I was heckled

[customersruinmylife]

But it sounds like CRML had been telling the bar all along that the kitchen was running low and they didn't pay attention for some reason.

The bar staff aren't exactly the best listeners in the world

[MadMike]

You mean to tell me that when the bar I usually go to ran out of barbecue, I was supposed to harrass the bartender? Shows how stupid I am, I... I'm so ashamed to admit this... I actually ordered something else!

[Kristev]

Ordered something else? Without throwing a fit to get a free meal? Oh, how could you?

I'm only being cheeky. If it's inappropriate, I apologize.

[Jester]

It became a game to guess what they would have run out of each time we went, once it was beer...

They ran out of BEER?!?!?

But it sounds like CRML had been telling the bar all along that the kitchen was running low and they didn't pay attention for some reason.

Which makes the situation the service staff's fault, as I said.

[Magpie]

They ran out of BEER?!?!?

Well... I did mention DUSTED. Is there an engineering school nearby perchance? (It's an engineering hobby. Not sure why the other faculties don't do it. Scratch that. Not sure why engineering does it, but I've only ever seen them through engineering).

[Victoria J]

If you are going to be heckled then you obviously need to base your response on actual comedian put downs.

The classic, attributed to Billy Connolly is "Do I come to your work and tell you how to sweep up", on which I've heard a lot of much ruder variants which suggest the heckler is working as a prostitute. I actually prefer the ruder versions because I don't much like the suggestion that sweeping up is something to be sneered at.

Victoria J

[Broomjockey]

(It's an engineering hobby. Not sure why the other faculties don't do it. Scratch that. Not sure why engineering does it, but I've only ever seen them through engineering).

Ditto. Every school with a faculty of engineering that I've known people from, they all say the Engies are the big drinkers.

[Jester]

The classic, attributed to Billy Connolly is "Do I come to your work and tell you how to sweep up", on which I've heard a lot of much ruder variants which suggest the heckler is working as a prostitute.

The funniest thing I ever heard was a variant of this by one of my coworkers.

On one of our busiest nights of the year, during a major event, the crowd on the roof deck grew so large that we could not allow any more people up there. So management posted our very large bartender, The Wall, at the bottom of the stairs to deny access to more patrons. This one lady started to give him shit about him not allowing her by, to which he deadpanned, "Look lady--I don't come to your work and slap the dick out of your mouth."

I still laugh when I think about that one!

[dalesys]

...It's an engineering hobby. Not sure why the other faculties don't do it...

Because to be an engineer, you want as few faculties left as possible?

(I've had to introduce too damn many Electronics Engineers to real world components... Just because it says "12V regulator" does not mean that every single one puts out exactly 12.000000 volts under all conditions of input, loading, temperature and moon phase)

[Magpie]

Because to be an engineer, you want as few faculties left as possible?

I dunno, you can't have much left if you decided to come here in the first place... (and I base this on more than just the idiots who come and harass the TAs all the time, although they're not helping).

(I've had to introduce too damn many Electronics Engineers to real world components... Just because it says "12V regulator" does not mean that every single one puts out exactly 12.000000 volts under all conditions of input, loading, temperature and moon phase)

*wince* I'd rant about the amount of time that they spend teaching us this sort of thing, but even ignoring the fact that I've made that mistake (I know better, I just need to think before I remember it), I can think of several people in my class who are probably good for a five minute argument on that topic.

[mariamousie1]

I guess it didn't occur to them that circumstances might be beyond your control. Did the waitstaff explain that they were out of food? I'm guessing probably. If the waiter said something like "Sorry, you can't have what you ordered because the cook is an ass and he doesn't like you" he wouldn't have his job for very long.
So these people were just jerks.

[sprocket79]

This one lady started to give him shit about him not allowing her by, to which he deadpanned, "Look lady--I don't come to your work and slap the dick out of your mouth."

Hehehehe... Kathy Griffin makes that joke all the time! I doubt she came up with it, but she uses it. If I recall, she said it on some morning show like Good Morning America or The Today Show and got in big trouble for it.

[draftermatt]

Hehehehe... Kathy Griffin makes that joke all the time! I doubt she came up with it, but she uses it. If I recall, she said it on some morning show like Good Morning America or The Today Show and got in big trouble for it.

First time I heard it was Martin Lawrence to a heckler.

[Sakka]

Ditto. Every school with a faculty of engineering that I've known people from, they all say the Engies are the big drinkers.

At my school, it was the aviation students who would do that. On a weeknight.