the place. I finally manage to extricate myself from the tangle by mentioning I have to go back to my textbook section, and oh look, my co-worker knows more about the clothing than I do! I freely admit I threw her to the wolves and fled.
After another 15-20 minutes of inarticulate grunts and squeals as they roam the store, the girl SC spots the camo hoodies and t-shirts. And POUNCES!
SC: Look, look, they have CAMO!! Omg, isn’t it keeeewwwwwwwwt!?!?!
Me: <Resists the urge to dive behind the counter and hide in terror at the shrill squealing>
SCM: (SC’s mom) It’s too boyish looking. You wouldn’t look cute in it.
SC: True. Maybe if they had it in pink!
Me: <CRINGE!!!>
SC: I’ll ask. Hey, you!
Me: <Glances around and realizes CW has fled to the back room and I’m the only one on the floor. CRAP!!> Er…yes…?
SC: Do you make this in pink camo?
Me: Um, no. Sorry. That’s the only style we have like that.
SC: You need it in pink!! For the GIRLS!!
Me: I’ll…pass that on to my boss…
SC: Good. Well, maybe I can cut it up and make it cute and girly…<Goes back to perusing the camo>
SCM: <Raises her head and looks at me. Crap! Caught in her sights!> Where are your pants??
Me: <Double CRINGE!!> Um. We don’t carry pants. Usually just tops; t-shirts, hoodies, tanks, that kind of thing. Sometimes athletic shorts.
SCM: <Looks like I just devoured her firstborn’s soul and quite literally bellows> HOW CAN YOU NOT HAVE PANTS!?!?!
Me:
er…SCM: <Goes into a rant about needing pants, wanting pants, something about pants pants pants…>
Me: Ok…
SCM: <As my CW finally emerges from the back room, she dumps the entire load of stuff she and her daughter had been carrying around on my textbook counter> We came for pants!! We can’t buy this stuff without pants!
Me: …
SCM: We’re going to the other store. THEY’LL have pants!!
Me: <decides it’s best not to talk or draw any further attention to myself. If I pretend I’m invisible, they can’t see me…>
SCM: <leaves, followed by SC>
CW:<Comes up to the counter, and starts sorting through the merchandise, so it can be re-shelved>…What was THAT all about…?
Me: They’ve learned to migrate south for the winter…
CW:
Me: Nevermind…
And your point is…?
I loathe buybacks. Mostly because we offer decent prices if we’re using the book next semester, but it’s never enough. Students can’t grasp the concept of depreciation of value. And hell, I don’t set the prices!! I can’t change them. Screaming at me that you paid so much for the books isn’t going to make me decide to change the rules just for you and essentially give you a full refund because you’re speshul. Sorry, cupcake, it doesn’t work that way. Two such incidents stand out in my mind.
#1
Girl sells back two books. We offer $152. And she throws a hissy fit. Why? Because she paid $225 for them!!!!!!11!!!!! Lady, do the math!!! We’re giving you over 60% of the price back!!! And that’s 60% of the NEW price!!! Your books have used stickers, so I very much doubt you paid new price for them!! Fine, refuse the buyback. I’ll see you next week when the price drops down to $75, and I will RELISH that $70 idiot tax. I will clutch it tightly to myself, and hoard the happy feeling it gives me to see your shocked look when I inform you that as our inventory goes up, the buyback price goes down, and in the week since you’ve been here, people have sold the books back. That’s what sucks about being the off campus store, sunshine!! We buy for more than one school!! And one school alone has 35,000+ students. Nanny nanny boo boo!
<Ahem> moving on…
#2
Another girl comes in with a book. We’re not using it in our store, but it’s a corporate title, meaning another store in our company has it on a want list. As such, we offer more for it, than if it was wholesale and going to a warehouse. We offered $19 for it. She starts screaming that she spent $100 on it, and we’re always trying to cheat poor, hard-working students, and she’s not going to stand for it, etc, etc. I don’t know why people think I’m gullible and without resources. I press two buttons on the keyboard. I discover the retail price of the book is $52 new. She had a used copy, which retails at $45-ish. So, she was getting almost 50%.
Lady, if you spent $100 on it, then you got robbed. And if you really want to throw money away, at least give it to a good cause. I’m standing right here!!!!
I’m forever branded…
Another day, another buyback. Guy comes up.
SC: Hey, you look kind of familiar.
Me: Well, I do work here a lot. I don’t think you and I have had a class together, though I could be wrong.
SC: Nah, that’s not it. Hey!! You’re the Plinko chick!!
Me: >.< (Oh gods, memory flashback! Scary mental place, scary mental place!!!) Oh. Yes. Yes I was…
SC: So, any scratch offs or deals for me today?
Me: Nope.
SC: Aw, c’mon, I played Plinko!!
Me: (And the funny thing is, you think this endears you to me. Ha. ) I’m sorry, sir, any promotions went out via snail mail or email. Even text message. We don’t have any in store items this time.
SC: Well, you suck, then, don’t you?
Me: o.0 Er…k…
SC: If you have nothing for me, I have nothing for you! <Scoops up his books and leaves>
Me: <To my CW standing next to me, in a deadpan voice> Stop. No. come back. However will I survive now?
CW:
In which I finally lose my temper with an SC
I’d been having a particularly bad day Wednesday. I was just wanting my shift to be over, it’d gotten colder, and it was making my breathing difficult and my coughing was a little worse. I just wanted to go home, drink tea, and go to sleep. Enter Mr. Douchewaffle. I knew right away he was one of those guys who I can’t prove is a thief, but he’s going to try to sell books anyway. It started going downhill immediately, as soon as he came to my counter. I freely admit the politeness was turned off on my part, but he started out a douche and got progressively worse.
SC: Hey, I got some books to sell.
Me: All right, sir, I need to see a picture ID. Either a state or school ID, please.
SC: <Pulls out a crumpled piece of paper that looks like a temporary driver’s license> I got this.
Me: I can’t do a buyback without a picture ID, sir.
SC: Yes you can.
Me: No, sir, I can’t.
SC: They did it last time!
Me: Who did, sir? Because it’s store policy here not to do a buyback transaction without a picture ID.
SC: They did it the other day!!
Me: Sir, I was the only one running buybacks the other day, and I don’t remember you.
SC: Then you’re lying. How come the policy changes in two days.
Me: Sir, that’s been the policy as long as I’ve been here. I’m sorry, I can’t help you.
SC: At least tell me what you would offer!
Me: I have to input an ID number in the computer to start a buyback sir, which I can’t do without a picture ID saying you’re you.
SC: You’re a lying bitch and I want your manager!
Me: <Turns to look at L, the textbook manager who’s desk is right behind the counter. And he’s sitting at it. I don’t even pretend to be diplomatic> L, tell him I can’t do a buyback without a picture ID.
SC: And tell her to stop being a bitch and show some customer service!!
L: Sir, if you call my employee that one more time, you’re gone. And she’s right. No picture ID, no buyback.
SC: But you did it the other day!
L: No, sir. It’s corporate policy. I can’t change the computer to do a buyback without an ID number, and we only take picture IDs, state or school.
SC: <Yanks two books out of his bag and slams them on the counter> At least LOOK at them and tell me if you’re interested in buying them!
L: <Without glancing at them> No sir, we’re not interested. You have a good night now.
SC: <Snarls something and storms out, after wishing us a blessed night in a sarcastic voice.>
It gets better. As I’m clearing down my stuff for the night, the cashier and floor girl told me he swore he’d be back because we did a buyback for him before with just the paper, and we were going to do it again, because it’s not right the policy suddenly changes, and it’s obviously because he’s black and I’m white. He didn’t pull the race card with me or L, but that’s obviously why we’re following store policy. It’s not like I want to keep my job or anything.
And it gets even better after that. I clock out and leave, and head to the bus stop. Lo and behold, guess who should be waiting for a bus at the same time? Yup, Mr. Douchewaffle himself. He immediately starts in on me again, and this time, I’m not on the clock. And the conversation took a nasty turn, but at least there were witnesses. I didn’t raise my voice once, but he ended up screaming at me.
SC: You got no idea how to run customer service!! <Snarlrantblargle>
Me: Sir, I can’t do anything about corporate policy! End of story.
SC: No way. I’m going back. And you WILL buy my books!
Me: Actually, sir, I don’t HAVE to buy your books. Books that in all likelihood are stolen and you’re just trying to sell for fast cash. You’re surprisingly defensive over something as simple as a picture ID.
SC: I showed you ID!
Me: You showed me a crumpled piece of paper, sir, that could have been found anywhere.
SC: It’s a temporary! They cut up my old one.
Me: Nope. In the state of Texas, when issued a temporary ID, they cut the top strip off of your old one for you to use as a picture ID WITH your temporary until you get your new one in the mail. Try another.
SC: <Takes a step towards me> You just didn’t want to help me because I’m black! I’m going to file a complaint! You can’t talk to me this way!
Me: No, sir, I didn’t want to help you because I wanted to keep my JOB. I have to follow store policy, and if I had a choice I wouldn’t have bought your books at all in the first place because I believe they’re stolen and you’re just after fast cash. And let me remind you, I’m NOT on the clock at my store, I’m not an employee, I’m not on company time. I’m just another woman at a bus stop, being harassed by a random stranger in front of witnesses. And to be perfectly honest, I’m feeling a little threatened here because you’re being overly aggressive, and you’re taking steps to invade my space. If this keeps up, sir, I WILL defend myself from any danger I perceive.
SC: <Finally clues in that there are other people around. Interestingly enough, 2 are male and they shift over to stand beside me/between us>
M1: (Male 1) I think that’s enough. You should probably leave before someone calls the police.
M2: (Male 2) <Doesn’t say anything, but pulls out his cell phone.>
M1: <To me> You catching the next bus, miss?
Me: If it’s a #2 route, yes. Not the #1 that runs by here.
M1: We’ll just wait and make sure the driver knows what’s going on, just in case.
Me: Sure. Thanks.
I got on the bus all right, and the two nice guys did make sure to let the driver know what was going on. Thankfully, the SC didn’t get on the same bus as me.
I know, I know, I did everything wrong, and I should’ve gone to a public place, ignored the guy and called campus police. I was upset and let my emotions get the best of me, which is a big no no, and I could have gotten hurt. I’ve been kicking myself ever since. But at the same time, I’m also kind of glad I got to tell a thief what I REALLY thought of his shadyness.
Oh, and I told K and L at work the next day that if a complaint was filed against me I wasn’t on company time, and that I had witnesses I didn’t start anything. I got some strange looks, and was forced to explain, but K told me not to worry about it. He knew the guy I was talking about and he had been in several times, and each time was refused service without proper ID, so everyone’s butt is covered, especially mine.
And I think that’s more than enough. Cripes this turned out WAAAY longer than I thought, even for me! If you made it to the end, I salute you!! And now, I go rest…
, 
, or 
are enough.
look. my reply is a similar look, to which i convey, "No, i don't want to touch your snotty tissue with my bare hands."
lulz!! i so wish my CWs got my CS quotes and references
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