March of the maroons.

[ThePhoneGoddess]

They're all maroons today, I swear.

maroon #1

me: I'm sorry, your account has had a hold placed on it by the chargeback department due to a disputed charge. You'll need to speak to them to get that straightened out before we can accept anymore orders.
sc: What do you mean, disputed?
me: someone has called us and said there were unauthorized charges on their cc that had been charged to your account. (read:FRAUD).
sc: Ok, well then I'll just use a different card.
me: I'm sorry, we cannot place any orders at all for this phone until that is straightened out.
sc: I don't understand.
me: well there are unauthorized charges on this account. We need to get that straightened out first.
sc: but I'm using a different card!
me: That doesn't matter, ma'am. There is fraudulent activity on this account, so we are not accepting charges until it's taken care of.
sc: well I don't understand why I just can't use a different card. The problem is with that card, isn't it? I can't believe this! I need to put minutes on my phone right now!
me: Because, ma'am, we've received a report of fraudulent activity on this
account. We've frozen the whole account until it's taken care of.
sc: this is ridiculous. I'M NOT USING THAT CARD! I don't understand why you can't just take an order using a different payment method. That chargeback thing only applies to that credit card!
me: no actually ma'am it applies ot the entire account. If one card is being used fraudulently, how do we know that others aren't also?
sc: well this is unbelieveable. I just don't understand why I can't place another order.
me: well ma'am because you're using SOMEONE ELSE'S CARD and that is very very VERY illegal!

Boy that shut her up.

maroon #2

*guy had a bounced check. he was sent to pre-collect. He apparently paid after much bitching about how it was bank's fault check bounced, not his. When you bounce, we block the account. When you pay it's unblocked but we do a security verification thing where we call the bank to verify funds and stuff. Well he paid earlier but called wanting to place an order, and his bank was closed. We couldn't verify funds.*
sc: (when he first gets on the phone) I just spoke to a girl and she was the stupidest person I've ever had to deal with.
me: Ohhhhhkayyyyy....let me take a look at your order. (After trying to contact bank) I'm sorry your bank is closed for the night, you'll need to replace this order during banking hours.
sc: So you're telling me I can't put minutes on the phone right now.
me: (thinking, yes that's correct Captain Obvious!) No sir. you'll need to call back when your bank is open.
sc:But I've placed many orders with this checking account with you all.
me: Yes sir I see that but I need to verify info on this account before we can put an order thru.
sc: Well I guess you're just incompetent then aren't you! ****(name of cell phone co) is just totally effing incompetent! fine. cancel my order. I'm never doing business with you idiots again!
me: (rather amused at this childish display) ok, no problem.
sc: I can't believe you're doing this to me! ***** is a goddamn motherflushing incompetent company that can't do anything right!
me: whatever you say sir.
sc: are you laughing at me? ARE YOU LAUGHING AT ME?!
me: (trying to hold it in) Your order had been cancelled, I hope you have a nice day.
sc: I'm going to another cell phone company, you incompetent B****. Tell that to your managers.
me: Sure! We also do these verifications for cell phone companies A, B, C, and D. So if you get a phone through any of them you will come right back to this department. thank you and have a great day!

sc is utterly speechless at this.

[Ljt09863]

just out of curiosity, did you mean moron? cause,ya know...maroon is a color...unless i missed something

[Imogene]

just out of curiosity, did you mean moron? cause,ya know...maroon is a color...unless i missed something

As the great Bugs Bunny used to say...

"What a maroon!"

[Gurndigarn]

just out of curiosity, did you mean moron? cause,ya know...maroon is a color...unless i missed something

It's an alternate way of saying "moron". A variant of the to-may-to/to-mah-to debate.

[ThePhoneGoddess]

as Juwl said...

I was quoting Bugs Bunny.

It surprises me how many people have never heard that.

It's just slang for moron...

[cpux]

Indeed. I grew up on Looney Tunes, and to this day I think of "maroon" as a synonym for "idiot" rather than for the color.

[Jester]

I think of it as both.

My second high school's colors were maroon and white. I hated my time at that school. Maroons are idiots.

My college's colors are maroon and gold. Maroon is a great color.

No, there is no contradiction. Now, shut up and drink!

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

I got it right away, but then again Bugs was my hero. I credit him for my wisecracking ability.

You say to-may-to, I say to-mah-to...Lets just forget about the whole thing and get a cheesburger

[misfit2778]

Attack of the evil family....

I've had major dealings with this one customer and her daughter on several situations.... the mother is cheap and does most of her purchases at other locations of my brand store... but does the returns at mine.... she wanted a price adjustment and the recept was almost a month old and we only do an adjustment for upto 2 wks.... Mother flipped on me so I offered to return and rebuy the items at their new discounted prices... a one time offer right??? NOT WITH THIS ONE!!!! she then says " Great I will bring the rest on Friday" I groaned to myself and didnt say a word... HOW COULD I???? so that done I tell my manager on duty that the woman would be back... skip ahead to Friday... I am off and my mentioned manager was on... she got stuck assisting the customers from hell... I did neglect to mention that every time they come in the mother is verbally abusive to anyone who takes her transaction.. so most of the cashers hide and I get stuck with her..... my poor manager got into a dispute with the mother and in return the mother threw our signature pad/card swiping machine at her.. thankfully it was on a wire or she would have been clocked with the machine....
skip ahead to monday after the "attack" they walk into my store.. after i was told the story by my manager... I politely said hello to them and the mother muttered some things and curses under her breath... knowing she was in rare form I notified my said mentioned manager that "her favorite customers where in the store" to which her reaction was she turned pale and whipped around to look at me with horror... "ARE YOU JOKING?????" she asked me over the walkie... " nope they are in the back of the store right now" figuring telling her would allow her to hide in another part of the store and making one of the other managers handle any problems with these people.... the daughter was walking up the center isle of the store as i stepped from my register to fold one of the front tables ( managers orders no standing around... no customers go fold something!!!) a coworker couldnt find where something was hung I asked did he look at the tag (sometimes our tags had little letters telling us where in the store they go) I laughed at him and pointed him in the right direction... all said actions were turned into a paranoid conspiracy..... she demanded from the other casher to speak to a manager... my poor mentioned manager was the one to respond to the call.. the customer refused to speak with her because " of the incident the other day"... so the CSM came out and tried to speak logically with her... to which her response was to curse and get nasty and hostle with my CSM as she normally did with the cashers. I of course was called into the office to discuss the incident... my CSM was quick to try and releave my dismay to the talking to... I told her what they twisted into a conspiracy was really simple everyday tasks that ive done a million times over... "Well taking into consideration the actions of Friday and her tone and attitude with me right now and how well I know you if there is a call to corperate I will defend you and your actions... RELAX" How can you relax when people like this have to be treated with more respect than they give us???

[Crosshair]

I keep waiting for a customer like the ones you describe to pull that stuff while trying to buy a gun. I can deny the sale for ANY reason. If the customer is being hostile to a salesperson they have every right to deny that sale.

We are very close to telling one customer to (Something that begins with a F and ends with a F) and deny his sale. He came into our store 4 days before deer season wanting to buy a rifle for deer hunting. Fine, we fill out the 4473 and call NICS for an instant background check. Normally this takes no more than 30 seconds once we give them the info. We either get a Proceed (Everything is OK, go ahead.), Delayed (Hold on, we need to double check something.), or Denied (Don't sell this person anything more lethal than a BB gun.)

Well this person got a Delayed responce. There is nothing wrong with this. Usualy NICS calls back in a day or so with a responce. Most of the time it is "Proceed" and once and awhile we get a "Denied" responce. However it is taking NICS a VERY long time for this guy and he is not happy. He calls every few days and asks if we have gotten a reply. (We have his phone number so we WILL call him when we get a reply.) We call NICS to check the status and it is still Delayed. He then gets pissed at US for something that is not out fault. (Not to mention that you should have your deer rifle LONG before the season opens and not wait until the last minute.) He has not been too bad, but we are getting very anoyed and he keeps calling dispite us asking him not to. Management is getting tired of him as well as he takes up their time complaining over the phone.

He keeps threatening to go somewhere else. Guess what bub, the "other place" is gona call NICS too and that second check is gona raise red flags. You will get yet another delayed responce that will take even longer to sort out.

/Loves working the sporting goods counter.

[AFpheonix]

. I did neglect to mention that every time they come in the mother is verbally abusive to anyone who takes her transaction.. so most of the cashers hide and I get stuck with her..... my poor manager got into a dispute with the mother and in return the mother threw our signature pad/card swiping machine at her.. thankfully it was on a wire or she would have been clocked with the machine....

And why in the hell didn't the manager ban her fugly ass? I'm sorry, attempted destruction of store property not to mention attempted assault should pretty much ensure that that woman never ever sets foot in that store again.