Completely unreasonable requests

[cheese]

Have you ever had a customer who just demanded something completely out of proportion to the actual problem that they were having? I see this when browsing PFB all the time - people wanting a $50 giftcard because they had to queue for 2 minutes or something. But I think the lady I witnessed today has to take the biscuit.

I was on the checkout right next to the customer services desk, so although I didn't have to actually deal with this lady, I was a bit nosy and couldn't help listening in to what was going on (it was quite dead and I didn't have many customers to serve.)

Basically, she'd bought a bottle of cleaning product, Mr Muscle I think, and it was leaking. The employee at customer service agreed that it looked like the lid was damaged, and of course she could have a refund. The customer also wanted a refund on everything else she'd bought just incase the bottle had leaked on any of it - maybe a bit OTT, but she had a receipt and everything was refunded (she'd bought her shopping earlier that day, and when she realised it was leaking, she bought everything back.)

But was she happy with this? Of course not. Next, she wanted money to replace her SHOES. She said the cleaner had dripped out the bag on to them and completely ruined them. (She didn't bring these in for proof of course.. apparently she'd thrown them straight away.) At this point the customer service lady called a manager over as there was a bit of a queue. After the customer had a bit of a chat with the manager, the manager agreed to give her the money (£20) to replace her shoes. I guess he thought that £20 was worth it to keep the customer; fair enough.

Theres more..next, she wanted the employee who served her fired, for failing to notice the cleaner was leaking. Er hello..you didn't notice it either lady, it can't have been that obvious.. The manager said that he'd have a chat with the cashier and appropriate action would be taken. I really doubt anything came of that.

Hang on - it gets more ridiculous.. she then told the manager she wanted the cost of her CARPET replaced - she says some dripped on the carpet taking her bags through to the kitchen. The manager told her that we'd already been generous enough by paying her for her shoes, and that we really couldn't do any more for her. (its a cleaner.. its meant to clean things..it can't have ruined your carpet that badly.) When I heard her request this I actually gave a snort of laughter - I know I shouldn't, but I couldn't help myself at how ridiculous it was. Of course, she heard it and then wanted ME fired

After then hearing her request that every single bottle of cleaning product be taken off the shelves incase it was leaking, I had to stop listening in. I really couldn't control my laughter much longer. That woman just lived in her own crazy little world..

[CrazedClerk]

Wow that's pretty bad.

I can't compete with that, but I did deal with someone similar when I worked at the campus computer store when I was in college.

This woman wanted something, don't recall what. Anyway I looked around for it thoroughly before deducing we didn't have it in stock. Upon informing her of this, her response was: "well can you call around and see if you can find some place that does?" She wasn't just talking about affiliated stores (which of course we had none since we were an internal operation of the college) she wanted me to call ANY computer store (read: our competition) to try and find something for her.

What I did say: "I'm sorry ma'am I can't do that."
What I WANTED to say: "Do your own legwork you lazy bitch, I'm not your personal servant!"

[Lace Neil Singer]

Probably the guy who's bottle of fizzy water fell off the conveyor belt (cuz he was daft enough to stand it up) and then demanded that *supermarket* pay for the cleaning bill for his soaked trousers. Err, water damages clothes? Since when? XD

[Drakstern]

Err, water damages clothes? Since when?

What, you think people are going to buy that special 'not damaged by water' clothing?

That's how they get ya!

More seriously, the closest I've ever had to one of these is the one day I worked in the deli at Massive Ursine. I was filling in for someone, and had never worked it before so I was a little bit slow on doing stuff at the start, but picked up on most of the easy stuff by the end of the night.

Naturally, around 8:50, a... best term for it is ultra-yuppie pulls his entirely full cart up to the counter. He wanted some sliced ham. Now, that's no problem, we had plenty.

But no, he wanted it fresh sliced, and he wanted it sliced a specific thickness. Normally not a problem either. Except it's 8:50. All the slicers have been cleaned, and on this day broken down for a more extensive cleaning over night.

He throws a FIT. About how far he drove to get to the store, about how this always happens(Well, if you come in 10 minutes before the department closes...), about how Krogers would never do this to him, and how dare we treat a customer like this and he wants to speak to a manager and he's going to sue us and...

Well, he just keeps going on and on. So, we call the manager. The manager's response?

"Sir, it's 8:50. The Deli closes at 9:00. Now, if you'd like, we could put the slicer back together and cut your meat, but that will take another fifteen minutes and, frankly, the slicer's in a bucket of cleaning solution at the moment, and your ham will probably taste funny."

The yuppie sputters for another moment, then, with a 'I'm calling your corporate office!' he leaves his cart and exits through the entrance door.

[Channard]

You should have walked off on a break, leaving the bottle of Mr Muscle on your chair. And when the customer and manager complained, reply.. 'It says on the bottle.. 'Does the jobs you hate'

[HawaiianShirts]

Unreasonable requests? Yes, I've had those. Some have asked me to call around to competitors, looking for an obscure computer part. Some have demanded something free because I did not immediately respond to them when they entered the department (usually because I didn't see them or was busy with someone else). Some demand free stuff simply because it's "not fair" or inconvenient that some cable or piece of software is not included with their product.

There was lawyer guy who wanted a new laptop because his was broken. He had let his brother SLEEP ON IT, and the screen was now severely cracked. We denied him a new computer, but that didn't stop him. He also demanded that we put up signs warning people to not sleep on their computers, that the laptops we sold were flimsy, and that they should only be used as "coffee table laptops." Nope. Manager kicked him out. There's no sign up, but I do tell customers about him as kind of a joke that says, "You're not THAT stupid, right? Right. Just take reasonably good care of your computer."

A common one goes like this:
SC: I want this $499 sale computer.
Me: I'm sorry, I'm sold out at the moment.
SC: Are you getting any more?
Me: No, not before the sale is over. I can order one for you. It'll be the same price but take about a week to arrive, or I can give you a raincheck for it.
SC: No. You can just sell me this one ($999 non-sale computer) for the same price.
- or -
SC: No. You can just give me this one ($999 non-sale computer) for free because of the inconvenience you've caused me.

The worst I can remember from my store went like this:
- Woman buys a laptop and has our techs set up her Windows and security for her.
- Woman picks up her laptop an hour later when it was done and drives home.
- Woman starts using her computer on the battery.
- Woman realizes the battery is running low and looks for the power cable. Oops. Techs accidentally kept her power cable.
- Woman calls to complain, having a good reason to do so.
- Manager understands her complaints and offers a $50 gift card as apology for our mistake.
- Woman doesn't like that. She starts making demands. She wanted to return the laptop for a full refund, be reimbursed for her gas money (for about a ten-mile one-way trip), have the responsible tech publicly apologize before being fired and fined, AND get a $500 gift card for her trouble.
- As it was me talking to her on the phone (and relaying to and from the manager when necessary), I was left to respond to her comments. I said, "That's not possible."
- Woman screams something unintelligable and slams down the phone.
- Woman comes into the store screaming my name and demanding a manager. Of course, I was to be publicly fired along with the tech now.
- Manager discusses the situation with the woman with remarkable self-control.
- Woman leaves with her laptop cable and a $50 gift card as apology for our mistake. Nobody got fired.

(Sorry it's so long a reply. I just like telling stories. Thanks for bringing these to mind.)

[Kiwi]

we sold 5cent curling ribbon by the metre

thats 5 lousy cents a metre ok......

someone wanted 150 metres, in 1 metre lengths.....of course comes up at closing....

if its $2 a metre and you want 5 metres cut out like that, we could make an exception but you have got to be kidding me when you want me to spend 15 minutes cutting up $7 worth of ribbon because your to lazy to.

our store had a one cut policy, we werent there to cut out your pattern (that was asked daily) nor are we here to make the ribbon you just brought into bows.... you want 5 metres, you get 5 metres all in one go.

[Cosmic Cat]

Customer: Will you wrap my wife's present for me?
Me: No.
Customer: But JC Penny wraps presents!
Me: I'm sorry, but we don't do that. Would you like a pre-wrapped gift box?
Customer: NO!

[Becks]

Cheese, GREAT story!!!!!!!

No matter how many stories I read on here, I'm always surprised by some customers.

[Mr. Rude]

My last customer today.....10 minutes before close...Keep in mind there are 8 other people in the store, either staff or family members thereof waiting for staff..

BTW, I work a computer shop.

Enter f**kchop....

He's looking for an RCA to VGA adapter to use his DVD player with an LCD monitor. Of course I kinda scratch my head because I haven't seen/heard of this. I peruse our cable wall *scratches head* & tell same asshat that "I don't recall ever seeing something like that before".

S**thead pipes up "Well then, I guess I better go ask at a REAL computer store then".

I respond..."Or you could actually LOOK UP the item that you want online before hand? Maybe give me a manufacturer part or number?"

Staff buddy walks past (with much more knowledge of these types of items).. I ask him if he's even heard of this "cable"

His response to me (with a look).. They...don't...exist.

Me: Mmmm...*turns to asshat* well then. And it just so happens I found a weird adapter for you online that costs about $469 dollars...US dollars.....How many do you need to order there buddy?

In the end, our heroes more savvy multimedia work pal took care of this d****it...But he still wasted ALL of our time till 5 minutes after we closed. EVEN after being told the 8 people standing around were waiting for him to leave.

Some people just deserve to be ass****ed with a red hot poker dipped in wet gravel....slowly.....

/endrant

[friendofjimmyk]

Some people just deserve to be ass****ed with a red hot poker dipped in wet gravel....slowly.....

Wow. Just. Wow.

[B&NGoddess]

Wow. Just. Wow.

exactly. sounds rather brutal.

on topic now.

magazines are non returnable unless there's something seriously wrong with them. lady comes in with an armload and wants money back. no. she throws a fit, screaming about how we're stupid and and she works in real estate and make more money and she's smarter etc etc. the answer is still no. she says that the mags are missing things. we look. the mags are UK editions, and the inserts are only available in the UK. it says so right on the packaging. well, now her husband is going to be mad at her because she bought all these mags and cant return them, what should she do now, omgwtfbbq!!!!

should i call the waaaaaaaahmbulance?

[Mr. Rude]

Sorry about being a wee bit too descriptive there....I had just returned home from work & was still a tad peeved

[Kusanagi]

Most unreasonable request I ever had was about a year and a half ago. A customer had purchased a leather sectional from me and I gave him the measurements. 4 months later after it was imported, we tried to deliver it and he wanted it in his 3rd story living room (the guy had a McMansion). Our drivers did not know this, and the sectional did not fit up the stairs (it was 12 feet long.)

So we get it back to the warehouse and he is pissed. I spoke with him a few times and I explained that he would need to pay a redelivery fee for the furniture since it was in no way our fault the piece didn't fit - I guess he never thought that while the house was huge, the stairwell wasn't.

He reluctantly agrees to get the furniture redelivered as he says there's another way to get it into the house. I'm like "ooookay" and set up the redelivery. We get out there and the idiot had rented a crane to get the thing in through his skylight.

Our drivers see this and go "oh HELL no" and tell the guy that if he's gonna do it, then they have to sign for the furniture now and the drivers would in no way do anything except take the furniture off the truck and put it on the curb. The guy does not agree to this. He wants the drivers to sling it, guide it through, and wanted the piece to be insured. Yeah right.

I get flooded with phonecalls from him and the drivers at the same time and he is stating he's gonna sue the hell out of us because we didn't complete the delivery. Bottom line:

1) He wants me fired
2) He wants the driver fired
3) He wants the piece redelivered for free
4) He wants us to pay for the crane he just rented
5) He wants us to pay for a SECOND crane rental for delivery
6) He wants the piece at half off or more because of the hassle he has had to go through.

The total cost to the company (in just monetary value, not the cost/time it would take to replace the driver and I) would have been somewhere in the area of about 5k to make this douchebag happy.

I actually laughed on the phone when he said that he would settle for no less than this. He got pissed, naturally, and I pointed out the contract says nothing about us being able to hoist furniture.

He comes back in and demands his money back and I authorize everything except the delivery fees returned. This wasn't good enough, he claimed I wasn't helping him at all and I said "Yes, I am helping you. Normally, on special order imports when you cancel we keep 40% of the total to cover costs, plus any delivery fees. I'm refunding back everything but $400 back, normally in this case we're perfectly justified to charge you 2k for cancelling."

His jaw hit the floor, and he walked out without another word. We took the sectional and sold it to a nice family at just over cost, and they loved it.

[Imogene]

I actually witnessed this one while my brother, his fiancee, and I were in the mall today. We were in American Greetings, you know? The card store/knick-knack shop?

Bro, fiancee, and I were perusing the Christmas cards for their respective bosses and friends. I'm busy trying to keep out of other people's ways, as it was a madhouse in that store, when I hear from the front of the store, "I hate this store... where's a Hallmark in this mall?"

*blink, blink* I look up and toward the door, and there's a woman with a stroller talking to one of the store employees, and it's pretty obvious she was the one who asked where the Hallmark was.

Lady shortly disappears, after I hear the employee say she doesn't know.

Bro, fiancee, and I leave after buying a handful of cards, and once we're free, I double-check with Bro and fiancee to make sure I heard the woman right.

Yup, apparently, I did.