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Bored, once again, at my current job. many of you will probably know me as the guy who writes the "shore thing" horror stories I had to live through. well, college is over... 2 years ago, and as an independant animator there is one thing I must do... get a normal job to suplement the slow months. it's rule one, and I was lucky enough to get an easy 5 day a week, 40 hour job with high pay... no benefits, but I'll survive.
anyway, some back story before I go into some short stories. before I got this job I refused to work in the food industry again. I had enough of it for 5 years and I didn't want it anymore. so I searched and searched and found a nice easy "head shipper" job at a store near rittenhouse square in sunny ol' philly. it's a store filled with VERY expensive items that are expensive because they are made by hand... and not by children in 3rd world countries. to give you an idea, I recently shipped a soup ladel to a young lady in arizona... this ladel was $650... a large spoon.... anyway, my responsibilities are: manuel labor, shipping, stock, web photos (once they discovered I had an animation degree that also studies in photography) and web updates.
that's enough of that, off to some short stories.
you pack too well!!!
being the head shipper, and rarely in the store, I don't interact with customers much. but sometimes I get phone calls (some phonebook somewhere has the warehouse number for some reason) and this is how this went.
Me; meeee
SC: rich snob
ME: *exensive* gifts shipping department, how may I help you?
SC: ah good, just who I want to talk to
*already I was taken aback because normally I just give the store number*
ME: ok
SC: I recently got an order delivered and I have a problem with it.
ME: is it broken?
SC: no it's perfect
*oh... ok*
SC: it's the packing job
ME: I don't understand
SC: I'm the head of the enviornmental insitute of Oaklahoma (not the name, but i dont remember exactly) and you put a far too small item in a large box filled with packing peanuts! that is wasteful and bad for the enviornment!
ME:.... what was the item again sir?
SC: two candle holders.
*ah ha! we are a small store, so we can only afford to get 8 different shipping box sizes. when we have a long item like that, I am forced to use a larger box because we just don't have one at that odd shape. so it leaves alot of empty space. it was ceramic, so I couldn't use paper.
ME: ahhh I see, *I explain our situation with boxes (minus us being small)*
SC: that's not very good! you need to make sure you don't ever do this again or I am reporting you!
ME: sir... the packing peanuts are recyclable, and cardboard bio degrades.
SC: don't do it again!!!!
*click*
so, we get another order from him... so I cut down and modify a box so small that it nearly hugs the sides of the item, to kind of mock him. no response from it tho
him complaining about that is if I called coke and complained about their tin cans. it's no longer my responsibility, they are reuseable!.. ugh
shifty people need not apply
being a store with so many expensive items we get some shoplifters. you would think it would be very easy to spot them, being a specialty store, small and normal lower class folk wouldn't even bother looking at the sign (let alone shop in the district I work... hell I don't even shop there). but we get shop lifters... how?
OLD LADIES! seriously... old rich ladies who sit at home all day while their wealthy business husband is parading around the world, come to our store... and shop lift from us. never anything big, mostly just butter dishes... for some reason. but their lives must be so boring that they risk being caught and shop lift from us.
"can't you see I'm dying... now let me go I have more stuff to steal"
points to anyone who gets that reference
bad first impression
My last sucky story at this job... working here for 2 years... that's pretty damned good.
anyway, I was working in the warehouse (which is situated above another store, so we have a door that says private and stairs that lead up to where I work) bring shipping boxes in from the delivery guy. it sucked bringing them up the stairs, but it only happens once a month. just as I got the last box up I hear this.
me: meee
LG: loud guy
LG: YOOOOO!
*I look up and around.... nothing.... go back to work*
LG: YOOOOO!
*I realize its coming from the stairs so I get to the top of them and look down. there is a guy, who opened our door with a big ol' "PRIVATE" on the glass, yelling at me*
ME: uhhh... yea?
LG: YOYOUHIRIN'
ME: .... what?
LG: ARR YuUUU HAIRin'
ME: um... no
LG: oh ok
and he leaves. i step down to close the door and watch him... he goes from door to door (doesn't matter if it says private or no enterence) opens them, and yells what he yelled at me. he did it in a cafe next door... and again when he rounded the corner and found their other door.
not a real good way to get a job...
*bonus rant*
my door to my warehouse is next to a store. that store has a long window before it reached my door, and both our doors and the window have an awning above them. I get about 2-3 people a day who sit/stand/lean on my door, causing me to open it and ask them to move as I am holding very heavy very expensive things. THERE IS A HUGE WINDOW and a wall just 5 ft away, that is covered... why the hell would you stand infront of a door when it rains or when it's a bit sunny out! it's a door!!! you don't stand in doors!
I once had a guy open my door, come in, and sit on my steps (inside!!!) and light up a smoke (which I am allergic to). I thought someone accidently opened it and moved on, until I smelled it and had to yell at the asshole. "HEY! the door says private! get the F out!" (bad day).... ugh... people.
there probably won't be anymore shipping tales. not enough customer interaction........ oh wait 
anyway, some back story before I go into some short stories. before I got this job I refused to work in the food industry again. I had enough of it for 5 years and I didn't want it anymore. so I searched and searched and found a nice easy "head shipper" job at a store near rittenhouse square in sunny ol' philly. it's a store filled with VERY expensive items that are expensive because they are made by hand... and not by children in 3rd world countries. to give you an idea, I recently shipped a soup ladel to a young lady in arizona... this ladel was $650... a large spoon.... anyway, my responsibilities are: manuel labor, shipping, stock, web photos (once they discovered I had an animation degree that also studies in photography) and web updates.
that's enough of that, off to some short stories.
you pack too well!!!
being the head shipper, and rarely in the store, I don't interact with customers much. but sometimes I get phone calls (some phonebook somewhere has the warehouse number for some reason) and this is how this went.
Me; meeee
SC: rich snob
ME: *exensive* gifts shipping department, how may I help you?
SC: ah good, just who I want to talk to
*already I was taken aback because normally I just give the store number*
ME: ok
SC: I recently got an order delivered and I have a problem with it.
ME: is it broken?
SC: no it's perfect
*oh... ok*
SC: it's the packing job
ME: I don't understand
SC: I'm the head of the enviornmental insitute of Oaklahoma (not the name, but i dont remember exactly) and you put a far too small item in a large box filled with packing peanuts! that is wasteful and bad for the enviornment!
ME:.... what was the item again sir?
SC: two candle holders.
*ah ha! we are a small store, so we can only afford to get 8 different shipping box sizes. when we have a long item like that, I am forced to use a larger box because we just don't have one at that odd shape. so it leaves alot of empty space. it was ceramic, so I couldn't use paper.
ME: ahhh I see, *I explain our situation with boxes (minus us being small)*
SC: that's not very good! you need to make sure you don't ever do this again or I am reporting you!
ME: sir... the packing peanuts are recyclable, and cardboard bio degrades.
SC: don't do it again!!!!
*click*
so, we get another order from him... so I cut down and modify a box so small that it nearly hugs the sides of the item, to kind of mock him. no response from it tho
him complaining about that is if I called coke and complained about their tin cans. it's no longer my responsibility, they are reuseable!.. ugh
shifty people need not apply
being a store with so many expensive items we get some shoplifters. you would think it would be very easy to spot them, being a specialty store, small and normal lower class folk wouldn't even bother looking at the sign (let alone shop in the district I work... hell I don't even shop there). but we get shop lifters... how?
OLD LADIES! seriously... old rich ladies who sit at home all day while their wealthy business husband is parading around the world, come to our store... and shop lift from us. never anything big, mostly just butter dishes... for some reason. but their lives must be so boring that they risk being caught and shop lift from us.
"can't you see I'm dying... now let me go I have more stuff to steal"
points to anyone who gets that reference
bad first impression
My last sucky story at this job... working here for 2 years... that's pretty damned good.
anyway, I was working in the warehouse (which is situated above another store, so we have a door that says private and stairs that lead up to where I work) bring shipping boxes in from the delivery guy. it sucked bringing them up the stairs, but it only happens once a month. just as I got the last box up I hear this.
me: meee
LG: loud guy
LG: YOOOOO!
*I look up and around.... nothing.... go back to work*
LG: YOOOOO!
*I realize its coming from the stairs so I get to the top of them and look down. there is a guy, who opened our door with a big ol' "PRIVATE" on the glass, yelling at me*
ME: uhhh... yea?
LG: YOYOUHIRIN'
ME: .... what?
LG: ARR YuUUU HAIRin'
ME: um... no
LG: oh ok
and he leaves. i step down to close the door and watch him... he goes from door to door (doesn't matter if it says private or no enterence) opens them, and yells what he yelled at me. he did it in a cafe next door... and again when he rounded the corner and found their other door.
not a real good way to get a job...
*bonus rant*
my door to my warehouse is next to a store. that store has a long window before it reached my door, and both our doors and the window have an awning above them. I get about 2-3 people a day who sit/stand/lean on my door, causing me to open it and ask them to move as I am holding very heavy very expensive things. THERE IS A HUGE WINDOW and a wall just 5 ft away, that is covered... why the hell would you stand infront of a door when it rains or when it's a bit sunny out! it's a door!!! you don't stand in doors!
I once had a guy open my door, come in, and sit on my steps (inside!!!) and light up a smoke (which I am allergic to). I thought someone accidently opened it and moved on, until I smelled it and had to yell at the asshole. "HEY! the door says private! get the F out!" (bad day).... ugh... people.
there probably won't be anymore shipping tales. not enough customer interaction...
..... oh wait
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