Well, after going ages without any smelly customers, I seem to have suddenly hit the jackpot. In the past week, I've had another customer with that "stale sweat and old potato chip oil" smell, then these gemstone quality turds......
The first was a guy and his wife who just smelled like they hadn't bathed since the Eisenhower Administration, and the husband was just a complete dumbass on top of that. First of all, he hauled down a display desk from its riser and parked it right in the middle of an aisle, then engaged me in a protracted argument about the $7.99 chair assembly fee that was mentioned on the fact tag.
SC: So I buy this chair and get $7.99 rebate?
Me: No. That's the assembly fee. If you'd like us to build the chair for you, it's an extra $7.99.
SC: Oh, so you take $7.99 off the price of chair?
Me: No sir. If you want us to build the chair for you, we charge an extra $7.99.
SC:...........so there's a rebate of $7.99 if we have you build chair?
Me: NO! You PAY $7.99 MORE!
The argument wnt on a lot longer than that.....I had to explain it at least 6 ways from Sunday before I was able to hammer the concept through his head. Then he tried to get me to agree to an on-the-spot assembly, which I would not and could not do for him. I ended up having to flee and cash in a favor to have a CW finish with them.
Then, yesterday, while covering electronics, I dealt with two guys, one of which was a COMPLETE moron who thought he knew how to speak but didn't. I had to have him repeat every other sentence he uttered because he seemed to be suffering from some sort of aphasia. He seemed to want a printer with all the capabilities and features of a $400 all-in-one, but for under $100. Yeah....like that's going to happen. And it took seemingly forever to even get to that point because of his utter lack of communication skills besides blathering.
But the real problem was his traveling companion. I hesitate to even mention this, but it is relevant.....the guy was wheelchair bound, and obviously suffering from something that afforded him little control of his body. I'm not blaming him for this, but he smelled like he'd been pissing himself for days and his braindead-yet-walking companion hadn't bothered to get him cleaned up AT ALL. That was......saddening.....but also infuriating because it made the entire sale that much more difficult for me.
And finally, not long after the above Duo left, I was bringing a hand truck to the back room. I walked past one side of the furniture area and was suddenly struck right in the face with the horrid stench of rotting fish. Seriously.....if anyone here has had the misfortune of smelling canned mackerel fillets....just imagine what they'd smell like after going bad, and that's the foulness that was intruding upon my nostrils.
The source of the smell turned out to be a guy standing int he CENTER of the furniture area. I am NOT kidding when I say that his atrocious BO had enveloped the entire furniture bad, half the printer department, and extended partway down the aisles on both sides of furniture.....at least a 20 foot radius. It's good thing my turkey had gone bad, thus forcing me to go hungry on break, because otherwise I'd have puked it right back up.
SC: Excuse me!
Me:
I had to resort to covering my mouth and nose under a thinly veiled guise of being lost in thought while talking with him. Gross gross gross.
Thankfully, when he left he took his Stink Sphere with him, and the smell didn't linger behind.
The first was a guy and his wife who just smelled like they hadn't bathed since the Eisenhower Administration, and the husband was just a complete dumbass on top of that. First of all, he hauled down a display desk from its riser and parked it right in the middle of an aisle, then engaged me in a protracted argument about the $7.99 chair assembly fee that was mentioned on the fact tag.
SC: So I buy this chair and get $7.99 rebate?
Me: No. That's the assembly fee. If you'd like us to build the chair for you, it's an extra $7.99.
SC: Oh, so you take $7.99 off the price of chair?
Me: No sir. If you want us to build the chair for you, we charge an extra $7.99.
SC:...........so there's a rebate of $7.99 if we have you build chair?
Me: NO! You PAY $7.99 MORE!
The argument wnt on a lot longer than that.....I had to explain it at least 6 ways from Sunday before I was able to hammer the concept through his head. Then he tried to get me to agree to an on-the-spot assembly, which I would not and could not do for him. I ended up having to flee and cash in a favor to have a CW finish with them.
Then, yesterday, while covering electronics, I dealt with two guys, one of which was a COMPLETE moron who thought he knew how to speak but didn't. I had to have him repeat every other sentence he uttered because he seemed to be suffering from some sort of aphasia. He seemed to want a printer with all the capabilities and features of a $400 all-in-one, but for under $100. Yeah....like that's going to happen. And it took seemingly forever to even get to that point because of his utter lack of communication skills besides blathering.
But the real problem was his traveling companion. I hesitate to even mention this, but it is relevant.....the guy was wheelchair bound, and obviously suffering from something that afforded him little control of his body. I'm not blaming him for this, but he smelled like he'd been pissing himself for days and his braindead-yet-walking companion hadn't bothered to get him cleaned up AT ALL. That was......saddening.....but also infuriating because it made the entire sale that much more difficult for me.
And finally, not long after the above Duo left, I was bringing a hand truck to the back room. I walked past one side of the furniture area and was suddenly struck right in the face with the horrid stench of rotting fish. Seriously.....if anyone here has had the misfortune of smelling canned mackerel fillets....just imagine what they'd smell like after going bad, and that's the foulness that was intruding upon my nostrils.
The source of the smell turned out to be a guy standing int he CENTER of the furniture area. I am NOT kidding when I say that his atrocious BO had enveloped the entire furniture bad, half the printer department, and extended partway down the aisles on both sides of furniture.....at least a 20 foot radius. It's good thing my turkey had gone bad, thus forcing me to go hungry on break, because otherwise I'd have puked it right back up.
SC: Excuse me!
Me:

I had to resort to covering my mouth and nose under a thinly veiled guise of being lost in thought while talking with him. Gross gross gross.
Thankfully, when he left he took his Stink Sphere with him, and the smell didn't linger behind.
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