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We're discontinuing products just to spite you.
Short and sweet:
= Happy, friendly me doing my best to get you your cheap, overpriced lotions every day.
= Customer.
Do you have Fuchsia Dark Overlord Vanilla lotion?
Well, I've haven't seen it in store. How long ago did you buy it?
Three years ago!
Oh, we probably don't carry it anymore then. You can always check online!
You guys ALWAYS discontinue products when I find one I like!!
Yes, we're all out to get you. We sit in the back, with all our extra infinite stock that we just don't want to put on the shelves, and wait for you to come into the store. Fifteen minutes before you get there our Evil Empire sends a mass telepathic message to all employees in any store in a 30 mile radius of YOU. We rip it all off the shelves. All the lotion, all the shower gel, in any scent you've ever purchased, or even thought about purchasing, so that once you get here I (or one of my lucky coworkers) can experience the sheer glee that comes from telling you we don't carry the bottle of lotion that was so important, that was such fragrant deliciousness, you only bought it once three years ago.
I just remembered this situation, its infuriating since my work hasn't installed my Psychic Abilities Chip yet.
Me: What can I help you find?
C: Im looking for a gift for [relative]
Me: Okay! Do they already wear one of our scents?
C: I don't know.
Me: Okay, do they like floral, fruity, or a different kind of smell?
C: I don't know.
Me: Okay.. do you know what they normally wear? what they smell like?
C: I don't know.
Me: OKAY. Uh. Do they burn candles in their house, if so what smell?
C: I don't know!!!
Give me SOMETHING people.
Oh jeez, theres more!
I was doing line control, to keep people moving and happy. I am specifically instructed to NEVER leave my 2x2 area of floor tile. We have 2 lines of about 15 people each and this douche wants his customer service. He looks at me and waits. I get a feeling I'm being watched, I look around. There it is. The look. I raise my eyebrows in a passive agreement that we have, indeed, locked eyes and I am curious as to why he's staring at me like a hungry puma. A hungry lotion ingesting puma. He wants help. I inform him, while looking around for my (nonexistant) coworkers, that I cannot leave my position. My position is vital. Without me there, on my four tiles (2 of which i'm fairly certain are lava), the entire stores order breaks down. There will be chaos and crying. I cannot leave. He appeals to my desire to not get in trouble, tells me he'll never tell my boss I left!
But, the chaos will ensue if I leave. Surely, my boss with notice people fist fighting each other for the next available register? I try to convey this to him, with my deepest sorrow, that I cannot leave my position. He looks angry, he cannot find his words. Finally, a cashier steps out from behind the register and assists him while the entire line glares at him for pulling one of four cashiers off a till.
= Happy, friendly me doing my best to get you your cheap, overpriced lotions every day. = Customer. Do you have Fuchsia Dark Overlord Vanilla lotion? Well, I've haven't seen it in store. How long ago did you buy it? Three years ago! Oh, we probably don't carry it anymore then. You can always check online! You guys ALWAYS discontinue products when I find one I like!!Yes, we're all out to get you. We sit in the back, with all our extra infinite stock that we just don't want to put on the shelves, and wait for you to come into the store. Fifteen minutes before you get there our Evil Empire sends a mass telepathic message to all employees in any store in a 30 mile radius of YOU. We rip it all off the shelves. All the lotion, all the shower gel, in any scent you've ever purchased, or even thought about purchasing, so that once you get here I (or one of my lucky coworkers) can experience the sheer glee that comes from telling you we don't carry the bottle of lotion that was so important, that was such fragrant deliciousness, you only bought it once three years ago.
I just remembered this situation, its infuriating since my work hasn't installed my Psychic Abilities Chip yet.
Me: What can I help you find?
C: Im looking for a gift for [relative]
Me: Okay! Do they already wear one of our scents?
C: I don't know.
Me: Okay, do they like floral, fruity, or a different kind of smell?
C: I don't know.
Me: Okay.. do you know what they normally wear? what they smell like?
C: I don't know.
Me: OKAY. Uh. Do they burn candles in their house, if so what smell?
C: I don't know!!!
Give me SOMETHING people.
Oh jeez, theres more!
I was doing line control, to keep people moving and happy. I am specifically instructed to NEVER leave my 2x2 area of floor tile. We have 2 lines of about 15 people each and this douche wants his customer service. He looks at me and waits. I get a feeling I'm being watched, I look around. There it is. The look. I raise my eyebrows in a passive agreement that we have, indeed, locked eyes and I am curious as to why he's staring at me like a hungry puma. A hungry lotion ingesting puma. He wants help. I inform him, while looking around for my (nonexistant) coworkers, that I cannot leave my position. My position is vital. Without me there, on my four tiles (2 of which i'm fairly certain are lava), the entire stores order breaks down. There will be chaos and crying. I cannot leave. He appeals to my desire to not get in trouble, tells me he'll never tell my boss I left!
But, the chaos will ensue if I leave. Surely, my boss with notice people fist fighting each other for the next available register? I try to convey this to him, with my deepest sorrow, that I cannot leave my position. He looks angry, he cannot find his words. Finally, a cashier steps out from behind the register and assists him while the entire line glares at him for pulling one of four cashiers off a till.
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