I'm a smart-ass (short and bitter)

[Shironu-Akaineko]

I think I can get away with murder at work now. I almost did after the guy through the glass door incident.

-Manager arrives after the glass door incident, looks at the giant pool of blood, asks what happened.
"Well, this one customer really got on my nerves..."

-Man keeps asking questions about his cellphone, I keep trying to refer him to the cellphone guys. Finally, he looked up at at me, annoyed, and said "Well you don't know anything, do you??"

Me: "Well sir, actually I do. That's why they put me in the VIDEO GAMES, MUSIC AND MOVIE section! For cellphones, you wanna ask the CELLPHONE department!"

Youngish customer complains "Well it's much cheaper on the internet! Why is it so expensive here!"

Me: "Well, that would be because they don't have a store to rent and employees to pay!"
He was complaining about a 20$ item. Woop-dee-doo.

Customers at the other end of my deparment lifts a CD up and asks "Hey, What is this?"
Me: "Well, I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that's a CD!"

Many, many customers,a all week long "When's Twilight coming out?"
Me: "In X days, says so on the giant lifesize cardboard cutout outside."
Customers: I didn't see it!"
Me: "You just pointed at it. You gotta look LOWER than Edward and Jacob's faces."

Yeah, I got a lil tired by the end of the week on that "I didn't see it!" bullshit.

Today we're finally selling the New Moon DVDs, I have no idea where I'm gonna display them and for shits n giggles I'm gonna wear a bit of body glitter for work.

The short and bitter part was referring to me, not the topic.

I still love my job~

:UPDATE: New one for today
Two kids grab the Diablo II 3-pack, come up to me and ask "Is this game copyable?"
Me: "I don't know, seeing as I tend to BUY my games." While waving around and giving them the evil eye.

What kinda answer did they expect, "Oh yes and while we're at it, let me order you a Mod Chip and a ROM card!"

[Soulstealer]

Customers: I didn't see it!"
Me: "You just pointed at it. You gotta look LOWER than Edward and Jacob's crotches."

Fixed for accuracy and my amusement.

[Shironu-Akaineko]

Thank you for saying what we were ALL thinking.

(It's doubly funny cuz the date is at their ankles)

[depechemodefan]

Thank you for saying what we were ALL thinking.

(It's doubly funny cuz the date is at their ankles)

I was thinking "look lower/higher than Jacob's abs."

I have no idea where I'm gonna display them and for shits n giggles I'm gonna wear a bit of body glitter for work.

That would be awesome. If I was working today, I think it would have been cool. Also, why the frick it's coming out on Sat? So the tweens can having "dvd debut" party at mid Fri. night? Ugh. I work at a library, and i put the dvd on hold. I'm not at work today to pick it up, and none of the Circ people could tell me where they kept the copies yesterday. But I'm betting, just like for HPath-bP, some shithole in Circ will pick it up, the one reserved for me, and keep it for a whole freakin' week.

[Shironu-Akaineko]

I'm already down to 5 copies on the floor and I'm all glittered up. I went sparingly (I made a typo and spelled it Sparkingly, lol) on it cuz I'm supposed to be a Twilight vampire, not a discoball, wore dark clothes and red branches on my custom glasses. XP

[Seraph]

Two kids grab the Diablo II 3-pack, come up to me and ask "Is this game copyable?"
Me: "I don't know, seeing as I tend to BUY my games." While waving around and giving them the evil eye.

Oh DANG! You should've just smiled sweetly and said yes!!

Because if you copy the game, and therefore reuse the CD key...the second they logged onto Battle.net, BOTH of their copies would've been instantly banned. Leaving them with a useless game.

Would've LOVED to see their faces when they realize they have a nice plastic frisbee from their attempt at piracy.

PS: I know you don't HAVE to do online play, but really, who plays it offline anymore?

[Amina516]

I was thinking "look lower/higher than Jacob's abs."

Does such a place exist?


Id have to disagree...

*goes off to drool @ New Moon*

[Shironu-Akaineko]

Oh DANG! You should've just smiled sweetly and said yes!!

Because if you copy the game, and therefore reuse the CD key...the second they logged onto Battle.net, BOTH of their copies would've been instantly banned. Leaving them with a useless game.

I did not know that.
Would have gotten me in real trouble if I said yes tho, they would have come back with Mommy and complained... But I bet they would probably try it anyway...

[Bloodsoul]

Customers at the other end of my deparment lifts a CD up and asks "Hey, What is this?"
Me: "Well, I'm gonna take a wild guess and say that's a CD!"

See.. dee? What are those!? Do they play .mp3s?

I always smirk when I see Randal in Clerks going to Big Choice Video with its aisles and aisles of video cassettes. DVDs are already on their way out, and I doubt Blu-Ray will really last that much longer before everything'll eventually be download only.

[draco664]

I did not know that.
Would have gotten me in real trouble if I said yes tho, they would have come back with Mommy and complained... But I bet they would probably try it anyway...

Complained about what? They asked if the game was copy-able. It obviously was, since they managed to make a copy.

They didn't ask if you could re-use the game key...

[Shironu-Akaineko]

Pssssh, go figure, had a guy when I first started working there blaming US for a game HE obviously destroyed.

[Andara Bledin]

Two kids grab the Diablo II 3-pack, come up to me and ask "Is this game copyable?"
Me: "I don't know, seeing as I tend to BUY my games." While waving around and giving them the evil eye.

What kinda answer did they expect, "Oh yes and while we're at it, let me order you a Mod Chip and a ROM card!"

Pretty much all data can be copied. Some easier than others.

But why the hell would you want to copy that and be locked into offline only play?

[just had the game & expansion added to her Battle.net account]

PS: I know you don't HAVE to do online play, but really, who plays it offline anymore?

I do. About 3 times a year. Because I can't always get online at the convention, and Steam won't start in offline mode on my computer for no good reason so I can't play Torchlight.

^-.-^

[Crossbow]

PS: I know you don't HAVE to do online play, but really, who plays it offline anymore?

I pretty much have one game only that I play online, and then just with the people I'm friends with. Otherwise I play solo. I won't even play LAN with my wife.

[Stryker One]

Ugh.

Watched the Sparkly Emo movie this weekend with the wife; kept wishing Blade would show up.

[Mongo Skruddgemire]

Many, many customers,a all week long "When's Twilight coming out?"
Me: "In X days, says so on the giant lifesize cardboard cutout outside."
Customers: I didn't see it!"
Me: "You just pointed at it. You gotta look LOWER than Edward and Jacob's faces."

I got to say something like to a friend of mine. Only in his case it was Tomb Raider and I got to say "Dude! It's on the bottom of the cutout. You need to look lower than Angelina Jolie's tits."