The Little Things

[Anriana]

I know computers are scary new technology. I understand that not everyone knows the difference between a modem and a router or the proper term for the monitor or what a browser is. But TV? TV is not new. It has been here for 50 years. You should know the words for remote control. It is not a zapper, pointer, clicker, masher, tapper, or changer. It is a REMOTE CONTROL. I know that's a whole four syllables long and really hard to say, but you can do it!

There is a difference between your computer and the internet. There is also a difference between your television set and your cable box. I slightly understand people who say "My puter be broken" because, again, computers are scary new technology, but why is it difficult to understand the diff between the TV and the cable box? Why do I keep having this conversation:

"Okay, what channel is the TV on?"
"Your box says 7."
"Okay. What channel is the TV on?"
"The box says 7!!!!"
"I understand that. What about the TV?"
"IT SAYS 7!!!!!!!!"
"Okay... can you walk to the TV?"
"OMG it's 3 feet away I don't want to have to walk this is ridiculous!!!"
"Let me know when you're there."
"Yeah I walked ALL that way there. What do you want now?"
"Can you press the channel up button on the TV?"
"God, give me a minute to find this, blah blah blah, oh hey my picture's back now! Bye."


E-mail is sent via the internet. I know you think that magical pigeons carry your emails around or something, but it goes via the internet. Stop saying "My internet AND my email are down."

It will not hurt your computer to have more than one window open, no matter how crappy it is. You don't have to close the command prompt or the control panel or ANY windows to open internet explorer. Stop asking.

If it matters if the letters are in capital letters, I will tell you. If it doesn't, just type them in lower case and don't ask!

When I tell you letters and I say "as in <word>" after, it's not because I'm just having fun thinking of words that start with the letter and they're completely irrelevant. I'm sure you spend your days going "C? C like... like... like... Charlie! Hey, my name is Charlie! How cool! Yay I said Charlie!" but I am saying those words for a reason. So stop having this conversation with me:
"F as in Foxtrot."
"Okay, S"
"No, F as in Foxtrot."
"Right, S."
"No, F as in... fire, Ferrari, feline" or fuck you.
"Uh... so.... S..."
"Can I put you in the dunce corner on hold please?"

[moogie]

I have met someone that calls the remote "the box" O_o

and someone else that calls a controller a "paddle" seriously? why?

[CorDarei]

HAH!

I just got one of these (paraphrased):

Me: the user name is administrator
Him: how do you spell that?
Me: a-d-m-i-n-i-s-t-
Him: how do you spell the last part?
Me: t-r-a-t-o-r, like traitor, without the I.

i hear typing in the background.

Him: It's still not working, can you spell it again?
Me: a-d-m-i-n-i-s-t-r-a-t-o-r
Him: Ok... still not working, how do you spell the part after the S?
Me: One moment while I connect to your pc remotely....

He had it spelled adminastrator.

What can you do besides

[CorDarei]

I have met someone that calls the remote "the box" O_o

and someone else that calls a controller a "paddle" seriously? why?

probably because back in the day, remotes were boxy


and as far as a controller being called a paddle, i think you can blame atari for that one. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atari_Paddle

[sms001]

For some strange reason whose origins are lost in a haze of ...er, time, my crowd used to call the remote the 'norbulator.' Bet that would have thrown a phone tech for a loop!

[jiarby]

We still call our remote a "clickie"...

The 1st TV we got that used a remote control was short and stubby with only THREE BUTTONS! Power, Volume, Channel. We called a clickie because the buttons made an audible AND tactile click. The buttons were about 3/16 tall. The remote was about 1.5" thick by 4" long and 2.5" wide.

We didn't need too many buttons, there was no satellite, no cable box, no VCR, no DVD, and certainly no Tivo! I think my Mom is still using that TV in the guest bedroom.... I hope she got a digital converter box!

[GingerBiscuit]

Our remote is the 'oofer-doofer'. I'm not looking forward to ever having to speak to a tech.

[EricKei]

I've always known them as "clickers"...Or, on occasion. The "thing".

[Dave1982]

The 1st TV we got that used a remote control was short and stubby with only THREE BUTTONS! Power, Volume, Channel. We called a clickie because the buttons made an audible AND tactile click. The buttons were about 3/16 tall. The remote was about 1.5" thick by 4" long and 2.5" wide.

A true old-school remote. The very first television remotes actually worked via ultrasound. That click is actually a mechanism striking a bar tuned to make a specific sound which could be heard by a microphone in the TV. Later models used an electrically oscillating crystal to make the sound. The click of the original mechanical mechanism is where the term "clicker" comes from, which endures to this day. "Changer" (as in channel changer or volume changer) was also used but less common. So "clicker" or "changer" I think are legit terms for "remote control." THose others though.....not sure where they come from. "Zapper" in particular can refer to a number of different things.

As for "paddle," that likely comes from the Atari 2600, as has been pointed out. That system had a controller variant called a paddle (basically just a knob with a fire button on the side) that was originally made for playing Pong. The term "paddle" derives from "ping pong paddle," as the "paddle controller" was the equivalent paddle for Pong. I guess that somehow was applied by some people to other controllers and remote controls.

Either that, or some rather twisted individuals have been using remote controls to "paddle" people.

[Pagan]

I've always known them as "clickers"...Or, on occasion. The "thing".

That's what I still call it. I'll even make button-pushing motions to go with it when I'm asking where it is or looking for it.

Our first VCR had a remote....a hard-wired remote with a cord of about 6', I think. And the counter wasn't real-time.

[Food Lady]

I used to call it a clicker, but for some reason changed to remote. I understand where "clicker" came from, though, and now moreso to Dave1982.

[EricKei]

Our first VCR had a remote....a hard-wired remote with a cord of about 6', I think. And the counter wasn't real-time.

We had one of those, too. A big silver behemoth from Fischer-Price.

[Sonoma]

I remember those non real-time VCR counters. Somewhere I have a notebook cataloging tapes that I had back then, and they're based on the counter on that ancient RCA VCR. But, we did have a wireless remote - it was the fancy model.

[stucksb]

I was trained by my husband (who has now worked for two ISP's) to indicate to a technician what internet service I cannot use: No surf, No Email, Neither Email nor Surf.

Maybe the people saying the Internet and Email are down are just trying to be clear or overly specific.

[PepperElf]

I still remember our first TVs. No remotes, and we had channels 2-13 and UHF. The bigger one was in color, and the smaller one was black & white. Both had rabbit ears.

And our first remote... Man I still remember that thing... it came with the cable box.

It was a brown box with maybe 10 or 11 buttons across with another switch on the side, to select between 3 rows of channels. Oh, and it was attached to the cable-box by an 8 foot cord.

I think we still had to turn the TV off an on manually however.

OMG i found a couple of pictures of it.
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2248/...535ac33d27.jpg
http://www.electronichouse.com/image...oteControl.jpg