Just looking? I call bull.

[ZedOmega]

Got a nice one from just a few hours ago, and I wanted to tell you guys about it while it was still fresh on my mind.

When I work, I wear a pair of fingerless weightlifter's gloves and a black leather jacket. Although the question I get the most is if I do MMA, the gloves are just for show. The palms are supple leather, which is supposed to help with grip, so they might be needed one of these days, but I noticed that we have some calmer nights when I wear them on shift. These have given me reason to start thinking of them as 'Gloves of Moron Repulsion'.

I'd taken them off at one point because I wanted to let my hands breathe for a little while. One of our regulars, who I'll just refer to as 'J' from here on out, was talking to me about the work he does doing roadside assistance. I noticed at one point, however, that there was someone standing by our windows, just... waving at someone inside.

I'd never seen him before, so let's call this guy 'SS' from here. 'Sucky Stranger'. The conversaion went like this:

Me: Sir, if you're not going to come into the bar, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave immediately.
SS: This is a sidewalk.
Me: Yes, but it's a sidewalk in front of our bar, and you're in front of one of our windows.
SS: ...I know the people inside.
Me: Really? Give me some names.
SS: (long, LONG pause) I just know the people inside.
Me: Names.
SS: Well--

At this point, I noticed that he was reaching for... something on one of our power boxes. Turns out someone had left a couple of empty beer bottles there (I wonder who...).

Me: Wait, what the hell are you doing? Don't grab those; you don't know where those came from!
SS: Okay. (He sets them down at this point.) Can't tell me what to ****ing do...

SS said that last part in a tone of voice that set off a warning signal in my brain. J, who was watching this whole thing, noticed me putting one of my feet forward while I was undoing the snaps of my jacket cuffs. I don't like fighting, but if I feel like it's going to come at some point, I want to be ready for it.

SS: (to J) Dude, can't you tell him something?
J: Man, he works here. If he says you gotta go, you gotta go.
SS: (turning back to me) Alright, I'll just go next door, then...

SS then slumps off. Apparently he realized he was outnumbered, and that if he swung at me, J was going to jump in and back me up. As soon as he was out of sight, I grabbed the bottles he was reaching for and threw them in the trash can.

Times like this make me wonder about people...

[Jester]

To be fair to the guy, he was on the sidewalk, not on the bar property. While I have no doubt that you meant well and were protecting the interests of your bar, legally you may not have had much solid footing. I've actually dealt with this very situation, but from the other side.

Background: Several years ago, MTV was down in Key West for Spring Break, filming a bunch of their usual idiotic stuff. As part of this, they paid a local outdoor bar a boatload of money to film in the bar for various shows and whatnot. The bar in question was on the corner of Duval Street (our main drag) and another street. Now the bar, while it was outside, was fenced in, so where the bar ended and the public sidewalk began was clearly delineated.

One day, while they were filming whatever it was they were filming within said bar, they had a bunch of hired goons sitting on chairs outside the fence to keep idiots away. Totally understandable.

At one point, I was talking to my friend Jared as we were walking down Duval. At one point, we stopped on the corner of Duval and this other street and continued to chat. At which point one of the goonsl lumbered out of his seat and approached us.

Goon: "You guys are going to have to move along."
Jared and I pointedly ignore him and continue our conversation.
Goon: "I said you guys are going to have to go."
Me: "No. No we're not."
Goon: "I don't think you understand. We're filming here, and you guys need to go."
Me: "Oh, I understand perfectly. MTV paid [Bar Name] a shitload of money, and they are filming in there, well within their rights. But we are not IN [Bar Name]. We are out here on the public sidewalk. And as far as I know, MTV didn't pay anyone anything for the right to public walkways. As members of the public, we are well within our rights to enjoy our conversation right here. Now, go away." And I made a dismissive shooing motion towards him.

I should point out here that this hired goon was much larger than me (as hired goons tend to be, me being all of 5'8" and (at the time) about 140 lbs. I should also point out that Jared, taller than me but still thin, was starting to look nervous about the whole thing. He was ready to go. Me, I was standing my ground. Part of my orneriness might be the fact that I have nothing but contempt for the brainless drivel that MTV programs.

Goon: "Whatever. You still need to go."
Me: "No. No I don't."
Goon: "Don't make me get the police involved."
Me: "You do whate you need to do, pal."

So the goon wanders off. Jared is giving me shit, saying "Come on, man. Let's just go." I was having none of it. "Fuck that. We aren't doing anything wrong. Fuck him and fuck MTV!"

A few moments later, the goon comes back, looking a bit smug, with a police officer in tow. His smugness wouldn't last long, though. Actually, his face deflated the minute the cop opened his mouth and addressed me.

Cop: "Magic Man! What's up? How ya been?"
Me: "Hey, what's up Bob? How's Brenda and little Bobby?"

Yep, you got it. The goon had gone off and found one of the only cops (at the time) that I knew by name, and more importantly, that knew ME by name. He, his wife and child, and their friends were all regulars at the restaurant I performed magic at on the weekends.

Once again, it pays to be known.

Again, I need to stress that I am not equating YOU with the goon in my story. Just saying that, while you were doing what you saw as necessary to protect your employer's interest, you may have been overstepping your bounds by ordering around someone on the public sidewalk. Bar bouncers do it all the time, I know. Doesn't make it legal.

Just saying.

[Plaidman]

Indeed. I've gotten in trouble myself by getting police involved with one of our own regular shoplifting scum. He was outside my store, trying to panhandle but knows somehow which ones to go for that won't immeditly tattle to me, so I have no idea if he really is panhandling, or getting money for job, getting loans back, or any of the other idiotic lies he tell. He would sometimes make faces at me, and basically just driving me nuts with his mere prescece, since we all know he comes in here when new people work and just steal like crazy until he's caught and just leaves.

So yeah, I called police. Despite them knowing he steals from us, but due to corporate office lack of, well, pressing charges (They just want to write it off, and let him back in. Because he might buy that quarter item, and that's MONEY!), the cop really couldn't do anything. There was no proof he was making faces at me. No proof he was panhandling. The cop said sorry, and he could try to get him to move along, which the bum declared his rights to be on sidewalks.


Just, be careful. Had you thrown a punch first? You would be in jail likely. I understand the urge to do what you do, I do it too. Your alarm is going off a million miles a second.

But sadily, alot of scum and dirtbags can get away by just pushing your buttons to break minor laws, while they dash around the issues. It sucks, and one more reason I hate this world.

[Andara Bledin]

So the goon wanders off. Jared is giving me shit, saying "Come on, man. Let's just go." I was having none of it. "Fuck that. We aren't doing anything wrong. Fuck him and fuck MTV!"

Depending on the permits they got from the city, it's possible that they could have had permission to keep the adjoining sidewalk clear.

Of course, the lack of any notification to that effect tells me they didn't bother because they were cheap, most likely.

I do know that when Extreme Home Improvement (I hate their crew, now) rebuild the house across the street from where I was living, all of the local houses got notification that we'd have to put up with a week's (ha! try two weeks, lying cretins) worth of noise, 24 hours a day, plus the likelihood that they'd be closing off that little section of street intermittently during that period.

They only actually closed it off once, when they had the fire engine (I hope they had to pay a shit-ton for that, too) to pump water into the rebuilt pool. And then they had to pump it all out again, since the stuff coming from the fire plug was rusty as hell, and refill it after they'd cleared enough to get clear water.

^-.-^

[Jester]

There was no proof he was making faces at me.

Have to point out that even if there had been proof of this, this is not illegal.

Depending on the permits they got from the city, it's possible that they could have had permission to keep the adjoining sidewalk clear.

Of course, the lack of any notification to that effect tells me they didn't bother because they were cheap, most likely.

Correct. MTV. Aka cheap. They rented out the bar, and I recognized their right to control who went into that bar and what they did that. I said as much to the goon. But they had made no such deal with the city, and as such, they had no right at all to tell us what to do or where to go when we were outside of the bar property, on the public sidewalks.

The cop pointed out to the goon that this was in fact the case.

By the way, when the cop walked up and greeted me warmly, the goon's face was priceless.