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I'M NOT DEAD. Yeah, we're down to four total 'Guards and a sub-guard right now, so I've been having to work extra shifts and it pretty much results in a tired Sunny. BUT, I'm awake enough tonight to give you some stories! Well, these arn't so much stories as just a collection of things I've discovered as a 'Guard.
---Types of Patrons---
There are two types of kids that swim: Kids that don't know how to swim, and kids that don't know how to swim but THINK they do. When it comes to underwater swimming, BOTH kinds feel they can breathe underwater, no matter how many times they fail.
There are kids that start paying attention when the Lifeguard walks down to the water's edge looking at them; and the kids that require you to blow a whistle five feet behind them before they'll look at you. Both kinds think you can't see them when their underwater, and neither actually listen till you yell at them for the fifth time, usually in a row.
Teenagers can usually be whipped into shape with the threat of A) BANISHMENT, or B) Calling Your Mom. Both are allowed, and often both will be used in the same instant.
Adults seem to think that since they're OLD, they're allowed to break the rules. There is litle we love more than being able to blow our whistle at the parents when they break the rules.
What we love more than that is THROWING THEM OUT.
---Don't Ask Me, I Just Work Here!---
So to the best of my knowledge, it's either very HARD or /ILLEGAL/ to find 'offical' 'Guard shirts outside of certified places. So imiange my surprise when some lady walks up from behind me, taps me on the shoulder, and asks if I'm the lifeguard. It gets worse when you realize that not only was I standing there twirlling my whistle about, but also that in order to tap me on the shoulder from behind; she had to ignore the big Red-Cross symbol with large letters reading '<COUNTY> YMCA LIFEGUARD' underneath....
Then again, it was better than the lady who asked if I would watch the kids in the pool while she went to the cardio room for about an hour. "...I..Yo-...Yeeessss ma'am, that's my job, ma'am."
---I Must Be Doing Something Right!---
So last Wed I had a pair of what can only be described as 'punk kids' come into the pool during the morning shift. It is, of course, a free country; so I overlooked the short mohawk. As there wasn't anyone else in the pool at the time, I played 'nice 'guard' and let them push the edges of what they were allowed to do (kinda-sorta a dive but I'll let it slide, etc) for awhile. What I did /not/ overlook was catching them lying about /biting a chunk/ out of one of the noodles we kept for kids to play with. I gave them a rather loud talking to and kicked them out for the day, mainly because I really don't like being lied to after I've given someone an inch.
Well the next day who do I see riding up on his bike then mister mohawk. I idly watch him toss his bike down near the bike rack, then perk up as he approches the window to the pool and presses his face against the glass. He slowly scans the pool, locks eyes with me for a good ten seconds...then backs away, gets on his bike, and rides off for the day.
Right, that's enough for now I think?
---Types of Patrons---
There are two types of kids that swim: Kids that don't know how to swim, and kids that don't know how to swim but THINK they do. When it comes to underwater swimming, BOTH kinds feel they can breathe underwater, no matter how many times they fail.
There are kids that start paying attention when the Lifeguard walks down to the water's edge looking at them; and the kids that require you to blow a whistle five feet behind them before they'll look at you. Both kinds think you can't see them when their underwater, and neither actually listen till you yell at them for the fifth time, usually in a row.
Teenagers can usually be whipped into shape with the threat of A) BANISHMENT, or B) Calling Your Mom. Both are allowed, and often both will be used in the same instant.
Adults seem to think that since they're OLD, they're allowed to break the rules. There is litle we love more than being able to blow our whistle at the parents when they break the rules.
What we love more than that is THROWING THEM OUT.
---Don't Ask Me, I Just Work Here!---
So to the best of my knowledge, it's either very HARD or /ILLEGAL/ to find 'offical' 'Guard shirts outside of certified places. So imiange my surprise when some lady walks up from behind me, taps me on the shoulder, and asks if I'm the lifeguard. It gets worse when you realize that not only was I standing there twirlling my whistle about, but also that in order to tap me on the shoulder from behind; she had to ignore the big Red-Cross symbol with large letters reading '<COUNTY> YMCA LIFEGUARD' underneath....
Then again, it was better than the lady who asked if I would watch the kids in the pool while she went to the cardio room for about an hour. "...I..Yo-...Yeeessss ma'am, that's my job, ma'am."
---I Must Be Doing Something Right!---
So last Wed I had a pair of what can only be described as 'punk kids' come into the pool during the morning shift. It is, of course, a free country; so I overlooked the short mohawk. As there wasn't anyone else in the pool at the time, I played 'nice 'guard' and let them push the edges of what they were allowed to do (kinda-sorta a dive but I'll let it slide, etc) for awhile. What I did /not/ overlook was catching them lying about /biting a chunk/ out of one of the noodles we kept for kids to play with. I gave them a rather loud talking to and kicked them out for the day, mainly because I really don't like being lied to after I've given someone an inch.
Well the next day who do I see riding up on his bike then mister mohawk. I idly watch him toss his bike down near the bike rack, then perk up as he approches the window to the pool and presses his face against the glass. He slowly scans the pool, locks eyes with me for a good ten seconds...then backs away, gets on his bike, and rides off for the day.
Right, that's enough for now I think?
.
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