ITT: Your most memorable "I'll see you fired!" tales of horror

[MercenaryMuffin]

We've all been there. You're just trying to do your job, and something upsets a customer/guest. Instead of acting rationally (perish the thought!), the customer/guest decides the only course of action is to threaten you with the loss of your job.
Inevitably, nothing comes of it, except another few hours of annoyance. Is this some sort of fall-back I don't know about? You REALLY want to make me lose my job over something so trivial, especially in this economy? I just don't get it.

So, my most recent in a long line of people threatening to make me lose my job happened a few weeks ago. It was about 1am, and some band members were just coming back from the opening of a new casino/resort out here. They're pretty cool guys, never cause any problems. They said they were going up to their rooms to change and they'd be back down to go have some drinks at the bar across from us. Hey, no worries. They're well-behaved.

No sooner do they get upstairs than do I get a call from room 439. Uh oh.

Me = durr
EB = Entitlement Bitch

*phone rings*
Me: "Good evening, front desk."
EB: "Yes, hi, umm, I need to make a complaint about room 437..."
Me: *FRAK!* "Sure, what seems to be the problem?"
EB: "It's one in the morning and I'm trying to sleep, and the people in the next room are talking."
Me: "Talking? They're not yelling or anything, ma'am?"
EB: "Oh no, they're just talking. I want you to tell them to stop it."
Me: "...you want me to tell them to stop talking."
EB: "Yes. I have a meeting in the morning and I need my sleep and you need to do something about this!"
Me: "Ma'am, the gentlemen who just came in that room are simply changing so that they can head out for the night. They haven't caused any problems in the nights they've been here, and I'm sure they understand that people around them are sleeping. They're not yelling, or fighting, or playing loud music, correct?"
EB: "Yes, but-"
Me: "Well then I don't see a problem, ma'am..."
EB: "Well I need my sleep and I can't sleep with them talking!"
Me: "Ma'am, the walls in our hotel are, unfortunately, pretty thin. Sound does travel through them fairly easily, I'm afraid. Now they should be out of there shortly, but-"
*cutting me off*
EB: "NO. I want them to stop it RIGHT NOW. I am a DIAMOND MEMBER (oooh, big freakin' deal, so is everyone else), and I want you to move them to another room!"
Me: "...ma'am, I can't move them to another room."
EB: "Well why the hell not?! I need my sleep and I have a meeting and-"
::I stopped listening while she ranted::
Me: "I understand, and like I was saying, I'd be happy to comp your room if it continues, or reward your stay with double the points you'd usually receive. However, I can't move the people next door because you want me to. Our policy is to move someone from their own room if they want to be moved. I can not move someone else because they're holding a conversation at a reasonable volume."
EB: "I DEMAND you make them stop! Do you hear me?! I am a DIAMOND MEMBER!"
Me: "Yes, I heard you mention that before. And like I said, I'm sorry if it's keeping you awake (which it shouldn't, crazy bitch), but I can't very well tell them to stop talking entirely."
EB: "Well then I'm just going to have to call the Diamond Desk, and I'll see your ass gets fired!!!"
*hangs up on me*
Me: "...wow..."

Sure enough, two minutes later, the Diamond Desk (which I didn't even know existed) calls up and asks me what happened to Entitlement Bitch. I explained how I offered to comp the room, etc., and the woman told me that this wasn't the first time this has happened, and EB had threatened to get other employees fired as well. So I didn't worry about it.

I did, however, inform the band guys in the room next to her that they had a crazy lady in the next room

If I had a dollar for every time someone said they'd get me fired, I swear...

[Mr Hero]

I don't think it's ever happened to me, but it happened to my GM. Last year we had this EW stay with us. Problem is that she paid in cash one night and getting cash for additional nights was like pulling teeth. Housekeeping discovered a dog in the room which she did not declare so we had to collect for that.

GM was getting pretty sick her and laid the smack down. She either needed to comply with the rules or GTFO. EW didn't like this that much and confided with me (for some reason she got along with me) that she was going to have my GM's job for being racist. I passed this on to our GM and he just did that dismissal hand-wave.

Note1: This is the first time I've heard of a white person playing the race card. She's white. He's Indian. Just about (if not all) the front desk staff was white. He's obviously not that racist if he hired a bunch of whities.

Note2: He's still at the hotel, but she's banned.

[thehippie777]

ah, Diamond Desk...Hilton Corp. See, I have more issues with Silvers...yes silvers... lol

It amazes me the little bullshit things people complain about. Tonight even we had a lady interrupt me while I was checking in another guest with a "Hey!...There are little kids in the pool all alone!! (She even managed to shove herself infront of the person I was checking in...wow class!)" The guest infront of me was like, What the hell? I told the lady I would look into it once I got this gentlement checked in. Her response, "It's dangerous!!!!!!!", and stomped off & Yes, she yelled. Wow ya know? Come to find out, their parents were watching them from outside the pool area. Friggn busy bodies!

OMG They are talking!?!?! Who does that?!?! Evil bastards...

[MercenaryMuffin]

I hate HHonors people. I hate them with the fiery rage of a thousand curry bowls.

Oh, look at you, you're SO SPECIAL because you signed up to a free program. Okay, you stay frequently. That's great. It doesn't entitle you to be a crazy bitch.

What really annoys me is when someone very obviously tries to get a free room, because of our "100% Smamptom" guarantee. They'll make shit up all day. I had one guy try to say he couldn't sleep because the outdoor light was shining through his window, and he couldn't find the blackout curtains...even though I had told him THE WEEK BEFORE where the blackout curtains were.
He didn't get a free room.

I also get the whole "There's X left in my room" ordeal. "X" can be anything from dirty sheets (not possible) to bloody tissues (totally not possible) to freakin' half-eaten cookies. That we just made an hour earlier. That they grabbed. And are trying to claim was left in their room by someone else.

Sigh.

One day I'll have to write about the crazy strip club owner lady and her drug-addled, ghost-catching son. Oh lordy.

[thehippie777]

Yeah.... For the most part, honestly, 98% of our guests are fine, although be them often picky. I don't mind Hhonors people, but you are totally right about them being EW's for a FREE program. If they paid a yearly fee, things might be different. And I appreciate the business cuz it pays me...but wow.

Do you have people think they get discounts on their room because they are members?? That still confounds me. lol

The "100% bitch about anything, no pay" idea is good in theory, bad in practice. We want our guests happy, but have to put up with dealing with scammers, too.

I have had people have issues with the black-out curtains, too. Cuz they are like not there, but magically appeared when I showed them where they are! Oh lordy! We also have temp control thermistats on our walls rather then on the HVAC unit, and that throws people for a loop. It's just like home! Insanity! Our TV's are also too complicated, too. Cuz...guests have to read what is on the screen to get regular tv channels! aaaahhh!

I wish it weren't possible here to have dirty sheets etc...but...it is. Montana is grabbing the dreggs of life just to have an okay head housekeeper... So, in that area, I envy you.

Just the "crazy strip club owner" idea scares me...but yet I am strangely intrigued!

[Victoria J]

EB: "NO. I want them to stop it RIGHT NOW. I am a DIAMOND MEMBER (oooh, big freakin' deal, so is everyone else), and I want you to move them to another room!"
Me: "...ma'am, I can't move them to another room."
EB: "Well why the hell not?! I need my sleep and I have a meeting and-"
::I stopped listening while she ranted::
Me: "I understand, and like I was saying, I'd be happy to comp your room if it continues, or reward your stay with double the points you'd usually receive. However, I can't move the people next door because you want me to. Our policy is to move someone from their own room if they want to be moved. I can not move someone else because they're holding a conversation at a reasonable volume."
EB: "I DEMAND you make them stop! Do you hear me?! I am a DIAMOND MEMBER!"
Me: "Yes, I heard you mention that before. And like I said, I'm sorry if it's keeping you awake (which it shouldn't, crazy bitch), but I can't very well tell them to stop talking entirely."

Was that her raising her voice

Because if so the correct response is surely along the lines of "I'm going to have to ask you not to raise your voice as people will be sleeping at this time " followed if she keeps it up with "You are disturbing other guests. If you continue to shout I'll have to ask you to leave". Then throwing her out before she disturbs the nicer people in the room next door...

But I'm evil.

Though I'd be a bit annoyed at a hotel with such thin walls that I could clearly hear the next room when they weren't being noisy.

Victoria J

[Canarr]

Sigh.

One day I'll have to write about the crazy strip club owner lady and her drug-addled, ghost-catching son. Oh lordy.

One day? How about to-day? Pretty please?

[MercenaryMuffin]

Oh yes, people want discounted rates all the time, just for being HHonors members. Sorry, doesn't work that way!

What really gets me are these hookers (sorry, "professional escorts") that pop into the hotel a few times a month, usually during peak tourist days.
Since we're away from the strip, we don't get as many as the bigger hotels, but still...it's very obvious who the hookers are.

They're always scantily clad, no matter the weather, with some nervous-looking guy twice their age (I thought the last hooker to come in was someone's daughter at first), and they always pay in cash. Always. They have an annoying habit of calling me "sweetie" for some reason...I am NOT your John, lady.

Then they'll "use" the room for 2 hours, and check out.

I feel so sorry for the housekeeping staff, they must deal with some nasty bed sheets...

[MercenaryMuffin]

One day? How about to-day? Pretty please?

I suppose I can do that

So, about six months ago, around Christmas, we had a woman in her 40's stay with us, along with her son. The woman was, she claimed, a strip club owner. Oddly enough, this did not surprise me. I've heard waaaay weirder out here.

They stayed for three days, during which time they were decently respectful...the mother was gone most of the day, and the son usually left early in the morning to go party (we knew this because he'd come back wasted/high every night). She even offered to give us free drinks and lapdances at the club she owned...though she never mentioned what club it was O_o

When they checked out...oh lordy. THAT is when the shit hit the fan.

First of all, there was drug paraphernalia [B]everywhere[B]. Used needles in the trash, razor blades and small mirrors on the desk (covered in crack powder, of course), at least two pipes, tons of bottles of booze...WTF kind of family is this?! Talk about dysfunctional.

But that's not all. They had apparently decided to write "THEYRE WATCHING US" all over the bathroom mirror in permanent marker. They burned holes in the duvet covers, they ripped open a pillow and scattered the feathers everywhere (WHY?!), and to top it all off...they had strips of packing tape hanging from the ceiling. Dozens of them, like flypaper.

Well obviously this can't be tolerated, and they were both arrested in short order. Apparently when our manager asked them why they'd hung strips of tape up, the mother replied very calmly: "To catch the ghosts, of course."



You can't make this stuff up.

[Canarr]

"Truth is stranger than fiction, because fiction has to make sense?"

Okay, seriously, some people are... strange. But thanks for the quick "delivery"!

[LillFilly]

Oh gads, had a room like that. 17 year olds with parent's credit card. Did $2,000 in damage to the room before we kicked them out. How do you BREAK a mattress!???

On another note, I've been told by people they're going to get me fired for things like asking them to move their vehicles from the fire lane, or not being able to do anything about something they're complaining about because it's either physically impossible or the complaint doesn't exist.

[dougall]

Thats just silly it's a well known fact that you need to use silver duct tape to catch ghosts

[EricKei]

Oh yes, people want discounted rates all the time, just for being HHonors members. Sorry, doesn't work that way!

What really gets me are these hookers (sorry, "professional escorts") that pop into the hotel a few times a month, usually during peak tourist days.
Since we're away from the strip, we don't get as many as the bigger hotels, but still...it's very obvious who the hookers are.

...

Then they'll "use" the room for 2 hours, and check out.

It's for that reason that a law was passed here a few years ago which prohibits the local "no-tell motels" from renting our rooms in 1-2 hour blocks. I think the minimum is either 12 or 24 hours/one day now. Granted, that just means that the Johns are paying more for their 2-hour stays, but still...

[MercenaryMuffin]

Off the top of my head, I have been threatened with the loss of my job for:

-Asking someone to please turn down their TV
-Refusing to open up the gym an hour ahead of schedule
-"Being the only rude little shit in this whole place!"
-Telling someone they couldn't smoke in a non-smoking hotel
-Telling a guest we must have a credit card on file
-Refusing to let a non-employee have a room for the employee rate
-Waking someone up after they passed out on the lobby couch for two hours


You know what situation I dread the most? Noise complaints. Specifically, the kind of noises made when two people really care about each other...over and over.
Because, really...what am I supposed to do? Call up the room and be like "Sir, I need you to tell your girlfriend to keep it down"?

[Sheldonrs]

Only happened to me once. And fortunately, it happened when i worked at the Univ. text book store and the manager was on the side of right, not the customer.

Bitch had just bought books the previous day and wanted to return them. She had paid by check so the policy was we had to wait for the check to clear before we could issue a refund. I gave her her IOU receipt and she started yelling that she wanted her money NOW! I told her about waiting for the check to clear but she just started slamming her hands down on the counter telling me if I didn't give her her cash NOW, she would get me fired. I told her "Bitch, if something like you can get me fired from ANY job, the job's not worth having."
My boss heard that and laughed his ass off. She left.