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I just got off a call with a customer who had put in a complaint several days ago about a poor meal. She claims she was told that she would be mailed out vouchers to compensate her for the issue.
The first problem here is that we don't send actually out vouchers. Decisions like that are left up to the local management of each restaurant in our chain. Secondly, I know there's no way in heaven she was ever told we'd be be mailing her out any vouchers. The agent she spoke with is way too competent to tell a tall tale like that, no matter how badly she wanted to get rid of a guest on her line.
So a week later she calls back angry that nothing has come in the mail. Here's how the conversation went as best I can remember it.
Me: Thank you for calling **** how can I help you.
SC: Nuthing, I've got a problem. I called in several days ago and was promised by your coworker **** that I would be mailed some gift vouchers for a problem I had at your restaurant.
Me: (alarm bells already going off that she's a liar because of my afore mentioned explanation) OK, well let's just take a look shall we. Your name?
SC: Ms. I'll die alone and unloved
Me: Okay. Yes I see the complaint here and show that it was passed through to the store's management to be addressed.
SC: No, that's not what I was told. I was promised a voucher would be mailed and I expect that it will be.
Me: Well I'm afraid that's not the way we work here. If *** told you we'd be mailing some out, I'm sorry but she told you wrongly and we'll have to listen to the call to verify that she's telling guests the right things.
SC: Well I don't care, I'm the customer and I was given a bad meal and I expect you to make it right if I'm to ever go back there.
Me: Well all I can do here is pass this along to management and see what they'll do for you.
SC: You're not listening to me! I want this taken care of right now! You have on your menu the words "satisfaction guaranteed". Now this is a legally binding contract do you understand?! When you write this on here, it's a legal contract that I get exactly what I want as the consumer. Are you hearing what I'm saying?!
Me: (thinking: okay, now the gloves come off) Ma'am are you a lawyer?
SC: *sputter* *pause* Yes I am.
Me: Okay then well as a lawyer you'd know that a contract IS a legally binding agreement, but a menu is not. Even considering it was, according to the store notes about the incident you DID finish the meal! So even if we say satisfaction guaranteed on the menu, we can't do anything for your satisfaction if you don't even let us know when you're not satisfied. And if the food was really so bad, why didn't you say something then so they could replace it?
SC: It doesn't matter that I didn't say anything, I was the customer and I wasn't satisfied as per your legally binding contract (on a freakin menu)
Me: Well where's your proof to show that it was bad? If you want to talk legally, then Legally we really don't have to send you anything if you don't have proof to back up what you're saying. And you ate all the evidence didn't you?! The vouchers we send are sent in good faith that we believe you're telling the truth about a problem, because we know f*ck-ups (not the word I used) can and will happen. We'll try our best to make up for them within reason, but there's no law saying we have to do even this bare minimum for you without proof to back up what you're saying.
SC: Do you hear what you're telling?! (she's obviously not fond or used to people standing up to her) I'm the customer and you're telling me I might be lying to you!
Me: Well I'm going to go listen to that call you took with *** and see what she actually told you about the vouchers. That will tell me all I need to know about the veracity of what you're saying to me now. (I was just imagining how scared she was knowing she'd been caught in her lie, cause I know my coworker would never have promised her anything like what she was saying)
At this point her speech degraded into something I won't repeat on this post. Thankfully she asked for a manager and I could pass her off without listening to anymore of her lies. Of course, I made sure to pass her off to one with backbone would just tell her the same thing I had, so nothing would ever come of her complaint on our end.
Sadly we ended up having to send through a revised complaint for her to management, but I added a few details of our chat to the report to ensure that they would regard her in as much the same way I did.
The first problem here is that we don't send actually out vouchers. Decisions like that are left up to the local management of each restaurant in our chain. Secondly, I know there's no way in heaven she was ever told we'd be be mailing her out any vouchers. The agent she spoke with is way too competent to tell a tall tale like that, no matter how badly she wanted to get rid of a guest on her line.
So a week later she calls back angry that nothing has come in the mail. Here's how the conversation went as best I can remember it.
Me: Thank you for calling **** how can I help you.
SC: Nuthing, I've got a problem. I called in several days ago and was promised by your coworker **** that I would be mailed some gift vouchers for a problem I had at your restaurant.
Me: (alarm bells already going off that she's a liar because of my afore mentioned explanation) OK, well let's just take a look shall we. Your name?
SC: Ms. I'll die alone and unloved
Me: Okay. Yes I see the complaint here and show that it was passed through to the store's management to be addressed.
SC: No, that's not what I was told. I was promised a voucher would be mailed and I expect that it will be.
Me: Well I'm afraid that's not the way we work here. If *** told you we'd be mailing some out, I'm sorry but she told you wrongly and we'll have to listen to the call to verify that she's telling guests the right things.
SC: Well I don't care, I'm the customer and I was given a bad meal and I expect you to make it right if I'm to ever go back there.
Me: Well all I can do here is pass this along to management and see what they'll do for you.
SC: You're not listening to me! I want this taken care of right now! You have on your menu the words "satisfaction guaranteed". Now this is a legally binding contract do you understand?! When you write this on here, it's a legal contract that I get exactly what I want as the consumer. Are you hearing what I'm saying?!
Me: (thinking: okay, now the gloves come off) Ma'am are you a lawyer?
SC: *sputter* *pause* Yes I am.
Me: Okay then well as a lawyer you'd know that a contract IS a legally binding agreement, but a menu is not. Even considering it was, according to the store notes about the incident you DID finish the meal! So even if we say satisfaction guaranteed on the menu, we can't do anything for your satisfaction if you don't even let us know when you're not satisfied. And if the food was really so bad, why didn't you say something then so they could replace it?
SC: It doesn't matter that I didn't say anything, I was the customer and I wasn't satisfied as per your legally binding contract (on a freakin menu)
Me: Well where's your proof to show that it was bad? If you want to talk legally, then Legally we really don't have to send you anything if you don't have proof to back up what you're saying. And you ate all the evidence didn't you?! The vouchers we send are sent in good faith that we believe you're telling the truth about a problem, because we know f*ck-ups (not the word I used) can and will happen. We'll try our best to make up for them within reason, but there's no law saying we have to do even this bare minimum for you without proof to back up what you're saying.
SC: Do you hear what you're telling?! (she's obviously not fond or used to people standing up to her) I'm the customer and you're telling me I might be lying to you!
Me: Well I'm going to go listen to that call you took with *** and see what she actually told you about the vouchers. That will tell me all I need to know about the veracity of what you're saying to me now. (I was just imagining how scared she was knowing she'd been caught in her lie, cause I know my coworker would never have promised her anything like what she was saying)
At this point her speech degraded into something I won't repeat on this post. Thankfully she asked for a manager and I could pass her off without listening to anymore of her lies. Of course, I made sure to pass her off to one with backbone would just tell her the same thing I had, so nothing would ever come of her complaint on our end.
Sadly we ended up having to send through a revised complaint for her to management, but I added a few details of our chat to the report to ensure that they would regard her in as much the same way I did.
I would love to hear how badly the Armchair Lawyer SC got owned my your manager.
un-dun doobie-doobie doo-wah::
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