They call me tasty cakes

[allegrasparkle]

Thanks to my husband I now have a new nickname which I'm sure will haunt me. Today I was at work and I see the shoplifter du-jour has arrived. Skinny dark circled eyes carrying a large backback. BINGO!

Well she obliges me and shoplifts. I go out to apprehend her and she struggles. As I am trying the hand cuff her she bites me on the arm. Skin is broken blood is flowing. I get a trip to the hospital!!!!

After a course of antibiotics, hep shots, HIV test, and talkign with the police I get to call my spouse to update. He see that is me he answers the phone "Hey Tasty Cakes!" I am not pleased.

[ShadowTiger]

I'm sorry. I have to.

We have a bunch of known shoplifters in the store I work in as well. One of them is in a wheelchair, with a lot of cloth on his lap at all times. They announce his arrival over the store personal radios every staff has, and I get to work. I take my key-cutting shades, and a walking stick from our camping aisle, and a few empty boxes. I hear the warning "SC is in 20 looking at bolts" and I make my move.

I don the shades and walking stick and take the box into the nuts aisle with me. I am notoriously sneaky in terms of stealth, and have great sneaking sneakers. I sneak into the aisle, and start doing my "blind staff" routine. (Sneaky. I told you.) I go feeling around in the little bins of nuts and bolts for what I have to restock, all the while keeping an eye on Mr. Stealer who doesn't know I'm there half the time.

I've definitely seen him sneaking goods beneath the blankets before. Some car brake lightbulbs, (He drives?!!) some nuts and bolts, some rope, ... even a basketball from our pool area once!! Wow! So when he leaves the aisle, I whisper to the cashiers over the radio what he's stolen and how much it costs, and it appears on his bill when he checks out. He's never bothered to ask about the charges. When he doesn't buy anything, he's stopped by a staff member before he can leave the building, asking him if he needs to find anything. The guy has instructions to take the towels off of his lap and tell him that they'll have to go find a bar code for the towel since it doesn't have one. It obviously reveals the contents of his thefts, since he has nowhere else to store them on his person on the wheelchair. Then he knows he has to pay for things. He's usually in a few minutes later returning them anyway.

[crashhelmet]

My dad was a Marine Corps Drill instructor, so naturally (like the Bill Cosby joke) I thought my name was "Maggot" growing up

Anyway, I'm working behind the bar one day and he comes in to play in a blackjack tournament. All of a sudden I hear him shouting across the bar "Hey maggot! Pour me a cup of coffee when you get the chance!"

Of course, the other customers I had at the bar hear this and proceed to call me maggot for the next few weeks.

CH

[Food Lady]

hee!

[Caffienated_Caramel]

..... I love ur name Tasty cakes *ducks* don't hurt me.

So what happened to bitey bitekins?

[Hyena Dandy]

I'm gonna have to call my boyfriend tat one day.

[smileyeagle1021]

I'm gonna have to call my boyfriend tat one day.

I already have (called my boyfriend that)

[LillFilly]

Wah! Profiling! I have dark circled eyes and I'm NOT a shoplifter!

Just kidding. I do have really bad circles under my eyes; can't seem to cover them, but it's because I'm so pale and have that nice blue irish hue to my skin.

Gah, just thinking about how dirty her mouth could have been makes me want to take a shower!

And that's the cutest hamster tongue ever! Mine will start to lick, but that means he's getting a taste before he chomps down!

[allegrasparkle]

The nibbler? she is a guest of the county at ye old greybar hotel. PS LOOOVE the LOL hamster

[mandaliz8704]

Oh yeah? Well they call me Tater salad.

[Hermione]

I'm sorry. I have to.

I love that one!

[tropicsgoddess]

SO's nickname from me is Teddy Bear. I like Tasty Cakes.....(especially his)...

[Sheldonrs]

Oh yeah? Well they call me Tater salad.

They call ME tossed salad.

[smileyeagle1021]

They call ME tossed salad.

thank God I didn't read that at work... otherwise I"d have to be explaining to guests why I couldn't breath.

[Irving Patrick Freleigh]

They call ME tossed salad.

Y'know, I guess I had that one coming.