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So I work tech support. I spend about half my time just typing replies, which go far, far faster than trying to help the poor SOB's who call the phone.
Seriously, just make a damn tech support ticket. It saves both of us tons of time, and the 40 minutes I'm on the phone with you trying to explain the arcane mysteries of how to get into the BIOS means that I'm not helping anyone else for those 40 minutes.
Well, I got a call from someone who had sent in a faulty product. See, it turns out that as soon as he got the component, he instantly destroyed and shredded all packaging and receipts, so he couldn't return it to the store he bought it from. They do things a helluva lot faster than we do because we are perpetually out of inventory because we *gasp* sell it all to those stores!
But not to be deterred, he sent in the faulty product! A week ago.
He was absolutely furious we hadn't yet shipped out the replacement. See, we were out of stock because we had just shipped a whole bunch of it to the exact same reseller he had bought the thing and destroyed all of the packaging so they wouldn't take it back.
A brilliant plan!
"Yes I want to know why I haven't received the memory yet."
"Hmm, lemme check......yup, we're out of stock. We'll ship it out as soon as we get more inventory in.
"WHAT!? So you say I send it in, and I have to wait!? Unacceptable!"
"Sir, we're out of stock. This is why we always recommend doing the RMA with the reseller first, as they are faster about it."
"I threw away the package and receipt. They wouldn't take it back so they tell me to send it to you. Now when are you going to ship out the memory?"
"We don't have any to ship out. As soon as we get more in stock it will be sent to you."
"I can't wait that long! How long do you want me to wait? Why is this taking so long!"
"Sir, thats because we are out of stock. I have none in inventory--"
"NO! I only have it for a few hours. I sent it in right after I got it. Now what are you going to do about it?"
"I'd like to send you a replacement, but we just don't have any in stock."
"Why not!? I buy this a week ago, I not use it yet, and now you take the memory and my money!"
"It has a lifetime warranty on tech support and replacements, we are just temporarily out of stock--"
"No! Send me the replacement now!"
"I don't have any to give you. Sir! We are out of stock. We have zero of them!"
"So how long I gotta wait, huh?"
"I don't know when we will be getting more in, but it should be soon."
"Soon? No! Tell me when."
"I do not have this information."
After much flailing about like this, nearly 15 minutes of saying pretty much the same thing, eventually one of the guys in the neighboring cube was able to scrounge up some refurbished ones.
"HOW LONG I GOTTA WAIT!?"
"Sir, if you want one now, I can give you a refurbished one."
"I DON'T WANT A REFURBISHED ONE, I BOUGHT A NEW ONE SO GIVE ME A NEW ONE!"
"If you want one now, all I can offer is a refurbished one. If you want a new one, then you have to wait."
"NO, I NOT WAITING MORE, I SEND IT IN A WEEK AGO, SEND IT OUT NOW!!"
After some more flailing about like this, eventually we decided to just send him a refurbished memory kit packaged as if it was new.
As soon as I magically "found" our last kit left in inventory and offered it to him, he instantly calmed down. He was demanding the exact same thing from me for some 30 minutes. I don't know how many times I repeated the same statement pointing out that we were out of stock. I even asked him how I could go about replacing it for him if we don't have any! He apparently just wanted me to pull one out of the magical backroom. Or my ass.
So he should be getting the "new" kit soonish.
Hopefully this will get him to go away for good.
Seriously, just make a damn tech support ticket. It saves both of us tons of time, and the 40 minutes I'm on the phone with you trying to explain the arcane mysteries of how to get into the BIOS means that I'm not helping anyone else for those 40 minutes.
Well, I got a call from someone who had sent in a faulty product. See, it turns out that as soon as he got the component, he instantly destroyed and shredded all packaging and receipts, so he couldn't return it to the store he bought it from. They do things a helluva lot faster than we do because we are perpetually out of inventory because we *gasp* sell it all to those stores!
But not to be deterred, he sent in the faulty product! A week ago.
He was absolutely furious we hadn't yet shipped out the replacement. See, we were out of stock because we had just shipped a whole bunch of it to the exact same reseller he had bought the thing and destroyed all of the packaging so they wouldn't take it back.
A brilliant plan!
"Yes I want to know why I haven't received the memory yet."
"Hmm, lemme check......yup, we're out of stock. We'll ship it out as soon as we get more inventory in.
"WHAT!? So you say I send it in, and I have to wait!? Unacceptable!"
"Sir, we're out of stock. This is why we always recommend doing the RMA with the reseller first, as they are faster about it."
"I threw away the package and receipt. They wouldn't take it back so they tell me to send it to you. Now when are you going to ship out the memory?"
"We don't have any to ship out. As soon as we get more in stock it will be sent to you."
"I can't wait that long! How long do you want me to wait? Why is this taking so long!"
"Sir, thats because we are out of stock. I have none in inventory--"
"NO! I only have it for a few hours. I sent it in right after I got it. Now what are you going to do about it?"
"I'd like to send you a replacement, but we just don't have any in stock."
"Why not!? I buy this a week ago, I not use it yet, and now you take the memory and my money!"
"It has a lifetime warranty on tech support and replacements, we are just temporarily out of stock--"
"No! Send me the replacement now!"
"I don't have any to give you. Sir! We are out of stock. We have zero of them!"
"So how long I gotta wait, huh?"
"I don't know when we will be getting more in, but it should be soon."
"Soon? No! Tell me when."
"I do not have this information."
After much flailing about like this, nearly 15 minutes of saying pretty much the same thing, eventually one of the guys in the neighboring cube was able to scrounge up some refurbished ones.
"HOW LONG I GOTTA WAIT!?"
"Sir, if you want one now, I can give you a refurbished one."
"I DON'T WANT A REFURBISHED ONE, I BOUGHT A NEW ONE SO GIVE ME A NEW ONE!"
"If you want one now, all I can offer is a refurbished one. If you want a new one, then you have to wait."
"NO, I NOT WAITING MORE, I SEND IT IN A WEEK AGO, SEND IT OUT NOW!!"
After some more flailing about like this, eventually we decided to just send him a refurbished memory kit packaged as if it was new.
As soon as I magically "found" our last kit left in inventory and offered it to him, he instantly calmed down. He was demanding the exact same thing from me for some 30 minutes. I don't know how many times I repeated the same statement pointing out that we were out of stock. I even asked him how I could go about replacing it for him if we don't have any! He apparently just wanted me to pull one out of the magical backroom. Or my ass.
So he should be getting the "new" kit soonish.
Hopefully this will get him to go away for good.
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