Oh my god, its $2, you effing cheapskate.

[elysia]

Customer, some white gangster wannabe about 25ish walks in with a sidekick in tow and a stack of papers.

SC: Hi how much to mail this?
Me: (weighs it) With the envelope I think it would be about $2.00.
SC: FOR SOME LITTLE PAPERS?!?!?! 1eleventy!1!
Me: Uh.... yeah.
Sidekick: *chuckle*
SC: Well can you tell me exactly how much?
Me: *rings in the envelope and postage on the register* "$1.97."
SC: Why is it so much?
Me: .... Well, the postage is $1.65 for that weight and the envelope is thirty cents. *point to a manila envelope*
SC: Thirty cents for an envelope? Cant I just use one of the little white ones? How much are those?
Me: Well, they are 10 cents for a single but I'm not sure you could fit all those papers in one.
SC: Oh yeah I can gimme an envelope.
Me: *shrugs and hands him one*

He then proceeds to try and fold 20+ papers into thirds and cram them into the envelope. After about 45 seconds an epic fail occurs and the envelope rips. He decides not to recognize defeat and asks for tape. I oblige, mostly because I want to see just how stupid he is and how far he will take it. The friend stands over by the card rack guffawing.

SC: I guess its not going to work. But do you have any cheaper ones than this?
Me: No.
SC: *sighs loudly and opens his wallet, which is stuffed with twenties. He shuffles through them.* K I guess I'll buy the big one then. How much did you say again?
Me: Two eleven please.
SC: WHAT WHY IS IT MORE NOW?
Me: Ten cents for the envelope you ripped.
SC: Whatever. Jesus Christ. God I only have twenties. I dont want to break a twenty! (to sidekick) Hey can I borrow a few bucks from you?
Sidekick: Seriously dude? I guess. *gives him a couple ones*
SC: You got eleven cents?
Sidekick: No change dude sorry.
Me: Dont worry about it.
SC: Huh?
Me: Yeah I got it covered youre good.
SC: Trying to get rid of me huh?
Me: Yes.

And thanks for taking up 5 mins of my time for an encounter that should have taken 30 seconds at most. Why don't you go sell some more drugs or break into some more cars or ask mommy and daddy for some more money or whatever fashion you make a living because I'm willing to bet its not customer service. Oh and you look like an idiot with your hat on sideways.

[Wade]

Yeah, I love when Eminems and Vanilla Ices act like such high-rollers when they're really just scrimping welfare money or mommy's allowance for meth.

[Summerfly413]

Wow..The whole time I was reading that, I thought you meant Sidekick, as in the PDA(or whatever it is..)
I was wondering why it chuckled hahaha

Yeah...$2.00 isn't anything. No need to freak out over it.

[Bright_Star]

People like that think they're all high & mighty cause they got a ton of money stuffed in their wallets & love to show it off but when it comes to actually spending it then that's when they have a hissy fit.

[MoonChild2007]

SC: Trying to get rid of me huh?
Me: Yes.

Did you actually say that to the customer or was that wishful thinking?

[StanFlouride]

I would have never let him off the 10 cents. I frequently cut people slack on a few pennies but I would consider my duty to every other cashier to keep this twit from blossoming into full EW-hood.

[Peppergirl]

I love the fact that the buddy was laughing at him.

Usually the SC's travel in packs, and the friend is as big or bigger of an asshole then the original SC.

[NightWatch]

Yeah, I love when Eminems and Vanilla Ices act like such high-rollers when they're really just scrimping welfare money or mommy's allowance for meth.

Oh I live mixing M&M's in Vanilla icecream!! Yes, this is the first place my mind went to.

[dougall]

Maybe the wad of cash didn't belong to him

[BookstoreEscapee]

I love the fact that the buddy was laughing at him.

I would have laughed, too. I wouldn't have given him the money, though. If I knew he had a wallet full of twenties I'd have told him tough luck, break one.

On second thought, if I were his buddy I'd have been outside pretending I didn't know him...

[ShinyKitsune]

Wow..The whole time I was reading that, I thought you meant Sidekick, as in the PDA(or whatever it is..)
I was wondering why it chuckled hahaha

Because he was that dumb and cheap! If I were a PDA, I wouldn't want to be caught dead with that guy.

[Hobbs]

Customer, some white gangster wannabe about 25ish walks in with a sidekick in tow and a stack of papers.

I believe the term is 'wangster.' There's another word, but I don't wanna get modded again.

[protege]

Oh and you look like an idiot with your hat on sideways.

It would have been hard for me *not* to say "pull your damn pants up, and turn your hat around. You look like a moron"

[Rapscallion]

I believe the term is 'wangster.'

That term's a new one on me, but it's hilarious!

Rapscallion

[evilhomer]

I would have never let him off the 10 cents. I frequently cut people slack on a few pennies but I would consider my duty to every other cashier to keep this twit from blossoming into full EW-hood.

I'd say that directly telling him that you're trying to get rid of him will let him know what kind of assclown he is. Of course, there's the possibility that he'll think that being even worse will get him more freebies, but I don't think that would be the case here. His buddy was already laughing at him and I'm sure he'll be riding him with it later on. Maybe a little light bulb, however dim, might go turn on.


Off topic: I never allow any wangstas or gangstas on my job sites. I've actually used that exact "pull you pants up and put you hat on straight, you look like an idiot" line many times. It's not until I repeat "put your f'n hat on straight or get off the job site" that they realize I'm not joking.