"I have to PAY?!" and "It worked at home!!!"

[Dave1982]

I am SO thankful that I did not have to deal with this guy directly.

Towards the end of my shift a co-worker walked past mumbling to himself.

Me: What's that?

CW: Oh, I just got of the phone with a fucking grouch.

So this guy had called and immediately started screaming about how his printer wasn't working. It was a Samsung b/w laser. He paid TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS for it () and it's NOT WORKING! The WORLD IS ENDING!

First of all, he bought it three months ago. In that three months, did he call Samsung tech support to see if they could help him? Did he have a tech-savvy friend or family member stop by the house? Did he go online to Samsung's website to find additional information? Or did he simply return the printer?

No, none of the above. Instead, he wrestled with it on his own for three months until he finally lost his patience and called us, screaming.

At first my co-worker tried to get him the toll-free number for Samsung, but no, that wasn't good enough. He wanted us to get his printer working, because BY GOLLY we sold it, therefore WE ARE FOREVER RESPONSIBLE FOR IT!!

Oh, and should go without saying that he didn't buy our service plan. Even if he had, I doubt he'd have called the tech support number for it.

Co-worker tells the guy that yes, we can set up the printer for him. However, he will need top bring his computer and printer into the store, and he will be charged $39.99 for the service.

SC: $40?!?!? Why the hell shoudl I pay $40 to set it up?!? I already paid TWO HUNDRED DOLLARS for it, and I've been out of work a long time now!!

CW: Well I'm sorry to hear that, but regardless, we HAVE to charge for the service. There's no way around that.

SC: But why should I have to PAY $40 when I ALREADY PAID TWO HUNDRED?! I've been out of work!

Yeah, you and MILLIONS of other people in this country alone, fuckstick. You know what? I don't like this job that much. If better work was available for me, I'd take it in a heartbeat! But there isn't, so I thank my lucky stars that I have A job, that pays me enough that I can afford to blow some money now and again on useless stuff like classic video games and a B-17 model kit (). It's unfortunate that you are out of work, but that doesn't entitle you to JACK SHIT from a company such as Staples. You know why? Because we are a FOR PROFIT COMPANY!!! We offer products and SERVICES for a FEE. If we gave away services like this for free, we wouldn't make money, and our bosses would FIRE US. Then, we'd be in the same boat as you. We do not want to join you in that boat because the boat sucks hard enough in and of itself without entitlement-minded DOUCHEBAGS like yourself as fellow passengers.

Besides, since you've already ruled out calling Samsung tech support, and apparently have no friends or family willing to help (big surprise there given the attitude), what other option do you have? If you don't have the wherewithal for such a prosaic task as getting a printer set up and working, then you really don't have the right to complain that a FOR PROFIT COMPANY has the gumption to CHARGE YOU to do it for you.

Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with not having basic computer skills, but that's not MY problem. My grandmother can't drive, but that doesn't mean she expects Yellow Taxi to chauffeur her around for free BECAUSE she can't drive. On those occasions where she needs a cab or the bus, she pays, because they exist for just that reason. Similarly, our tech services exist for those who are unable to do these things for themselves, either because it's beyond their capability or because they don't have the time to do it themselves.

So yes, YOU HAVE TO PAY!!!!

Yes, I'm getting overly worked up about this, but you should have seen my co-worker. He was so spun up he was talking to himself.

A short time later, the guy actually came in. He brought his computer and printer in, but he left the damn driver CD at home.

SC: It's in the drive.

I open the drive and remove the TurboTax Home & Business disc inside and show it to him.

Me: This is TurboTax.

He doens't even LOOK at it.

SC: No, that's the printer disc!

Me: Sir, this is TURBOTAX *all but thrusts the disc into his face*

SC finally looks.

SC: Oh, shit.....does that mean I have to go back home for the disc?

CW: Yes.

SC: Do you REALLY need it?

I let my co-worker handle it while I went back to hooking his computer up to the bench for a boot check. And I can't get video output. Terrific. He actually had two VGA ports - the factory port, and an aftermarket video card - and neither of them worked, at all. I tried calling the guy back over but he was already out the door.

I pretty much gave up at that point, as I am not a technician, nor was I the one dealing with this customer. My unfortunate co-worker was the one who was going to do the setup, and I had other customers to help and other tasks to accomplish. However, I did learn later that the second VGA port (on the card) was broken because the customer had overtorqued the connector. He'd literally tightened the retaining screws so much he snapped off one of the nuts. And in doing so he damaged the port.

When he came back in, he of course played the "it works fine with MY monitor!" card. Apparently if you insert the cable just so, it works, but after diddling with it for several minutes, even the customer couldn't make it work.

CW: Sir, it's broken. It's not going to work.

SC: But it works at home!

CW: Sir, you need a new video card.

SC: But it works!

No, no it doesn't. And how much are you willing to bet that the reason he has that other video card is because he did the same damn thing to the factory VGA port and broke it?

By the way, this computer was ANCIENT. So old that he was using a PARALLEL PORT to connect to the printer. He'd purchased one of the very few printers we sell that still has a parallel port on it.

He wound up leaving without a printer setup. Though he undoubtedly did so after declaring it all OUR fault.

Yet another person who should not own a computer.

[Melicious Motormouth]

So yes, YOU HAVE TO PAY!!!!

Beautiful.

[Nyoibo]

By the way, this computer was ANCIENT. So old that he was using a PARALLEL PORT to connect to the printer. He'd purchased one of the very few printers we sell that still has a parallel port on it.

They still have them?

[AdamAnt316]

They still have them?

Last I checked, Brother still sold a few (mostly the older models, of course; at the time, they still sold printers whose included drivers supported Windows 98 and Me, and they still might), and there are probably a couple of others. Most of the printers you're likely to see them on these days are laser printers, since that's what businesses tend to use, and businesses tend to be a few steps behind technology-wise. Heck, Staples still sells both dot-matrix printers and fanfold perforated-edge greenbar paper, likely for similar reasons.
-Adam

[HawaiianShirts]

Why is it so easy for me to imagine this guy going into the Staples in the next town over and making a complaint like this:

"You idiots owe me a whole new computer and printer set for free! One of your incompetent monkeys in the other store sold me a defective printer that damaged my computer when I tried to use it. Now my video card is broken, my monitor is broken, and I still can't print. And when I asked about it, they refused to fix it, even after I went to all the trouble to bring the computer in. Not only did they refuse to fix it, they caused even more damage because they're just lazy and stupid. And because of all that I have been out of work for the past three months! Therefore, you owe me a new computer system, a new printer, and three months of lost wages. I'm the customer, and I'm always right, and if you don't get me what I want, I'll make sure you get fired! And then I'll sue you!

Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with not having basic computer skills, but that's not MY problem. My grandmother can't drive, but that doesn't mean she expects Yellow Taxi to chauffeur her around for free BECAUSE she can't drive. On those occasions where she needs a cab or the bus, she pays, because they exist for just that reason. Similarly, our tech services exist for those who are unable to do these things for themselves, either because it's beyond their capability or because they don't have the time to do it themselves.

So yes, YOU HAVE TO PAY!!!!

Yes, I'm getting overly worked up about this, but you should have seen my co-worker. He was so spun up he was talking to himself.

No, I don't think you're getting overly worked up about this. I've been there many times as well. It's infuriating!

I really like the taxi analogy. I just might start using that to explain to customers why we charge for products and services. Of course, then I'll get the one who does expect Yellow Taxi to give them free rides. Probably the same kind of person who expects used car dealers to service the car for free (even when they get drunk and back it into a fire hydrant or something) or who expect free refills for life for buying one small coffee.

People say that capitalism is dying. I disagree, but if it is true, it seems to me its people like this who are trying to kill it.

[ditchdj]

Yeah but he's got a point about EVERYTHING store-related being charged with fees. Hell it used to be where if someone wrote you a check you could go to the bank the check orginated from and they'd cash it for free, even if you didn't have an account there. Nope, not anymore. Now they even charge for that. It's like every single random act of kindness that's business-related costs money.

[tropicsgoddess]

Your co-worker should have one of these on me for dealing with that asshat. I don't understand how people like that idiot can own a computer and think that once you buy it it has to last forever. I am shocked that SC still owned something so freaking ancient and expected his printer to work on his ancient ass computer. Seriously. I had one lady give me shit once because she had to pay again to have another issue fixed with her computer. It really grinds my gears when people expect to have free technical support. Hey we gotta make money, ya know!!

[Apathy]

You have to pay each time your car or dishwasher breaks, why would your computer be any different?

[Chanlin]

I still use an HP printer with a parallel port hook up. I've had it for about 9 years and it still works just fine so i see no need to replace it

[Skeksin]

I just have to laugh at the idiots who threaten to sue me individually. If I recall correctly the law is, in the states anyway, that an employee cannot be sued directly for doing their job. They can sue the company for whatever happened but the courts will laugh it out of existence if the EW tries to sue an individual employee. As long as that employee was doing what they are supposed to do.

Oh and I own a computer with a Parallel port. It's not on the new one but the old one has it..... (yay for finally having parts to have 2 machines)

[Dave1982]

This tale gets even better!

Our initial assessment was that this idiot had managed to break both of his VGA ports. While he did damage them, the truth is even worse than that.

We had a new technician in the store, and after I left for the night, he decided to take a look at it. On a whim, he popped out the secondary video card and reinserted it. THis caused that port to work when he next started the machine.

Upon further investigation (and an admission by the SC), it was determined that this moron had decided to delete a whole ton of files he thought he didn't need, and one of those was the driver for that card. Somehow, in removing and reinstalling the card, it caused the default driver to kick in (there was likely more to it than that, but this is what I was told). He was then able to find and install the right driver for his video card, restoring it to full functionality (aside from the physical damage).

Now, somewhere along the line, the customer was contacted and told that if he still wanted us to do the printer set up, then we would need to add an additional charge for diagnosing and repairing his video problem. Honestly, I don't know if this was before or after the work was actually done. He agreed, amazingly enough.


Then this morning, he called the store TWICE before the store had opened because apparently overnight he forgot why he needed to pay more money. Our sales manger explained everything to him in detail - TWICE - and he seemed to be satisfied with the explanation.


Well, he wasn't.

After the store opened, he called in at least three times to argue with our Customer Service Lead about 1) having to pay MORE money when he'd already paid us $40 (once again playing that "pay once; receive forever" card) and 2) why he had to pay that $40 in the first place.

By the time I came in, he'd called or come into the store a total of NINE TIMES in less than 24 hours.

And he kept calling! A few hours after I got in, my CW (the same who dealt with this douchebag yesterday) said "he's now called NINE TIMES TODAY!"

And when he finally came in to pick up his computer and pay for the additional services, he had to argue some MORE!

Then, when checking out, he said to the CSL "Can you subtract out the $50?"

CSL: What $50?

SC: Well, since I'd already paid for the printer setup, can that be applied towards what I owe now?


It was all I could do to not strangle the guy for that.

It had to be explained for the UMPTEENTH TIME exactly what services he'd received and what he owed for them, AND the fact that he was in fact getting a break from us, because strictly speaking, reinstalling the video driver is NOT part of a diagnostic, and technically he should have paid an installation charge for that, but we weren't charging it. This had alreayd been explained several times and yet he STILL felt he shouldn't have to pay as much.

Fucking freeloader. I'd hope for his computer to burst into flames, but then he'd be back in here expecting us to fix it for him for free, and I just don't want to see him or his machine ever again.

[MadMike]

They still have them?

I was wondering the same thing. Every printer I've bought since 2000 has been USB.

Heck, Staples still sells both dot-matrix printers and fanfold perforated-edge greenbar paper, likely for similar reasons.
-Adam

Wow, I thought those went out in the early 90s.

[protege]

Wow, I thought those went out in the early 90s.

Some companies still use dot-matrix and that "wonderful' greenbar crap simply because it's cheap...and usually just for internal reports only.

As for non-USB printers, our newer Samsung (oddly enough!) laser printers still have them for some reason. Even though the printer has a network port, if something happens to our server, I can use the parallel port as a backup. Set the thing up on one of the terminals, share it, and it works

[Dave1982]

Heck, Staples still sells both dot-matrix printers and fanfold perforated-edge greenbar paper, likely for similar reasons.
-Adam

The dot-matrix printers are only available by special order. However, my store has 8 feet of shelf space devoted to fanfold paper, and 16 feet devoted to thermal fax paper, neither of which sells.

[Bandit]

Some companies still use dot-matrix and that "wonderful' greenbar crap simply because it's cheap...and usually just for internal reports only.

There are also requirements for NCR forms and various other government things that still need the old dot-matrix tanks.

B