Tales From the Crypt (AKA The Bathroom)

[BrassCowboy]

I was kinda loitering around work the other day, as I usually do, when a young lady approached me and asked if I could unlock the door to the ladies restroom.

"Our bathrooms dont need keys to get in," says I.
"But it's locked," says she.
"That means that there is someone in there" says I.
"No. When I knocked, nobody answered," says she.

Well, I page a manager and depict the tale to her.

"***long pause***What?"

I repeat the tale once more and ask her if she could find some keys to unlock the doors. She does and I assume all will be well.

It wasn't.

My manager approches me 20 minutes later to tell me what happened:
She knocked on the door, and although she heard voices from inside, nobocdy would directly answer her. Finally, at almost the same time, a young boy exits the mens room, and a tall, burly, tattooed gentleman exits the womans room. My manager looks up to the burly man and says:

"Sir - that was the ladies room. That *pointing* is the mens room."
"Oh" says he and proceeds to then walk into the mens room for another 'go at it.' (wink, wink, nudge, nudge)

About an hour later we see this man leave the store hobbling, yes hobbling.

We all laughed and wondered what his deal was; you know, using two restrooms for extended periods of time and not buying anything, then hobbling out uncomfortably. Ultimately, the newb working with us had to clean the bathrooms that night and he told us that there was some big puddle on the floor near the toilet of each bathroom. Gross? Yes.

BTW, the young lady who intially asked me about using the latrine mysteriously disappeared before the manager arrived with the keys.

Such a strange day.

[Becks]

"Our bathrooms dont need keys to get in," says I.
"But it's locked," says she.
"That means that there is someone in there" says I.
"No. When I knocked, nobody answered," says she.

I don't know about others, but when I'm in the bathroom, I don't tend to talk. If the door doesn't open, it's locked and someone is in there. Damn.

[powerboy]

I don't know about others, but when I'm in the bathroom, I don't tend to talk. If the door doesn't open, it's locked and someone is in there. Damn.

Same here. If I am using the bathroom, then I will not answer.

[AFpheonix]

I will, if it's some twit trying to force the damn door open

[Lace Neil Singer]

I will, if it's some twit trying to force the damn door open

Same here, using a colourful selection of cuss words.

[MadMike]

I will, if it's some twit trying to force the damn door open

I really hate being in one with stalls that don't lock. The one at the local skating rink is like that. I was in there one time, and the guy knocked on the door to see if anyone was in there, and then about 0.0001 seconds later started pushing on it. When he realized it was occupied he said, "Well, I knocked to see if anyone was in there!" Yeah, that's great, but it would have been even better if you would have given me a second to answer!

Dumbass.

[Dreamstalker]

In Japan, they have the right idea. Knock on a stall door first to see if it's occupied. If it is, the occupant is supposed to knock back.

Obviously this wouldn't work in "full-size" bathrooms. A bookstore downtown has door locks like airplane lavs; the little sign in a cutout on the outside surface of the door will read "occupied" in red when the door is locked.

[Sofar]

I really hate being in one with stalls that don't lock. The one at the local skating rink is like that. I was in there one time, and the guy knocked on the door to see if anyone was in there, and then about 0.0001 seconds later started pushing on it.

That happens to me frequently, and no one ever knocks before they push on the door for some reason. I always just act as though nothing happened. I sit there, reading my newspaper, and I say nothing. Every time, the intruder slowly closes the door and backs out of the bathroom. If I say something they just apologize and move on to the next stall, but the silence creeps them out.

[Dips]

In Japan, they have the right idea. Knock on a stall door first to see if it's occupied. If it is, the occupant is supposed to knock back.

My freshman year in college I had a Japanese roomate. The first time I saw her knock on a stall door I was startled. Then I realized how much more sense that makes than peeking under the door for feet or just trying the door and possibly disturbing someone.

I do it all the time now when I can't tell for sure if a stall/bathroom is occupied. Just a polite little tap, a pause to give anyone inside a chance to answer and then I push on the door. It saves embarassment AND time.

[Dreamstalker]

Yeah, I always feel like a perv when peeking under stall doors/walls for feet. I get odd looks sometimes when I tap on stall doors (ok, you can be the one to walk in on someone).

It could get awkward if the occupant doesn't know they're expected to tap back/say something though.

A public restroom in a shopping area downtown has the weirdest layout...the doors open outwards. It's a quite narrow area, with sinks directly opposite the stalls, so it can get interesting at times when it's full of people (this is the one where the stall doors keep getting stolen).

I have a feeling that there was never intended to be a restroom there and the owners only did so hastily to comply with the accessible public restrooms bylaw. No handicapped access whatsoever to boot.

[Dips]

Yeah, I always feel like a perv when peeking under stall doors/walls for feet. I get odd looks sometimes when I tap on stall doors (ok, you can be the one to walk in on someone).

It could get awkward if the occupant doesn't know they're expected to tap back/say something though.

It works pretty well. There are only four possible outcomes.

1. Nobody is there. I go in.

2. Somebody answers (I've never had anyone knock back yet). I wait.

3. Nobody answers. I try door. Find it locked. I wait.

4. Nobody answers. I try door. Find it unlocked and an occupant. I apologize that I didn't hear them answer my knock and slink away in embarassment.

In the 20-odd years I've been knocking, #4 has happened only once.

Before I started knocking I'd play the guessing game in my brain. "Is somebody in there? Should I try the door now or wait? What if somebody is in there and the lock doesn't work? Should I wait a little longer just to be sure?" And I guessed wrong often.