Seriously....

[Red_Dazes]

...Ah the word.... I swear on all that is holy if I hear it one more time I am going to go APE SHIT.... The word... is 'Seriously"..... I have heard this word at least 10 times every hour of my 7 hour shift today........Most of these times directed at me....

....You see..... our bathroom was closed today..... some dick head decided that it would be cool to flush paper towels. Well. ITS FUCKING NOT! I mean really! Why does this even cross your warped insignificant little raisin of a mind? Do you flush paper towels down the toilet at your house!? NO? Well then why is is OKAY TO DO HERE!!!!!........Anyway... ...so the bathroom was closed.
This meaning I had to tell....every single person who had the urge to tinkle that "Sorry... The Restroom is Temporarily out of Service"..... Just like it says on the SIGN!!! It's hanging on the door for CHRIST'S Sake.....but no one has the mental capacity to read these things.... So all day I had to repeat the same thing... over and over and over.... but the really annoying part was that every time I said it the response was....

"Seriously?" *OH GOD NO! I Was just kidding! Gotcha! Early April fools! You got me! I was just pulling your leg! Go on in and pop a squat!*
And of course you know there is always the person who does the IM speak.... you know they say "Seriously"....but you can tell... just by how they say it that it is "SRLSY?" GOD! It makes me cringe. it's right up there with using 'OMG' or "rofl" in a real life scenario...

My Favorite bathroom "Seriously" of the night was this.

Me: Sorry but the bathroom is out of service today.
SC: Seriously?
Me: Yeah. But rite aid next door has one.
SC: Seriously?
Me:.... Yes. I'm sorry for the inconvenience... but it is not working.
SC:..... ((staring angerly at me... If i recall the look it is the same one I use when trying to make peoples heads explode with my mind... Luckily for me My head is slpody proof!))
MeAfter long awkward silence filled with glowering)Is there anything else I can help you with?
SC: GOD! Whatever! (walks away with one hand flung up into the air)

ooookkkkayy.....

But that's not all.... I also was accosted with this word During the rest of the day!
allow me to demonstrate.
Manager: "Red, I need you to close your line ((At this point I'm on register)) and go to lunch. Your about 5 min from going over your 5hours...."
ME: Sorry ma'am. If you would just step over to the other side here, she can help you... I have to close.
SC(Who was standing there when manager came to speak to me and then decided to hop into my line....cause it was shorter): Seriously?
Me:.................... yeah........
SC: Whatev.



And of course there is always the bathing suite issue.....
Me: Sorry but the two piece bottoms cannot go back to the fitting room
SC: Seriously?
Me:...... Yeah..... It's company policy.
SC: Seriously?!

><CHANGING HOW YOU SAY IT IS NOT GOING TO MAKE ME CHANGE MY MIND DAMNIT!!!! JUST STOP ASKING ME IF I"M SERIOUS! I'M PRETTY FUCKING SERIOUS!


Sucky Customer in Training

Me: Sorry ma'am, but I cant allow the two piece bottoms back to the fitting room.
SC: Are you Kidding me?!
Me(YES! Gotcha! ARG!)) No Ma'am, it's company policy, the two piece bottoms have to remain out here.
SC: Then how do I know if they fit?!
Me: No Idea. It's strange, I understand, but that's the policy and I have to keep to it.
SC: So...what about the regular bathing suits... can I try those on.
ME: Yes.
SC:.....But not the two piece.....
Me(Wow! You're brilliant! Just catching on are we?)) Yes. Thats right.
SC: Why Cant I try the bottoms! ITS NOT DIFFERENT!
Me: <blah blah blah about health codes and "underwear" etc>
SC: So what! You want me to stand out here in my UNDERWEAR AND TRY THEM ON IN FRONT OF YOU?!
ME:.............. uh....... I... don't think that would be very appropriate.... ((Where did you get that from!! help!))
SC: This is ridiculous! ((she is turning a lovely color of red at this point)) I Want to speak to your manager young lady!
Me: Okay. ^_^

I pawn her off on Ca____ and get to stand and listen to her become more and more irate. "THIS young lady" she pointed her finger at me... you know the one... not looking at me just accusing me. "Told me that I can try on the one piece bathing suits but I have to leave the BOTTOMS of the two piece out here!"

Ca____ "That's correct" At this point the lady stops... because you know... I'm not getting in trouble for being an inconvenience or anything.... in fact my manager is siding with me.... A Novel idea! But She cant be over come.
"BUT THAT"S RIDICULOUS!"
Ca___ "Yes I understand. But It is company policy. an-"
"WHO buys bathing suits with out trying them on!"
Ca____ "We actually make alot of bathing suit sales"
"WOULD YOU BUY A BATHING SUIT YOU COULDNT TRY ON?!"
Ca____ "I do all my bathing suit shopping here in fact... and I cant try them on either."
"This is just F'ing rediculous. Just F'ing stupid"

...this is where I almost lost it.... because... well... I have not heard... at least not when there is an angry tirade going on anyone use the term F'ing..... not Fucking.... F'ing..... I had to try not to laugh.. COME ON! If your gonna drop the F bomb.... do it properly... you cant just half ass it. It makes you look ridiculous. ...But wait... there's more. After a few more words are exchanged she decides "Fine I dont want to try them on then" and attempts what should have been an angry violent throw of the bathing suits onto my table..... however.... since she doesnt quite have her SC big girl pants yet... it ended up being a half toss that looked silly.... cause you could tell she was mad and wanted it to be,..... BIGGER!

People are silly.... Specially this guy!


And You Are How Old????

not a SC... just...an.... interesting one...

One of my last bathroom customers of the night... was a guy of about 40... I'm guessing.... he walked back to the restrooms... looked at the door.((WITH THE SIGN!! READ THE SIGN!)) Looked at me.... looked at the door.... looked back to me... and said.... And I quote.

"I Must Make Pee Pee"

I almost choked.... I dont know on what... but I almost did. But I managed out a meek "I'm sorry it's out of service"

He says "Uhoh. Well thats not working for me."

OH MY GOD!!! Oh My GOD! are you for reals? Where is the camera crew! But no... no. You are just.... what... Digressing in the age of your brain. I must make pee pee.... jesus... My nieces and nephews stopped saying that when they were 5.
I sent him to rite aid... and as soon as he left I went back into the womens fitting room and laughed till I cried.... It just struck me......

Ohhhh!!! You Know Law! ME TOO!
This one is short and simple....

Me:Sorry the bathroom is out of order
SC:You know! I Should report you! It's Illegal not to have a bathroom in your place of business!
Me(oh noos!!! he Knows the LAW!)) Yes, It is illegal not to have a bathroom in your place of business for your employees to use. However, Not having a bathroom for your customers is an inconvenience... but not illegal.
SC:...............*look of utter confusion. Makes some angry noise that may have been an attempt at a come back and walks away*
Me: *quietly to myself* hehe... I win.

The Finale

The icing on my cake tonight though.... was as I was getting ready to leave after the store had closed.... there were these guys... lingering out side... drunk as fuck.... and when we walked towards the door... they started shaking and banging on it "Let us in bitches!" "We got good money!" "Open the FUCK up"
Now I parked all the way out in the BFE... ((thats Bum fuck Egypt for all confused)) and I was NOT walking out there with them.... so... I ended up staying late... an extra half hour before they left..... ... I dont like staying late....I cant drive well in the dark...


*sigh* I'm going to bed........enjoy

[Supermarket Slave Girl]

I hear ya, customers can be such a pain in the arse,,,,,Seriously


Hehe ducks and hides

please don't hurt me.

[Red_Dazes]

I hear ya, customers can be such a pain in the arse,,,,,Seriously


Hehe ducks and hides

please don't hurt me.

hehe...^_^ It's okay! I'll not harm one of my fellow work slaves. ... only those who attempt to trample upon us...

but I will do this

*Marshmallow attack bombs*

[Nakajo]

SC:You know! I Should report you! It's Illegal not to have a bathroom in your place of business!
Me(oh noos!!! he Knows the LAW!)) Yes, It is illegal not to have a bathroom in your place of business for your employees to use. However, Not having a bathroom for your customers is an inconvenience... but not illegal.

To my knowledge, you only need to have a public bathroom if you provide a dining-in food related service, like a restaurant.

[Supermarket Slave Girl]

hehe...^_^ It's okay! I'll not harm one of my fellow work slaves. ... only those who attempt to trample upon us...

but I will do this

*Marshmallow attack bombs*

Yummm marshmallows, more please

[Ghengis51]

The Finale

The icing on my cake tonight though.... was as I was getting ready to leave after the store had closed.... there were these guys... lingering out side... drunk as fuck.... and when we walked towards the door... they started shaking and banging on it "Let us in bitches!" "We got good money!" "Open the FUCK up"
Now I parked all the way out in the BFE... ((thats Bum fuck Egypt for all confused)) and I was NOT walking out there with them.... so... I ended up staying late... an extra half hour before they left..... ... I dont like staying late....I cant drive well in the dark...

Honestly, next time that happens, call the cops. That's what they're there for, you obviously didn't feel safe going to your car with them there, so let the nice police officers do their job. you might even get some free entertainment if one of the guys mouths off.

[dalesys]

*Marshmallow attack bombs*

Try running the colored miniature marshmallows through a food drier (mesh shelves + blower circulating slightly heated air)
Spread them out so they're in a single layer& mostly not touching.

The little marshies puff up 2x into kinda divinity/coton candy poofs.

When grandma'a around we called them "Angel Burps" elsewhen just reversed the angels.

[PepperElf]

I can honestly say I've done... almost worse.

In my defense though... the "out of order" sign was... a helmet on the door knob.

No one's going to assume a simple helmet hanging off a door know means that! They're going to think that some idiot just stuck it there cos they were too lazy to put it away properly. Normally they put up an actual sign - or a giant sheet-metal lock.

So naturally... yeah someone (... um me...) used it.

Then when I flushed I realized the hose wasn't connected to the bowl. I tried to aim it at the bowl as much as possible but it made a mess.

The only bright side was that the person who had been working on it turned out to be someone I couldn't stand.

After that she made the effort to actually put up a lock.
Not just a helmet on the door knob.

I should feel guilty...

[Tuxian]

I get that too, Pepper. And since I work as a casino dealer, it's even worse.

I'll be dealing a hand of blackjack, and I'll beat the table with a 20 or 21, and as I'm picking up their losses, they'll look at me and go "Seriously? Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME? How the fuck did you do that? Seriously?!"

And not once. No no... they'll do it EVERY HAND. And considering I deal as fast as I can, and a hand lasts maybe 20 seconds, I'm hearing that 2-3 times a MINUTE.

Yeah, I get REALLY tired of that word. I just look at 'em and go "Yep. Left my clown nose at home tonight."

[sirwired]

I don't understand the whole Paper-Towels-In-The-Toilet thing either. That seems to happen once or twice a week in my building.

The folks here can't even use the lack of toilet paper as an excuse. In the five years I've been in this building, I have seen an empty toilet paper dispenser ONCE. (We have those nifty dispensers that hold two gigantic rolls, and won't let you use the second until the first one is empty.)

I understand that some guys have bad aim, but dammit, I'm having a hard time figuring out how you are going to get sick by sitting on some invisible film of crud. It's not as if germs magically migrate from the toilet seat into your bloodstream.

SirWired

[Melicious Motormouth]

And of course there is always the bathing suite issue.....
Me: Sorry but the two piece bottoms cannot go back to the fitting room
SC: Seriously?
Me:...... Yeah..... It's company policy.
SC: Seriously?!

><CHANGING HOW YOU SAY IT IS NOT GOING TO MAKE ME CHANGE MY MIND DAMNIT!!!! JUST STOP ASKING ME IF I"M SERIOUS! I'M PRETTY FUCKING SERIOUS!

Sucky Customer in Training
Me: Sorry ma'am, but I cant allow the two piece bottoms back to the fitting room.
SC: Are you Kidding me?!
Me(YES! Gotcha! ARG!)) No Ma'am, it's company policy, the two piece bottoms have to remain out here.
SC: Then how do I know if they fit?!
Me: No Idea. It's strange, I understand, but that's the policy and I have to keep to it.
SC: So...what about the regular bathing suits... can I try those on.
ME: Yes.
SC:.....But not the two piece.....
Me(Wow! You're brilliant! Just catching on are we?)) Yes. Thats right.
SC: Why Cant I try the bottoms! ITS NOT DIFFERENT!
Me: <blah blah blah about health codes and "underwear" etc>
SC: So what! You want me to stand out here in my UNDERWEAR AND TRY THEM ON IN FRONT OF YOU?!
ME:.............. uh....... I... don't think that would be very appropriate.... ((Where did you get that from!! help!))
SC: This is ridiculous! ((she is turning a lovely color of red at this point)) I Want to speak to your manager young lady!
Me: Okay. ^_^

I pawn her off on Ca____ and get to stand and listen to her become more and more irate. "THIS young lady" she pointed her finger at me... you know the one... not looking at me just accusing me. "Told me that I can try on the one piece bathing suits but I have to leave the BOTTOMS of the two piece out here!"

Seriously?! These people thought it would be okay for them to try on a piece of clothing which is in direct contact with their genitals that they may or may not buy? Seriously?!

And you KNOW they would be the first ones complaining if they found they were trying on used underpants.

That is so effing gross.

[cawaker]

I gotta admit i've pulled the Seriously line a few times, but its usually at Hooters when i'm half drunk already and I order a pitcher of beer and they ask who else is sharing it with me, cause apparently 5 pitchers between 3 guys is okay but 1 pitcher for one guy isnt.

i hate hooters, its so over rated and the food sucks.

[slavetotheman]

I'm having a hard time figuring out how you are going to get sick by sitting on some invisible film of crud. It's not as if germs magically migrate from the toilet seat into your bloodstream.

It's not getting sick per se, it's just the ick factor. I agree, though, that it's no excuse to flush paper towels. Wet a wad of TP, wipe the seat down, then dry with another bit of paper, flush those 2 pieces, then line the toilet seat with strips of TP and sit your ass down.

Or, you know, use a liner.

Or hold it til you get home.

Or... okay, I'm out of ideas.

[Red_Dazes]

Try running the colored miniature marshmallows through a food drier (mesh shelves + blower circulating slightly heated air)
Spread them out so they're in a single layer& mostly not touching.

The little marshies puff up 2x into kinda divinity/coton candy poofs.

When grandma'a around we called them "Angel Burps" elsewhen just reversed the angels.

Holy crap that sounds delicious....... Must try this next time I visit my mother.....*Plot plot plot*

[Megg]

My coworkers used to ask me this stupid ass question all the time. "Are you serious?" I took to answering, "Nah just making it up to mess with you!" Gotta add the sarcastic eyeroll, as well.