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My very first call of the day was a doozy and a half.
Guy calls up and complains that I'm working with the stupidest brain dead insulting assclowns on the planet. Says he had just spoken to a coworker and that she just didn't know a damn thing about any of our flowers, couldn't suggest a thing and insulted him before hanging up on him and HE'S A GOODDDDD CUSTOMER!! Eleventyyy1111!!!
Usually this means customer has dropped f-bomb or insulted brain cell levels or racial heritage of agent.
So I start talking to this twatwaffle, apologizing for any problems he encountered and offering to help his ass. He's swearing that he's trying to order flowers for a former girlfriend to tell her how much her lurves, lurves, lurves her, but only to her office, not home because her current boyfriend might see this.
He picks only the most expensive crap we sell with oodles of balloons, candies and romantic geegaws. We get to the payment screen and he's demanding half off because he was so so so insulted earlier. I sigh, put his ass on hold to talk to the supervisor, knowing I'll be able to counter with a 25% off.
Supervisor says oh hell no, you cannot give the assclown any discount because my coworker was crying. She had pulled and listened to the call and the assclown was rude, obnoxious, cursing and stupid. No discounts at all....
I know this is going to be a ratfuck so I take my time getting back on the phone, visit the potty, make another pot of coffee before getting back on the phone and telling Mr Insult that I cannot offer him anything beyond our savings club program. He takes the news meekly, no cursing or bargaining after I tell him that the supervisor has already listened to the phone call and my coworker is crying. I tell him this only after he insists that the coworker be fired.
And the rest goes smoothly, no cursing, no attitude. Meek, mild and he buys all the expensive crap I get additional monies for, quick delivery, extra crap and the savers club.
I love it when you can prove to them that they were out of the box and it shuts their asses up. Not so big and bad then.
Guy calls up and complains that I'm working with the stupidest brain dead insulting assclowns on the planet. Says he had just spoken to a coworker and that she just didn't know a damn thing about any of our flowers, couldn't suggest a thing and insulted him before hanging up on him and HE'S A GOODDDDD CUSTOMER!! Eleventyyy1111!!!
Usually this means customer has dropped f-bomb or insulted brain cell levels or racial heritage of agent.
So I start talking to this twatwaffle, apologizing for any problems he encountered and offering to help his ass. He's swearing that he's trying to order flowers for a former girlfriend to tell her how much her lurves, lurves, lurves her, but only to her office, not home because her current boyfriend might see this.
He picks only the most expensive crap we sell with oodles of balloons, candies and romantic geegaws. We get to the payment screen and he's demanding half off because he was so so so insulted earlier. I sigh, put his ass on hold to talk to the supervisor, knowing I'll be able to counter with a 25% off.
Supervisor says oh hell no, you cannot give the assclown any discount because my coworker was crying. She had pulled and listened to the call and the assclown was rude, obnoxious, cursing and stupid. No discounts at all....
I know this is going to be a ratfuck so I take my time getting back on the phone, visit the potty, make another pot of coffee before getting back on the phone and telling Mr Insult that I cannot offer him anything beyond our savings club program. He takes the news meekly, no cursing or bargaining after I tell him that the supervisor has already listened to the phone call and my coworker is crying. I tell him this only after he insists that the coworker be fired.
And the rest goes smoothly, no cursing, no attitude. Meek, mild and he buys all the expensive crap I get additional monies for, quick delivery, extra crap and the savers club.
I love it when you can prove to them that they were out of the box and it shuts their asses up. Not so big and bad then.
I love it.
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