Blueberry Muffin Woes

[Writer Cath]

At my Tim's we had four kinds of blueberry muffin - regular, low fat, bran and cranberry-bluberry bran - all quite delicious.

Now when the muffins are finished baking, you have to wait until they're cool to take them off the rack, otherwise they basically just crumble and fall apart and it's not fun for anybody.

Unfortunately, I was on my break when this happened, but I was able to catch the gist of it due to my coworkers and the supervisor wandering in and out of the kitchen.

Apparently a woman, who I'm told, could have stood to miss out on a few muffins - wanted a blueberry muffin. At this particular moment however, they'd come out of the oven a few minutes ago and were thus unavailable. The girl managing the register told her this. She could come back in ten minutes when they'd be off the rack. Of course, I wouldn't be posting on the website if that had been the end of it. Naturally, she wanted a supervisor.

The supervisor came out and explained the situation.

The baker came out and explained the situation.

Somehow this failed to sink in.

So, my beleaguered coworkers decided on a different tactic.

Does she want a low fat blueberry muffin? No!

Does she want a blueberry bran muffin? Perish the thought.

Does she want a cranberry-blueberry bran muffin? Might as well have counted to five while holding the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

In the time she stood there complaining, the muffins cooled off enough for the baker to surgically remove one without making a huge mess and all was right with the cosmos once again. Huzzah. Oh, oh to live in a world where not getting my specific brand of blueberry muffin is enough to not only raise a stink about for fifteen minutes, but also enough to ruin my day. Just wow.

[friendofjimmyk]

Well, that's one way for her to get her muffin...rant until the cool off from all the air blowing out of her mouth!

[Brighid45]

See, this is where you can exercise your creativity and tell this eedjit that you've got lowly peons in the back baking a muffin just . . . for . . . her, with specially picked blueberries flown in from East Bumf*ck Barrens, butter churned that morning from contented cows, etc etc blah blah ad infinitum. You just know she would believe it and walk out of the store with her nose in the air past all the ORDINARY customers. "MY blueberries came from the Barrens!"

[Department stores *sigh*]

shoulda brought out the tray, let her choose a muffin, and then let her watch in horor as it falls apart infront of her eyes as you grab it for her. then when she demands a new one you charge her for two....

that may be my evil side talking again. im not sure anymore

[Bliss]

Oh my god brighid, what the hell is that poor thing in your avatar doing unwrapped and uncuddled????

[Becks]

shoulda brought out the tray, let her choose a muffin, and then let her watch in horor as it falls apart infront of her eyes as you grab it for her. then when she demands a new one you charge her for two....

I was thinking along those same lines, myself.

[AFpheonix]

This is why I rarely if ever give an SC a full explanation of anything. A simple, "I"m sorry, we're still baking that particular muffin" suffices enough to make her think that it's still in muffin batter mode. She may not like it, but she can't try to find any loop holes, either.

[Gawdzillers]

I would have gone for a cranberry-blueberry bran muffin. Because you get cranberries.

Nice Monty Python reference, by the way.

[CanadaGirl]

"Ma'am, if you sit down and read todays paper sitting over there I can guarantee our muffins will be ready before you finish reading the first page."

:P

[Jester]

I would have gone for a cranberry-blueberry bran muffin. Because you get cranberries.

Thanksgiving night, at the beginning of my pub crawl, I had a cranberry mojito. It was quite lovely. Maybe not one I would order on a regular basis, but hey, it was still good and in keeping with the spirit of the holiday.

[Writer Cath]

Nice Monty Python reference, by the way.

Thank you, I try.

And the cranberry-blueberry are really quite delicious. The regular blueberry have a really heavy taste to them that does not appeal.

[Zombi]

Does she want a cranberry-blueberry bran muffin? Might as well have counted to five while holding the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

"One...two...five!"
"Three, sir!"
"THREE!"

I love that movie.

I also love blueberry muffins. They are among the few things that I will kill for, not to mention one of the few edible things at the cafe at uni.

[Librarybabe]

Y'know, even when baking your own...

...my faithful 1974 ed. of the Betty Crocker cookbook says to let them "cool in pan for 5 minutes before removing". Sheesh.

[AFpheonix]

I suppose they all beat the spam spam spam spam spam egg sausage and spam muffin

[Argabarga]

shoulda brought out the tray, let her choose a muffin, and then let her watch in horor as it falls apart infront of her eyes as you grab it for her. then when she demands a new one you charge her for two....

that may be my evil side talking again. im not sure anymore

Unfortunately, all that would do is cause her to go off on a tirade about the low quality of your baked goods, the ineptness of the staff and the shoddy workmanship as who in this world would dare try and sell muffins of such low standing that they'd fall apart for no good reason? THen she'd demand compensation for the poor quality in the form of a refund for every blueberry muffin she's ever eaten in her life....

The only solution for these folks is the woodchipper.