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Oh my!
Throw in a drug-sniffing dog, the county sheriff's department, and one batshit fricken woman, and you've got the last week.
Silly Shoplifter
We have a Darwin Award winner in the making, my friends. This kid, self-proclaimed to be eighteen, comes up Saturday night and asks for an application. He then glances over it and asks, LOUDLY, what it means when it asks "Would you be able to pass a physical?"
Erm... It means... Well, it's asking if you'd be able to go to your doctor and have him not declare you physically inept? We can't do much about the brain, but we also don't always hire the brightest crayons either, so you're set. But it took a good ten minutes to explain this to the kid.
Better yet, I come in the next morning to find that he'd swiped a couple bottles of cough syrup from us.
Yes. That's right. He stole from us and then asked us for an application.
Now we're just waiting for him to bring it back in
Too Many Cops @_@
The morning after the kid comes in, we called in an officer to review the tapes as protocol commands. When said officer arrives, he discovers a man parked in our fire lane inside putting redeemable bottles through our machines.
When they tell him to go move his truck, they see a little baggy of white powder that probably shouldn't be there and ask the special, special man for his license. He procures this magical document and, surprise surprise, it's suspended.
Since the town I work in doesn't have it's own drug-sniffing dog, the county sheriff was called in so we could use theirs. They did find some other goodies in the guy's truck and he was hauled away in cuffs while the officers summoned a tow truck.
They then had to call up a different officer to deal with watching the tape. We then had two local officers, and two county officers in and around our store.
Wait... What Now?
I've mentioned this woman before. She goes through the store singing little tunes with no words and mumbling to herself. She also always tells us about her problems with things like her bladder
Well, she's gone to a new level of crazy. She doesn't want any males bagging her groceries. This makes all of us WTF, but her explanation as to why is even more baffling.
This story starts about two weeks ago with one of my fellow SL's. He went to go bag her groceries for her and she says she'll do it herself. Okay. Nothing unusual about that, we have people who want to bag their own all the time. Okay by us since some people are fricken nuts when it comes to how their shit's bagged.
However, another SL, this time a female, who didn't hear her say she wanted to bag it herself comes over and asks if she'd like help. She accepts and the order progresses. All of a sudden, she decides to declare to the cashier and anyone else within hearing distance of her (i.e. the entire store because she's LOUD):
"I don't want any men bagging for me! I have enough urinary problems as it is!"
Wait... What the fuck? Seriously. WHAT THE FUCK?! Apparently we have magical sanitary elves that pop in every evening for her convenience because EVERY person who stocks in our store is a guy. But this doesn't bother her, oh no. She just doesn't want anyone from the male species bagging her precious alcohol and pepto.
It gets even better when earlier this past week, one of our baggers started to bag her order. She went a got a new fucking bottle of vodka because he'd touched it.
I swear, this woman is becoming one of my favorite people ever. Though I can't look at her without laughing any more.
Throw in a drug-sniffing dog, the county sheriff's department, and one batshit fricken woman, and you've got the last week.
Silly Shoplifter
We have a Darwin Award winner in the making, my friends. This kid, self-proclaimed to be eighteen, comes up Saturday night and asks for an application. He then glances over it and asks, LOUDLY, what it means when it asks "Would you be able to pass a physical?"
Erm... It means... Well, it's asking if you'd be able to go to your doctor and have him not declare you physically inept? We can't do much about the brain, but we also don't always hire the brightest crayons either, so you're set. But it took a good ten minutes to explain this to the kid.
Better yet, I come in the next morning to find that he'd swiped a couple bottles of cough syrup from us.
Yes. That's right. He stole from us and then asked us for an application.
Now we're just waiting for him to bring it back in
Too Many Cops @_@
The morning after the kid comes in, we called in an officer to review the tapes as protocol commands. When said officer arrives, he discovers a man parked in our fire lane inside putting redeemable bottles through our machines.
When they tell him to go move his truck, they see a little baggy of white powder that probably shouldn't be there and ask the special, special man for his license. He procures this magical document and, surprise surprise, it's suspended.
Since the town I work in doesn't have it's own drug-sniffing dog, the county sheriff was called in so we could use theirs. They did find some other goodies in the guy's truck and he was hauled away in cuffs while the officers summoned a tow truck.
They then had to call up a different officer to deal with watching the tape. We then had two local officers, and two county officers in and around our store.
Wait... What Now?
I've mentioned this woman before. She goes through the store singing little tunes with no words and mumbling to herself. She also always tells us about her problems with things like her bladder
Well, she's gone to a new level of crazy. She doesn't want any males bagging her groceries. This makes all of us WTF, but her explanation as to why is even more baffling.
This story starts about two weeks ago with one of my fellow SL's. He went to go bag her groceries for her and she says she'll do it herself. Okay. Nothing unusual about that, we have people who want to bag their own all the time. Okay by us since some people are fricken nuts when it comes to how their shit's bagged.
However, another SL, this time a female, who didn't hear her say she wanted to bag it herself comes over and asks if she'd like help. She accepts and the order progresses. All of a sudden, she decides to declare to the cashier and anyone else within hearing distance of her (i.e. the entire store because she's LOUD):
"I don't want any men bagging for me! I have enough urinary problems as it is!"
Wait... What the fuck? Seriously. WHAT THE FUCK?! Apparently we have magical sanitary elves that pop in every evening for her convenience because EVERY person who stocks in our store is a guy. But this doesn't bother her, oh no. She just doesn't want anyone from the male species bagging her precious alcohol and pepto.
It gets even better when earlier this past week, one of our baggers started to bag her order. She went a got a new fucking bottle of vodka because he'd touched it.
I swear, this woman is becoming one of my favorite people ever. Though I can't look at her without laughing any more.
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