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God, why do these repressed memories keep jumping into my head? First it was the God-forsaken mortgage industry, then I think back to when I was 17 (I'm 34, now) and had this asshole to deal with while employed at a local bowling alley:
Me: Oy.
SC: Inbred abortion of white trash intellect who apparently hasn't shaved, bathed, or done laundry since 1973
Cut to our hero (that's me!) walking about the establishment, performing his duties of trash and end-of-evening cleanup....
SC: Hey! How much is it per game?
Me: It's 89 cents per person, per game.
SC: Then why is my bill over fifty bucks?
Me: Because each person counts as one game, plus you drank six pitchers of beer (remember this was 1991)
SC: I ain't fuk'n stoo-pid.
And without missing a beat, I furrowed my eyebrow, stared him dead in the eye, and responded:
Me: I didn't say you were!
...before turning on my heels and curtly walking away. Fuck him. Want to know why your bill is so high? Because you haven't even the base mathematical skills to comprehend that paper in your wallet is MONEY, and anything you want in this life will result in less of that magical paper that actually has uses beyond your portable cocaine straw!
Idiot.
Me: Oy.
SC: Inbred abortion of white trash intellect who apparently hasn't shaved, bathed, or done laundry since 1973
Cut to our hero (that's me!) walking about the establishment, performing his duties of trash and end-of-evening cleanup....
SC: Hey! How much is it per game?
Me: It's 89 cents per person, per game.
SC: Then why is my bill over fifty bucks?
Me: Because each person counts as one game, plus you drank six pitchers of beer (remember this was 1991)
SC: I ain't fuk'n stoo-pid.
And without missing a beat, I furrowed my eyebrow, stared him dead in the eye, and responded:
Me: I didn't say you were!
...before turning on my heels and curtly walking away. Fuck him. Want to know why your bill is so high? Because you haven't even the base mathematical skills to comprehend that paper in your wallet is MONEY, and anything you want in this life will result in less of that magical paper that actually has uses beyond your portable cocaine straw!
Idiot.