"The store, the store, the store is on fire..."

[Imprl59]

"The store, the store, the store is on fire!
We don't need no water let the mother f_cker burn,
Burn mother f_cker burn.."

Perhaps I'm just so tired that I'm a little loopy but I laughed so hard at this I had tears in my eyes.

We have a sub place here called FireHouse subs. They give away these nifty fabulous plastic fire hats (supposedly just to the kids) and I had to have one. I took it back in to work with me.

Several days later someone threw a lit cigarette in the bus stop garbage can outside our store causing a small fire. The owner of the store was trying to put the fire out so, in my very best effort to be of assitance, I grabbed my fire hat, put it on and ran around the parking lot waving my arms and making fire truck noises... Our UPS guy happened to drive by about that time and almost fell out of the truck looking to see what the heck I was up to. I guess it isnt every day you see a fat old guy who thinks he's a fire truck.

[Mr Hero]

If the idiots wanted to get into the store so badly, you should have let them. Who are you to argue with natural selection?

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

One person walked right past the fire truck parked infront of one of the doors, over the fire hoses and tried to get inside only to be stopped, much to her displeasure, by a fireman.

<blink><blink> Huh?

People were actually ARGUING with the cops and firemen at the doors. And others were lining up at the side doors on the entrance ways to get it. One after another trying to get into a door that was LOCKED!!

<twitch>

There was this one lady who stood at the cross walk to one of the entrances and stared at the cop car and police tape for about five minutes before walking across and trying to go inside.

Dude! Wait, what?

CS: If the store had a fire, why did you close the pharmacy??

Would someone do me a favor? If you see a brain running around and yelping like a puppy that had its tail under Granny's rocking chair, please give it a bag of ice and send it back to my head.

[Midnight_Angel]

"B... but they are having such a HOT sale, right now!"

*runs for cover*

[dalesys]

I could be wrong, but I think that time delay on the emergency exit could be a fire code violation. If there were a fast moving fire in the building, those extra seconds could be CRITICAL.

I install card access systems, and by the codes we use, delayed exits are to be released / delay disabled when fire alarm is active.

However, some inspectors never get a round-tuit, don't care, are paid off...; some managers refuse to pay for the interconnection, many delayed exits are stand alone (without any external connection at all).

Also, the codes specify a unchangeable delay of 15 seconds (30 with approval of the (Fire) Authority Having Jurisdiction), so I suspect the mangle muncher saying "5 seconds" was running their mouth off/ too lazy to know how stuff really works.

[Sheldonrs]

You yell "FIRE" and SCs tack on the word "SALE" and keep shopping.

"Escuse me! This shirt is burning. I WANT A DISCOUNT!!!!!"

[AirHostess]

People who are stupid enough to want to carry on shopping during a fire deserve what they get. Natural selection for you!

Personally, if I was on a burning plane and people were fussing about with their bags rather than evacuating...I would just get myself out of there!

[ralerin]

There was smoke and filling the place and people would NOT LEAVE!!! There were actually people who refused to leave until they were checked out.

Holy cow.

Tsk...I wish you could've left them in there. who are you to argue with natural selection, as others have said.

My friends and I begin to sing as we go to the car:

"The store, the store, the store is on fire!
We don't need no water let the mother f_cker burn,
Burn mother f_cker burn.."

Bloodhound Gang ftw! Do I get a cookie?

[bainsidhe]

Our store's alarm has a tendencey to go off every other month or so. Only once in the last three years has there been a fire (one of the vents over an exit, of all things), but every time it's a hassle trying to get customers to exit. Every. Single. Time. Nowadays I leave it for managers to bother with. I got tired of getting sniped at "I've already been told!" when I tell a customer they need to evacuate. "But it's myyyyy cart of groceries, I'm not going to steeeaaaallll it!" a customer would declare while trying to wheel their full cart outside. And customers would still check out. And cashiers would still check them out. Yeah, I know. Chances are pretty unlikely that the loud sirens and flashing lights mean a real, honest to goodness fire. But c'mon already.

And the stepping past fire trucks and hoses? Well, that's pretty priceless.

[Imprl59]

Bloodhound Gang ftw! Do I get a cookie?

Hmmm.. maybe half a cookie. Bloodhound Gang just used it (along with about 20 others). The original was Rock Master Scott & the Dynamic Three in 1984.

[morgana]

Some people are just the wrong kind of amazing, aren't they? I've said it before and I'll say it again, if I hear a fire alarm get out of my way. Or you'll have footprints on your back. I've been in a building fire.

If the SC's want to stay in a burning building, or go in past the police and firemen, I say let 'em. As someone on here says in their sig, "Stupid should hurt!"

[KiaKat]

Several days later someone threw a lit cigarette in the bus stop garbage can outside our store causing a small fire. The owner of the store was trying to put the fire out so, in my very best effort to be of assitance, I grabbed my fire hat, put it on and ran around the parking lot waving my arms and making fire truck noises...

*snerk*

*giggles madly*

*falls off chair*

*rolls around laughing*

That's BRILLIANT. I love it.

Also reminds me of a few weeks ago. We were sitting in the store, as always, and noticed that there was a bit of an orange-reddish glow coming through the frosted windows...and then that there were lots of sirens...

And...they were all stopping at our corner...

My coworker went outside, looked around, came in, and said... "someone set the trash can across the street on fire."

Perfectly matter-of-fact, no confusion in her voice, no "WTF face," nothing.

I, of course, was utterly confused, and wondering who the *hell* would do something like that.

And, wouldn't you expect city sanitation to take care of it? Nope. It sat there for three days till someone called the city services line.

[PepperElf]

People were actually ARGUING with the cops and firemen at the doors

This of course is secret code for "please arrest me"
or "please blow me back with a firehose"

either one will work

[Despina83]

Hmmm, at Meijer the fire doors have signs that say they have to be pushed for fifteen seconds before they will open.

[Gibbo]

What the hell were people saying to the cops and firemen when they were told the building was on fire.