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Short-Term Memory Loss Man and the Ballsy Panhandlers

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  • Short-Term Memory Loss Man and the Ballsy Panhandlers

    This thread reminded me of this story

    On Friday nights I close the bookstore by myself. I always close the door and put the "CLOSED" sign up at 10:30 PM and don't let anyone else in, but I don't lock the door so that the people remaining in the store can still leave. That's the way it's been for the past four years, except for maybe about 3 Fridays when I was sick/out of town

    A few weeks ago, a guy I never saw before tried to come in through the closed doors at 10:35 or so, just as I was finishing up with the last customer. I'll call him SC but it doesn't describe him because he never actually bought anything!

    Me: Sorry, we're closed now.
    SC: *looks really surprised* But I thought you closed at 11:30!
    Me: No, sorry, it's 10:30.
    SC: But you always close at 11:30 on Fridays.
    Me: ...er. No, sorry. It's 10:30.
    SC: But you used to close at 11!
    Me: (So now it's 11?) ...Nope. Sorry.

    The customer I am helping kind of scurries away when confronted with the SC's embarassing ignorance. SC guy stands there looking all sad and pathetic. Then he leaves and I lock the door.

    Next Friday! A little after 10:30, I had already closed the door and turned the sign off to wait for the last customers to finish up. The same SC from last week comes in through the CLOSED door (with a big sign on in that says "Closed" mind you).

    Me: Sorry, we're closed now.
    SC: No you close at 11:30.
    Me: Sorry, it's 10:30 on Fridays.
    SC: Didn't you used to close at 11:30?
    Me: No, we always close at 10:30 on Fridays.
    SC: Are you sure?
    Me: (exasperated) I'm pretty sure.

    Once again SC guy stands there for a few moments looking forlorn, like I personally changed our store hours just so he couldn't come in any more or something. Then he leaves.

    NEXT Friday! This time, it's 10:24 (I looked at the clock). The same SC walks in looking extremely excited. He says, "I made it this time didn't I!" as he walks by me into the store. This makes me unhappy because we are 6 minutes from closing. Sure enough, 6 minutes later, SC is buried in a book somewhere in the back room. I walk around and politely tell everyone that we're closing. Most people realize that means, "We're closed so GTFO" so they leave. SC, of course, does not even attempt to stand up. Five minutes later, the other customers have left and he is still sitting reading a book. I go up and say, "Sorry, we're going to have to close up." SC kind of nods and continues reading his book.

    So I do the really nice thing which is to count out my drawer and start it over for the next day, which takes about ten minutes. If SC buys anything (yeah right!) then I can add it on to the next day's totals. When I finish that, I go to look for him. He's moved from where he was to an even more obscure space further in the back of the store, I guess hoping that I can't find him? This time I'm not polite anymore. I say, "Sir, we're closed now. You have to leave." He gets all mopey on me and says, "Okay." He stands up and dumps the book he was reading on the ground, nice. I turn around and go back up to the front desk to wait. When I get there, I am surprised to find that he has NOT started to leave but is instead looking at ANOTHER book!! Really exasperating. So I go back to him and just stare at him for a moment until he puts the book down. I literally follow him to the door to make sure that he is actually leaving (by now it's almost 10:50). As we approach the door, SC darts to the side towards another bookshelf in order to look at some more books :facepalm: He does NOT want to leave! I say loudly, "Sir!" and he ignores me for a moment before grudgingly leaving the store, where I can thankfully lock the door behind him.

    This was 2 weeks ago today, and I haven't seen him since. Hopefully he will never come back? We'll find out....


    Bonus SC story! Yay?

    Lately there has been more and more people trying to bum change from customers IN THE STORE. They come in looking all normal and stuff, and then I slowly realize that they are going around to the customers in the store, holding cups with signs on them for some bogus charity. The reason I don't notice is because they don't actually say anything, they just walk around showing their cups to people. Why would you ever be allowed to panhandle in a store? Then I have to kick them out and I don't enjoy doing that. It really annoys me because my boss would be PISSED if he saw them doing that and of course I would get blamed for letting them in
    Last edited by Mnemjian; 10-17-2009, 02:10 PM.
    !
    "For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction." -- Lord Byron

  • #2
    The second time he refused to move, I'd call the police and have him taken out on trespassing charges. I might even warn him first, but the fact that you close at 10:30 should be more than enough warning.
    The Case of the Missing Mandrake; A Jude Derry, Sorceress Sleuth Mystery Available on Amazon.

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    • #3
      I've seen those panhandlers before. As soon as I do, I make a beeline for the nearest person wearing a store badge and report them. These guys aren't just panhandlers, their scammers only pretending to collect for legitmate charities. Cops are usually very interested to know about them.
      Sorry, my cow died so I don't need your bull

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      • #4
        You're a lot nicer than I would have been to the guy.

        "Dude, what part of we're closed and get out of here do you not understand?"

        If he keeps doing what he's doing, I'd have snuck over to a phone to call police for tresspassing.

        Ignore him and hope he's dumb enough to stick around until the cops come by.
        Fixing problems... one broken customer at a time.

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        • #5
          That guy is clearly an addict and you are cutting him off from his supply ... of words.
          "I can tell her you're all tied up in the projection room." Sunset Boulevard.

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          • #6
            I'd like to think a real book addict isn't that inconsiderate of employees...
            "I am quite confident that I do exist."
            "Excuse me, I'm making perfect sense. You're just not keeping up." The Doctor

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            • #7
              Bah. He's no book addict. Book addicts know how to READ... And he clearly is unable to read the sign on the door that says CLOSED!
              "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
              "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
              "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
              "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
              "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
              "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
              Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
              "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

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              • #8
                Quoth EricKei View Post
                Bah. He's no book addict. Book addicts know how to READ... And he clearly is unable to read the sign on the door that says CLOSED!
                He WAS holding that book upside down...

                He never came back this week so yay! He was pretty non-threatening, overall, and I do have my pepper spray just in case
                !
                "For truth is always strange; stranger than fiction." -- Lord Byron

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