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"Don't Tell Me What Ter Do, Cracka!"

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  • "Don't Tell Me What Ter Do, Cracka!"

    Long, sluggish weekend...not as sucky as Homecoming (which I missed out on due to MTELs, phew!), but pretty darn close.


    At Least They're Reading Signs....

    There's a green sign on top of my deli that lists some weekly special sandwiches that get made during the week at lunchtime. We never make them on weekends. Heck, I'm not even allowed to touch the panini press that's on the counter on weekends.

    Nonetheless I had a grand total of 12 ask me to make them a sandwich on the green sign, and got all huffy when I told them I couldn't because I lacked both the ingredients and other supplies to make said specials.

    One of them, who asked me on Friday to make an Asian chicken wrap and was told the above response, said "Friday IS a weekday."

    Ah. You can tell the days of the week. Good. But apparently you can't tell time, as it is now 5:45 PM, way past lunch, when specials are made.


    Lack of Planning on Your Part...

    I had two students come up to the counter, and each asked how late my station would be open. I explained that since the cafeteria closed at 6:30, by 6:35 all my supplies would be pulled and wrapped up, meaning I was closed. Both wanted sandwiches to go, but wasn't sure when to get them. I offered to make them, wrap them up, and store them in the cooler until they were leaving. Guy A did just that, and I happily made him an Italian sub and wrapped it in saran wrap before stashing it in the fridge (I am allowed to do this). The girl behind him declined my offer and said she'd just wait.

    Fast forward to 6:50. The gate's been down for 20 minutes now, and both come back to my (now clean and closed) station. Guy A asks if I still have his sandwich for him, and I pull it out of the fridge and hand it to him. Girl behind him rattles off a sandwich order so fast I barely catch it all. The two other workers in the station helping me clean start laughing at her. When she doesn't get the drift, I explain to her that there's nothing left, I'm closed, tough luck. She gets huffy and demands to know why I took care of the other guy and not her.

    "Because he ordered a sandwich ahead of time, and you didn't, even though I offered to do so," I say.

    "Well, NOW what should I do?" she demands.

    "Go...wait for the commuter caf to open at 8?"

    "I can't wait that long!!" she whines.

    Boss S smiles at me, and goes "Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on our part."

    "Huh?"

    Boss S: "BYE!!!"

    She stomps off, leaving us to laugh at her.


    Wherein I'm Called a "Cracka"

    I'm trying to dole out sandwiches to a gaggle of teenyboppers girls who seem more than content to twitter amongst themselves rather than, you know, telling me what they want.

    Suddenly a black pair of tongs come in front of my face as I'm trying to peel a couple of slices of Swiss cheese off of their stack. A female black student stole the tongs we use in the potato chip basket to help herself to the supplies in my bins. A huge health no-no.

    I take a hold of the tongs and go "Excuse me, please don't do that. Tell me what you want and I'll get it."

    "Don't you tell me what ter do, cracka!," she barks, before stomping off without her precious cheese.

    I ended up getting a new pair of tongs for the chips, because no way was I going to put a cheesy one back in the basket and risk having a student who's dairy allergy is so sensitive that they'd react to cheese on the chips. Just think of all the liability...yikes.

    And the "cracka" thing was ten times as funny because I don't even look white, I'm mostly Italian and Hispanic. I look more Latino (or Latina, I guess) than white.


    ick ick ick ick DON'T DO THAT!!

    Another big pet peeve of mine working deli is while I'm serving another student someone will come by and rather than asking me for tomatoes for a burger, or a couple of pickle spears, they reach in with their BARE HANDS and help themselves, WHILE I'M RIGHT THERE.

    Seriously, just ask me and I'll dish it out. God only knows where your hands have been.

    ....never mind. I don't think I want to know.


    New Vocabulary

    So I guess I don't know everything about the deli yet, as some students pointed out recently:

    Roll=wrap/tortilla
    Lettuce=ham
    My girlfriend's butt=white bulkie roll
    Asian cheese=cheddar
    stuff=well, everything on there. Never specific. Just, "wheat with some stuff".
    chopped birdy=chicken salad

    I'm still trying to figure out the "lettuce" means ham thing.


    Uh Huh...

    Chick: *holding up a pear* This is one funny looking apple. It's pointy.


    Right.....apparently so were the sticks you played with as a kid. Did they go in one ear and out the other?


    The Banana Stickers Are Back

    Some of you may remember from threads past about our bananas toting stickers saying some rather...umm...interesting things. While restocking fruits tonight I spotted these gems:
    "Let's Play!"
    "Pocket-Sized Fun"
    "A-Peeling Fruit"
    "LOL"

    I've got a pic of the lolnana somewhere.


    mmmkay. Done.

  • #2
    at work we get those Dole bananas all the time! We started to put them on our nametags! I love those stickers!!
    Now, if you smell the roses but it doesn't lift your spirits, you're either allergic to rose pollen or you need medical intervention. ~ Seshat

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    • #3
      Chick: *holding up a pear* This is one funny looking apple. It's pointy.
      That ^^ had me all WTF then laughing...!

      Stupid, stupid, stupid....
      Teach a SC to fish... and they will whine about you not catching, filleting, frying, and serving it up on a silver platter for them. - EvilEmpryss

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      • #4
        This is a college or university right? Please don't tell me a 'I graduated high school' student didn't know what a pear was. Please? Please?
        "If anyone wants this old box containing the broken bits of my former faith in humanity, I'll take your best offer now. You may be able to salvage a few of em' for parts..... " - Quote by Argabarga

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        • #5
          I've had 'I graduated fom high-school' co-workers say 'Gosh, I've never seen red celery before!' (it was rhubarb). Put that in your salad and you'll get a hell of a surprise.
          This is why one of the managers at this particular job made all the newbies take a test on identifying fruit and vegetables before she let us loose on the registers.
          God made me a cannibal to fix problems like you. - Angelspit, '100%'

          I'm sorry, I'm not authorised to give a f**k.

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          • #6
            If you're an Italian-Hispanic mix, that's textbook white.

            Which is to say, you're a cracka.

            Just like me.

            Comment


            • #7
              These idiots are reaching over the sneeze shield plexi wall thingy to grab stuff? WTF?
              Don't wanna; not gonna.

              Comment


              • #8
                Quoth 42_42_42 View Post
                These idiots are reaching over the sneeze shield plexi wall thingy to grab stuff? WTF?
                That's why you keep a pair of metal tongs with you, to whack them over the knuckles if they try to do that.
                I am the nocturnal echo-locating flying mammal man.

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                • #9
                  Quoth Nashida View Post
                  Seriously, just ask me and I'll dish it out. God only knows where your hands have been.

                  ....never mind. I don't think I want to know.
                  In my pants







                  pocket. That's where I keep my wallet, ya know.
                  Ba'al: I'm a god. Gods are all-knowing.

                  http://unrelatedcaptions.com/45147

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                  • #10


                    Broom, you've reminded me exactly why Rule #1 was put in place.

                    Oh well, comp needed a bath anyway.


                    Quoth LillFilly View Post
                    This is a college or university right? Please don't tell me a 'I graduated high school' student didn't know what a pear was. Please? Please?
                    Will you love me any less if I say it is a college? Even less so if I told you she's a junior?

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                    • #11
                      I don't think I want to get a banana with a sticker that says "Let's play!" I'd spend too much time laughing and never eat it!

                      Also, people are just disgusting
                      Look, a signature!

                      If every cashier in the world went on strike, retail would come to a screeching halt, even if for a couple hours.

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