Land of the Pee and the Home of the Vague...

[Amina516]

Wow..Ive had a spechul last few weeks at work to say the least.


Land of the Pee...

*You know, if you dont have bladder issues, asking to go to the bathroom LITERALLY every 5 minutes, is a little too much. Actually, no, it IS too damn much. I tend to lean towards you're asking because you're bored. You practically told me so. Therefore, I will deny you the bathroom and ask you to wait for it to build up. What? You still have to pee? Ok, Here's a foley catheter, spread em! Oh, you miraculously dont have to pee anymore??..ok, maybe next time. *patient then proceeds to sleep for the next 5 hrs*

*Also, if you're a man/woman who hasnt been out of bed in a few days and have been refusing your physical therapy, we will not be getting you up for the first time @ 3am because you "feel like walking". Im sorry, its honestly dangerous, heres a urinal/bedpan if you gotta go. I don't feel like peeling you off the floor. Wait for physical therapy in the morning.

Home of the Vague

It seems, as soon as I step in the hospital, people smell me. Maybe its the uniform. As you guys are well aware, I dont know everything. People expect me to though. Not really sure why.

Convo the First

Me: *Walking in the side entrance to the hospital. Usually deserted*
Random Person: Hey..Im looking for *random dept Ive never heard of."
Me: Im sorry. Where?
RP: *repeats random dept*
Me: Im sorry, youre going to have to use one of the help phones and call information. Im not sure where you mean.
RP: *nasty tone* WTF! Why? You should know!
Me: Youd think I would, huh? Have a great evening.
RP. Well...Wheres the phone?!
Me: Seems I dont know that either. Night! *Now, I DID know where the phone was but he was being a dick so i let him wander. Dont mess with me after I wake up and have to go back to work almost immediately...its not pretty*

Convo the Second

Me: *Waiting for the elevator..On the ground floor, where theres just the cafeteria, ER and radiology departments*
Person: Hey, what room I can find Mr. So and Sos room, ive been walking around this same floor for ages. I cant remember his room number.

Now, Id like to pause for a sec and point out some things:

a. I am not a directory.
b. There are about 500 patients in this hospital at any one time. To walk up to a random employee and ask for a specific patient with no other info...dude, seriously? WTF.

Me:Well, you're going to have to use the Information phone right over there *points* and ask them. I don't know. And just so you know, there are no patient rooms on this floor.
Person: Well, dammit. Why have I been walking around here then?! I thought you worked here, You should know.
Me: Sir, do u really expect me to know every single patients name that is in this hospital?
Person: I guess not. Thanks anyways. *heads to phone*
Me: *redemption dance!!!! WIN!*

Convo the Third

Im sitting at the front desk on my floor, doing paperwork. A doctor walks up (I only know his a doctor b/c he has on a yellow nametag) but I have no idea who he is.

Dr: Is my patient here yet?
Me: I can check. Who's your patient?
Dr: Uh, I don't know their name.
Me: Room number?
Dr: Don't know that either. I cant find my papers.

*So once again. Ill pause. I don't know your name. You don't know the patients name. You dont know the room and yet you expect me to know for some damn reason.*

Me: Well we've had 4 admissions. Room 3 is the newest one. You may want to check there.
Dr: *Looks dumbfounded that I didnt go scrambling to find out for him but walks away*.

Sigh.

[TonyF]

It's amazing, isn't it?

People seem to think that just because you work there, you are supposed to know every thing about every thing, every nook and cranny, and are able to decipher their vague descriptions. Sorry you have to deal with that as it is nerve-wracking.

I get people coming up to my photo counter with these huge 35mm cameras that are at least 50 years old and wondering why it doesn't work. A fair inquiry. But they shouldn't get mad if I can't figure out exactly what's wrong.

Vagueness is a bit more annoying. A customer came in while I was on lunch and dropped off his memory card (something I don't allow them to do but since I was on lunch, who would stop them?) and had wrote down on his envelope his name and the word, "Prints." Ok, so he wants prints, but how many of each, what size, blah blah. He didn't even leave his phone number so I could call him to clarify. I felt no sympathy at all went he came in later and threw a fit because I got the order wrong.

People, man, I swear.

[dalesys]

...Home of the Vague

...Convo the Third
... A doctor walks up (I only know his a doctor b/c he has on a yellow nametag) but I have no idea who he is...

Could have sent him to the morgue... to protect the (living) patients.

[Imogene]

I felt no sympathy at all went he came in later and threw a fit because I got the order wrong.

Really? You actually tried to fill that? I wouldn't have... I would suggest a minimum of information necessary before fulfilling an order, otherwise, you've wasted your time by dropping off a memory card. You're not psychic, anything you try, except for exactly what they wanted, will be wrong. Your chances of getting it wrong are massive.

[Pagan]

I get people that, despite the fact that right under my name it says, "Certified Pharmacy Technician", will stop me and ask me questions about the men's clothing.

[Andara Bledin]

Dr: *Looks dumbfounded that I didnt go scrambling to find out for him but walks away*.

But... but... He's a doctor! And you're not. How could you possibly make him do something himself when you could take up twice the manpower by letting him wait and do nothing while you went and checked for him?
</sarcasm>

I felt no sympathy at all went he came in later and threw a fit because I got the order wrong.

I, too, am surprised you even did the order. I wouldn't have.

^-.-^

[TonyF]

Really? You actually tried to fill that? I wouldn't have... I would suggest a minimum of information necessary before fulfilling an order, otherwise, you've wasted your time by dropping off a memory card. You're not psychic, anything you try, except for exactly what they wanted, will be wrong. Your chances of getting it wrong are massive.

I, too, am surprised you even did the order. I wouldn't have.

Well, I guess I was trying to be the hero and ended up as the village idiot.

Understanding vagueness is a task that I think I won't undergo again unless further specified. Lesson learned.

[BlaqueKatt]

Ok, Here's a foley catheter, spread em!

I will say whoever invented that thing-I actually love them-having one while in the hospital 8 months preggers-it was great not having to get out of bed every 10 minutes to use the restroom.....

[Shalom]

whoever invented that thing

If I had to guess, I'd say his name was probably Doctor Foley...

[DGoddessChardonnay]

I will say whoever invented that thing-I actually love them-having one while in the hospital 8 months preggers-it was great not having to get out of bed every 10 minutes to use the restroom.....

I had to have one years ago when in the ED for a lower back spasm. I couldn't stand up, let alone walk and had been in bed the night before not able to move.

I was never so happy to pee in all my life (so far) . . .

[Kristev]

I've had to be like that, have to piss every few minutes. Every day of my life, actually. But in my case, there's a reason. It's not boredom, it's diabetes. But even I can last about thirty minutes between trips, usually forty-five. Urination every five minutes? That's ridiculous.

[Amina516]

I've had to be like that, have to piss every few minutes. Every day of my life, actually. But in my case, there's a reason. It's not boredom, it's diabetes. But even I can last about thirty minutes between trips, usually forty-five. Urination every five minutes? That's ridiculous.

Like I said, if theres a true issue, I have no problem whatsoever getting/giving you the help you need. Im not that heartless.. But someone who is JUST trying to monopolize my time, and make a smart ass comment as such every time I walk in there....ugh. Its mind numbing. And bitch mode will switch on..