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All the background needed is that I work in an indoor pool as a lifeguard and a swim instructor. This is at a gym. And now, to more reasons I'm glad this is only a summer job:
'ROID RAGE MAN
I had just finished cleaning and locking down the pool area for the night. All of the lights in the weight area (which the pool opens directly into) were off, including the hall lights. And yet, as I was leaving, I saw a man enter. At least, I think it was a man. From a distance, I thought he was wearing make-up: up close, I realized that no, his eyelids were somehow naturally blue, and the reason his cheeks were red was because he was PISSED. He glared at me the entire time I was walking to the front desk.
When I got there, the man who runs the tanning beds was arguing with the new girl we have on counter. Apparently, roid-rage man had grabbed the keys form her and run into the back, even though she was in the process of locking the door. Now, none of us are large, and roid-rage man is approximately the size of a hippo made of tire-irons. Tanning guy, lovely man that he is, said he had to make a few last people leave the men's locker room and disappeared, leaving us to tell roid-rage man that he had to leave. Seeing as I'm about half of new counter girl's size, I just followed and watched.
NCG= New counter girl
RRM= ROID RAGE MAN
TG= Tanning guy.
(Anything in parenthesis)= my thoughts
NCG: Sir, you have to leave. It is closing time and the doors are supposed to be locked already.
RRM: *glares and keeps lifting weights* THERE'S STILL FIVE MINUTES UNTIL TEN
NCG: Yes, but ten is when we leave. The gym closes at 9:45. You need to leave.
RRM: I KNOW B. YOU KNOW, THE OWNER? I KNOW HIM. I HAVE FIVE MINUTES. (My god, he sounds like the guy that voiced Powerthirst.)
NCG does not take being yelled at well. She's nearly in tears. Heck, I was scared of this guy, and I was just standing in the doorway. At this point, tanning guy grew some nads and came to help. RRM actually relaxed a bit (read: the veins on his forehead shrank slightly) at the sight of an authority figure that lacked ovaries.
TG: Sir, it is now two minutes to ten. If you do not leave immediately, I will call the cops.
RRM dropped the weight on the floor and left. It took TG and NCG together to haul it back up to where it was supposed to be (hey, just because we HAVE a free membership doesn't mean we USE it).
I left soon enough to watch RRM ride his motorcycle between to parked cars, nearly hit a third that was behind them, fall over, and then ride dramatically into the sunset. He tried the same stuff the next day, and was met with a much larger, male manager waving a "We hold the right to refuse service to anyone" sign in his face
Aim for the throat, kiddos!
A new little girl was in my class. Even if they don't want to float on their back, we're supposed to roll them over and try to convince them to relax while we hold onto them for just five seconds (at first). I told her what I was going to do and slowly started to roll her over, near the wall so she felt safer. She seemed fine for a moment, then decided that she did not like this course of action and punched me in the throat as hard as she could. I am adding that to my list of places I never, EVER want to be hit again.
What did her mother do, through all of this? Why, laugh and take pictures, of course!
Those are mine, thank you.
We have a back pump room where we could store our bags while in the water, but we almost never do that because there is usually a layer of water on the ground in there. I stow my bag under the bleachers, instead.
This particular day, I turned to see a little child (for some reason not in lessons while her sister was) running around, dragging my pants along with her. Now, I am running low on pants as it is, and this girl was dipping them in the hot tub and spilling some unknown liquid from her cup all over them. Again, her mother did not seem to care that her child was running with someone else's pants.
I had to leave without any pants on, with just a towel around my waist because I refused to wear them (it is not fun to put soaking wet jeans on). People stared.
The return of Lurch
This one isn't so much of a suck as it is annoying. A little four-year-old girl I have dubbed "Lurch" as returned to my class. Why the odd nickname? She has the usual, high-pitched kid voice, but the moment I ask if she wants to do anything she says "no". She doesn't just say it, she intones it in a spectacular imitation of the butler from the Adams Family.
'ROID RAGE MAN
I had just finished cleaning and locking down the pool area for the night. All of the lights in the weight area (which the pool opens directly into) were off, including the hall lights. And yet, as I was leaving, I saw a man enter. At least, I think it was a man. From a distance, I thought he was wearing make-up: up close, I realized that no, his eyelids were somehow naturally blue, and the reason his cheeks were red was because he was PISSED. He glared at me the entire time I was walking to the front desk.
When I got there, the man who runs the tanning beds was arguing with the new girl we have on counter. Apparently, roid-rage man had grabbed the keys form her and run into the back, even though she was in the process of locking the door. Now, none of us are large, and roid-rage man is approximately the size of a hippo made of tire-irons. Tanning guy, lovely man that he is, said he had to make a few last people leave the men's locker room and disappeared, leaving us to tell roid-rage man that he had to leave. Seeing as I'm about half of new counter girl's size, I just followed and watched.
NCG= New counter girl
RRM= ROID RAGE MAN
TG= Tanning guy.
(Anything in parenthesis)= my thoughts
NCG: Sir, you have to leave. It is closing time and the doors are supposed to be locked already.
RRM: *glares and keeps lifting weights* THERE'S STILL FIVE MINUTES UNTIL TEN
NCG: Yes, but ten is when we leave. The gym closes at 9:45. You need to leave.
RRM: I KNOW B. YOU KNOW, THE OWNER? I KNOW HIM. I HAVE FIVE MINUTES. (My god, he sounds like the guy that voiced Powerthirst.)
NCG does not take being yelled at well. She's nearly in tears. Heck, I was scared of this guy, and I was just standing in the doorway. At this point, tanning guy grew some nads and came to help. RRM actually relaxed a bit (read: the veins on his forehead shrank slightly) at the sight of an authority figure that lacked ovaries.
TG: Sir, it is now two minutes to ten. If you do not leave immediately, I will call the cops.
RRM dropped the weight on the floor and left. It took TG and NCG together to haul it back up to where it was supposed to be (hey, just because we HAVE a free membership doesn't mean we USE it).
I left soon enough to watch RRM ride his motorcycle between to parked cars, nearly hit a third that was behind them, fall over, and then ride dramatically into the sunset. He tried the same stuff the next day, and was met with a much larger, male manager waving a "We hold the right to refuse service to anyone" sign in his face
Aim for the throat, kiddos!
A new little girl was in my class. Even if they don't want to float on their back, we're supposed to roll them over and try to convince them to relax while we hold onto them for just five seconds (at first). I told her what I was going to do and slowly started to roll her over, near the wall so she felt safer. She seemed fine for a moment, then decided that she did not like this course of action and punched me in the throat as hard as she could. I am adding that to my list of places I never, EVER want to be hit again.
What did her mother do, through all of this? Why, laugh and take pictures, of course!
Those are mine, thank you.
We have a back pump room where we could store our bags while in the water, but we almost never do that because there is usually a layer of water on the ground in there. I stow my bag under the bleachers, instead.
This particular day, I turned to see a little child (for some reason not in lessons while her sister was) running around, dragging my pants along with her. Now, I am running low on pants as it is, and this girl was dipping them in the hot tub and spilling some unknown liquid from her cup all over them. Again, her mother did not seem to care that her child was running with someone else's pants.
I had to leave without any pants on, with just a towel around my waist because I refused to wear them (it is not fun to put soaking wet jeans on). People stared.
The return of Lurch
This one isn't so much of a suck as it is annoying. A little four-year-old girl I have dubbed "Lurch" as returned to my class. Why the odd nickname? She has the usual, high-pitched kid voice, but the moment I ask if she wants to do anything she says "no". She doesn't just say it, she intones it in a spectacular imitation of the butler from the Adams Family.
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