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Yay! Story 2! This also happened in the morning, at the drive-thru. It occurred to me a while ago that people will be complete and total turnip heads at the drive through because they think that I’m just some random guy who they will never have to see again, completely unaware that I am either
a) Going to be the one taking your money
b) Going to be the one making your drink/getting your food
c) Going to be at the window anyway since our expiditing screen is directly across from the cash register!
So, it’s about…8:30 in the morning, and back then (probably one and a half years ago) this was around the time our morning rush was dying down enough to let people go on lunch, go home, etc. We’d been open for 3 and a half hours by now and had gotten WELL over 200 people so far. Keep this in mind as you read this delightful exchange:
Me- Yours cruelly
SC-Stupid scone woman in the guise of a kindly old lady. Yeah, I’ve learned to look past that little smoke screen…
Me: Good morning, welcome to <coffee shop> my name is Morningchaser, how can I help you?
SC: Yes I’d like a hot chocolate, and do you have any blueberry scones?
(This was back when we couldn’t hold on to blueberry scones or cheese danish to save our lives! We’d order about 16, which is a crap ton compared to everything else we ordered, and they’d all be gone in no time. I believe that day they were getting ordered 2 and sometimes 6 at a time)
Me: Oh, I’m sorry, we’re all out of blueberry. We do on the other hand have cranberry orange, pumpkin, and maple.
SC: Oh, no no no…do you have blueberry muffins?
Me: We’re out of the regular, but we do have the reduced fat (which, IMHO, are A LOT better than the regular).
SC: <Composure roll-FAIL> What?! This…this is just unacceptable! Both of those are on your menu! This is false advertising!
Me: (I’ve been waiting FOREVER for someone to use that excuse) Sorry ma’am, but it’s not false advertising, we just sold out. (Supply and Demand. Basis of our economy? Familiar with it? Buddy? Fella? Guy?!)
SC: I come here at the same time EVERY DAY and you’re always sold out of what I want!
Me: (thinking) Well then, maybe you should come in EARLIER! Our rush starts between 6 and 7, it is now 8:30. And you DON’T come in every day, we know the people who come in every day. (now speaking) Sorry, but as I said, we do have every other type of scone and we also have the reduced fat blueberry muffin.
SC: No! Those are disgusting! Are you new?! (The magic words to flip my switch, every time!) I’m coming up, I’m sick of talking to you! You don’t know anything!
Me: Must…not…beat…the elderly….
So, the delightful old harpy comes up to the window and starts asking Cindy (name changed) about what we have, and complaining about how we never have ANYTHING and blah blah blah blah, the entire time I’m taking other orders and glaring at her sideways from my post. I see them hand out her drink and then a pastry bag, and then of course my inner masochist gets the better of me:
Me: What did you just giver her.
Cindy: You don’t wanna’ know….
Me: No…no….don’t tell me *takes a deep breath* Okay…tell me.
Cindy: Low fat blueberry muffin.
a) Going to be the one taking your money
b) Going to be the one making your drink/getting your food
c) Going to be at the window anyway since our expiditing screen is directly across from the cash register!
So, it’s about…8:30 in the morning, and back then (probably one and a half years ago) this was around the time our morning rush was dying down enough to let people go on lunch, go home, etc. We’d been open for 3 and a half hours by now and had gotten WELL over 200 people so far. Keep this in mind as you read this delightful exchange:
Me- Yours cruelly
SC-Stupid scone woman in the guise of a kindly old lady. Yeah, I’ve learned to look past that little smoke screen…
Me: Good morning, welcome to <coffee shop> my name is Morningchaser, how can I help you?
SC: Yes I’d like a hot chocolate, and do you have any blueberry scones?
(This was back when we couldn’t hold on to blueberry scones or cheese danish to save our lives! We’d order about 16, which is a crap ton compared to everything else we ordered, and they’d all be gone in no time. I believe that day they were getting ordered 2 and sometimes 6 at a time)
Me: Oh, I’m sorry, we’re all out of blueberry. We do on the other hand have cranberry orange, pumpkin, and maple.
SC: Oh, no no no…do you have blueberry muffins?
Me: We’re out of the regular, but we do have the reduced fat (which, IMHO, are A LOT better than the regular).
SC: <Composure roll-FAIL> What?! This…this is just unacceptable! Both of those are on your menu! This is false advertising!
Me: (I’ve been waiting FOREVER for someone to use that excuse) Sorry ma’am, but it’s not false advertising, we just sold out. (Supply and Demand. Basis of our economy? Familiar with it? Buddy? Fella? Guy?!)
SC: I come here at the same time EVERY DAY and you’re always sold out of what I want!
Me: (thinking) Well then, maybe you should come in EARLIER! Our rush starts between 6 and 7, it is now 8:30. And you DON’T come in every day, we know the people who come in every day. (now speaking) Sorry, but as I said, we do have every other type of scone and we also have the reduced fat blueberry muffin.
SC: No! Those are disgusting! Are you new?! (The magic words to flip my switch, every time!) I’m coming up, I’m sick of talking to you! You don’t know anything!
Me: Must…not…beat…the elderly….
So, the delightful old harpy comes up to the window and starts asking Cindy (name changed) about what we have, and complaining about how we never have ANYTHING and blah blah blah blah, the entire time I’m taking other orders and glaring at her sideways from my post. I see them hand out her drink and then a pastry bag, and then of course my inner masochist gets the better of me:
Me: What did you just giver her.
Cindy: You don’t wanna’ know….
Me: No…no….don’t tell me *takes a deep breath* Okay…tell me.
Cindy: Low fat blueberry muffin.
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