No Language Barrier Here, Lady!

[Kurisu313]

Hi, there! This is my first thread, so go easy!

A little background. My girlfriend is from Hong Kong, and I am heavily into anime and manga, so over the past few years I have picked up more than a passing ability to speak a few foreign languages, namely Cantonese and Japanese. So I generally like having the chance to chat with asian people, for practice if nothing else.

This happened when I was working in a charity shop. The two ladies were speaking Mandarin to each other, which is close enough to Cantonese for me to pick up the gist.

They approach the counter, with lady 1 holding some clothes. I start taking the clothes and pricing them.

Me: Hi, did you find everything you were looking for?
Lady1: Yes, thank you. *Turns to her friend and speaks in Mandarin* Why do they bother talking? They should just take my stuff and respond to me.
Lady2: He works here, so he's probably not very educated. You can't blame him for having bad manners.
I was in university at the time. I have a BSc in Maths now. And that was bad manners, how? I'm fairly sure that cashiers in china have similar spiels.
Me: That'll be XX.XX, please.
Lady1: Ok *Gets money from purse, while still talking to her friend* Why do they dress so scruffy here? He looks like a tramp.
It's a volunteer charity shop. I was wearing a clean t-shirt and jeans. Hardly badly turned out.
Lady2:He probably makes less in a month than your husband does in a week. I mean, look at the quality of the clothes here.
Way to grasp the concept of volunteer work and charity shop, lady.
Me: *Hands bag with clothes to Lady1* Here you go.
Lady1: Thank you.
Me: *In almost-flawless Cantonese* No Problem, please come again.
lady1:
Lady2:

They were a pair of b*tches the whole time they were there, making comments about me, the decor, the merchandise...uggh...I enjoyed their expressions at the end, though

[Calud]

Haha, yeah I love doing that. Nice ownage there.

Done that several times. Sometimes in German when I was in France, sometimes in Polish when I was in German etc. Always a lot of fun.

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

I managed to do that to someone speaking French. I learned French living in Canada but hardly anyone speaks it down here.

Some guy came into where I worked and said something in French and I immediately responded to what he said. He demanded to know how I knew French because he didn't think anyone from down here did!

[tropicsgoddess]

Nice ownage!!!

[mariamousie1]

Good for you!

[chocoBug]

urgh what a pair of bitches! im suprised they didnt notice the total digust that must have been on your face and twig you could understand them! i get a lot of chinese tourists in my shop and they always speak cantonese..i always wondered if they were bitching about me . . . .

[Luna Baby]

Lady2:He probably makes less in a month than your husband does in a week. I mean, look at the quality of the clothes here.

I'm curious. If they felt the quality of what you were selling was so poor, why were they even shopping there?? Bitches.............

[jjllbb]

I'm curious. If they felt the quality of what you were selling was so poor, why were they even shopping there?? Bitches.............

I know right?

Jeez. Now you have me worried about all the people who come through my line speaking different languages...

[fireheart]

I'm curious. If they felt the quality of what you were selling was so poor, why were they even shopping there?? Bitches.............

Maybe they're all talk? As in shopping there so they can feel better about themselves, or look better than anyone else who DARES to come into the store. So yeah, pretty much douchewaffles.

[Mr Hero]

I'm hoping that one day Spanish speaking SC's do this around me. My second language is Spanish and I even graduated with a BA in Spanish Education.

[Slytovhand]

I'm looking to be in China if a couple of months (or less) and intend to pick up some Mandarin before I go... it would be real fun to do that to a few here and there

[Jester]

Nicely done, sir!


I speak a little Spanish (not much), but managed to own a dude once in that very language. I was doing magic at the restaurant I used to do magic at, and this one dude kept smarting off to me and making smartass comments, and then turning to the rest of the people at the table and saying this, that, or the other in Spanish to them, basically acting like a bigshot the whole time. I played along like a dumb gringo, until finally he irritated me, and in the middle of a trick, after he made another snide comment in Espanol, without breaking stride I turned to him and said, "Callete, pendejo!" (For those non-Spanish speaking folks that is basically, "Shut up, asshole!"

His face:
Everyone else's face:

And I continued on with the act with no further interruption.


That, however, was not nearly as classic as your ownage (you rock), which was on the same level as the ownage this girl I used to work with once got. This was in Phoenix, where we have a very large Hispanic population. My coworker was not Hispanic, though, and was a stereotypical gringa, i.e., a very fair-skinned white girl. However, this gringa happened to speak perfectly fluent Spanish. So one day, she is riding the bus, and there are these two Mexican dudes who were talking, and they started talking about her in ways guys will often talk to each other about attractive women. And they were getting rude, crude, and lewd. And they were not doing it very quietly....she could hear every word they were saying. And for a while she just sat there, acting like she had no idea what they were talking about. Then, finally, she turned to them, and in perfect Spanish, completely dressed them down, leaving them with jaws on the bus's floor! Classic.

[wagegoth]

If only there were celestial cameras that popped out and automatically took pictures of EWs who were owned, allowing us to keep those beautiful memories forever.

[Ironclad Alibi]

The office my wife and I worked in for many years had a number of Asian contractors. (The only real problem with them was their use of the office microwave to heat fish and kim-chee.) Several times they would be chatting away on the elevator as we traveled floor to floor. When we exited the elvator they would sometimes hold the door for us, whereupon we thanked them in Chinese. They were always shocked.

Another time we were having a dim sum brunch in a local Chinese restaurant. On of the servers almost dropper her tray when my wife thanked her in Chinese.

But the best language story I have is of a friend who was visiting Quebec. He went into a store and asked the clerk a question in English. The clerk indicated he did not speak English. My friend rephrased his question in Hungarian. The clerk suddenly spoke English.

[Eireann]

I heard a story about a friend of my sister's, who worked at a McDonald's in Texas. She was perfectly fluent in Spanish, having studied it for years.

One night, several Mexican guys came in and ordered food; while they were waiting for their order, they began talking about her, getting rather lewd. The lewdness quickly escalated.

Then one of them said, "Hey... maybe she understands us."

"No, she doesn't," said another.

The woman replied, "Oh, but I do."

They left without taking their food!