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I have returned from the depths of tech support with yet again another sad tale. I bring you one more of my customers, with behaviour so unique and yet so common that I have given them their own customer subtype.
I present, Mr. Nitpicker.
Dingwell: Me.
Nitpicker: The customer in question.
Dingwell: Thank you for contacting Kersnizon. How can I assist you today?
Nitpicker: I'm not going into this again! You should know what the problem is!
(Well, I'm not psychic, and I do usually work with multiple customers at any given time as I work in chat support, but I humor him as he may actually have a recurring problem. When I check the notes he has called in about 11 times in the last week, but I can't make heads or tails of the notes.)
Nitpicker: Did you go to sleep on me?
Dingwell: (Checks time, exactly two minutes have passed.) No sir, I have not gone to sleep, you asked me to read the notes on your account and there are quite a few of them. I'm not really seeing exactly what the problem is however.
Nitpcker: My email page shows a bunch of wierd symbols when I log into it from Kersnizon Mainpage!
Dingwell: (Logs directly into Kersnizon email page. The emails in question load perfectly.) I've just logged into the email sir, it loaded just fine for me.
Kersnizon: Well I have all these weird symbols! There's a problem on the website and I want it fixed! I tried calling the number and it's disconnected.
Dingwell: I apologize for that sir, I assure you our tech support lines are still connected. What number did you call? (As I look around the 60,000 square feet of call center space filled with about 200 odd agents... all on the phones.)
Nitpicker: 1-800-XXX-XXXX. (Number I've never heard of.)
Dingwell: That's not our tech support number sir.
Nitpicker: I know it's not your tech support number! I was trying to call the company that designed the website so they could get the email page fixed!
Dingwell: (He tried calling the people that make the website directly?
) Ok, well, I do apologize for that. Why don't we see if we can get this to work properly. This might be a problem with your browser.
Nitpicker: I tried six different browsers. Internet Explorer, Netscape, Mozilla, Firefox, MSN....every one I could think of. The problem still happens. It's bad code on the page.
Dingwell: Ok, well, if you set up a email program like Outlook Express you may have a better result with that email.
Nitpicker: I already have it set up. It works fine in that program. I want the WEBPAGE fixed.
Dingwell: Sir, I logged directly into the Kersnizon email and I don't see any of the issues you're describing. the email loaded perfectly for me.
Nitpicker: I've tried this on 15 different computers and it loads wrong no matter what browser I try. This needs to be fixed!
Dingwell: Ok, well, if we go to http://email.kersnizon.com do you have the same problem on that page?
Nitpicker: No! That page works fine! I already told you this only happens if you try and go to the email from The Kersnizon homepage!
(And right there, his true nature is revealed. He's a nitpicker. He already has two seperate solutions to the problem, Email programs like Outlook Express or he can use the direct access to email website. But no, he's upset because a link on the homepage is loading a malfuctioning page. For this, he tried the page on 15 different computers, loaded and tried six different browsers and contacted us 11 times in 3 days.
)
Dingwell: Ok, sir, really, there isn't anything that I can do about this. I have no access to the code on the website, the page is actually consistently under construction and there will be issues like this from time to time. It's not something that I can fix for you and I do apologize for that.
Nitpicker: Fine! Thanks for wasting my time! (Ends Session.)
I'd like to point out that if you tried fifteen different computers, six different browsers and called or contacted us 11 times in three days for an issue that you already knew how to work around that perhaps it wasn't me that was wasting your valuable time.
And can you imagine if a Ms. Nitpicker had babies with a Mr. Volcanic? Good lord, the apocolypse would be nigh I tell you...
Dingwell
I present, Mr. Nitpicker.
Dingwell: Me.
Nitpicker: The customer in question.
Dingwell: Thank you for contacting Kersnizon. How can I assist you today?
Nitpicker: I'm not going into this again! You should know what the problem is!
(Well, I'm not psychic, and I do usually work with multiple customers at any given time as I work in chat support, but I humor him as he may actually have a recurring problem. When I check the notes he has called in about 11 times in the last week, but I can't make heads or tails of the notes.)
Nitpicker: Did you go to sleep on me?
Dingwell: (Checks time, exactly two minutes have passed.) No sir, I have not gone to sleep, you asked me to read the notes on your account and there are quite a few of them. I'm not really seeing exactly what the problem is however.
Nitpcker: My email page shows a bunch of wierd symbols when I log into it from Kersnizon Mainpage!
Dingwell: (Logs directly into Kersnizon email page. The emails in question load perfectly.) I've just logged into the email sir, it loaded just fine for me.
Kersnizon: Well I have all these weird symbols! There's a problem on the website and I want it fixed! I tried calling the number and it's disconnected.
Dingwell: I apologize for that sir, I assure you our tech support lines are still connected. What number did you call? (As I look around the 60,000 square feet of call center space filled with about 200 odd agents... all on the phones.)
Nitpicker: 1-800-XXX-XXXX. (Number I've never heard of.)
Dingwell: That's not our tech support number sir.
Nitpicker: I know it's not your tech support number! I was trying to call the company that designed the website so they could get the email page fixed!
Dingwell: (He tried calling the people that make the website directly?
) Ok, well, I do apologize for that. Why don't we see if we can get this to work properly. This might be a problem with your browser.Nitpicker: I tried six different browsers. Internet Explorer, Netscape, Mozilla, Firefox, MSN....every one I could think of. The problem still happens. It's bad code on the page.
Dingwell: Ok, well, if you set up a email program like Outlook Express you may have a better result with that email.
Nitpicker: I already have it set up. It works fine in that program. I want the WEBPAGE fixed.
Dingwell: Sir, I logged directly into the Kersnizon email and I don't see any of the issues you're describing. the email loaded perfectly for me.
Nitpicker: I've tried this on 15 different computers and it loads wrong no matter what browser I try. This needs to be fixed!
Dingwell: Ok, well, if we go to http://email.kersnizon.com do you have the same problem on that page?
Nitpicker: No! That page works fine! I already told you this only happens if you try and go to the email from The Kersnizon homepage!
(And right there, his true nature is revealed. He's a nitpicker. He already has two seperate solutions to the problem, Email programs like Outlook Express or he can use the direct access to email website. But no, he's upset because a link on the homepage is loading a malfuctioning page. For this, he tried the page on 15 different computers, loaded and tried six different browsers and contacted us 11 times in 3 days.
)Dingwell: Ok, sir, really, there isn't anything that I can do about this. I have no access to the code on the website, the page is actually consistently under construction and there will be issues like this from time to time. It's not something that I can fix for you and I do apologize for that.
Nitpicker: Fine! Thanks for wasting my time! (Ends Session.)
I'd like to point out that if you tried fifteen different computers, six different browsers and called or contacted us 11 times in three days for an issue that you already knew how to work around that perhaps it wasn't me that was wasting your valuable time.
And can you imagine if a Ms. Nitpicker had babies with a Mr. Volcanic? Good lord, the apocolypse would be nigh I tell you...
Dingwell
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