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  • Hellllllooo Magazine

    Just got this relayed to me by the bf - he's reading through the War Stories at the moment

    He works at a service station and last night just before he left he notices a gentleman at the magazines, near the sealed magazines.

    These are also the magazines that have the seal blacked out so all you can see is the title, yea, you know the ones.

    The gentleman (if that is indeed what he was, a gentleman and not some other male hybrid) was trying to get the plastic away from the magazine so he could take a peek.

    Gentleman then leaned closer to the magazines, and then proceeded to lick the magazine.

    Now I don't know how much you can even hope to see when playing with the seal of porn mags, but is it really enough to lick them? Do you even know what you are licking?

    Bf was just about to finish his shift, so left this gentleman for a CW to deal with.

    Fortunately this isn't the most unsavoury thing he has witnessed with these magazines, there was the one gentleman (I guess they are gentleman in some ways) who disappeared into the toilet after purchasing one and did not reappear for quite some time...
    Began work Aug as casual '08
    Ex-coworkers from current place of work: 26ish
    Current co-workers at current place of work: 15ish - yes he just hired 3 more casuals
    Why do I still work there again?

  • #2


    He licked the magazine?! That's... yikes. That's beyond creepy.
    My other car is a Mackinaw.

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    • #3
      Here's hoping for a paper cut

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      • #4
        Perhaps he just likes his porn to be in good taste.
        "All I've ever learned from love was how to shoot somebody who out-drew ya"

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        • #5
          Quoth Sheldonrs View Post
          Perhaps he just likes his porn to be in good taste.
          Oh, that was BAD! LOL!

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          • #6
            Quoth Aut View Post
            Oh, that was BAD! LOL!
            Yeah, Sheldonrs urkestrates all our best porns.
            I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
            Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
            Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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            • #7
              Quoth ottid View Post
              who disappeared into the toilet after purchasing one and did not reappear for quite some time...
              Did your on again, off again girlfriend who's getting married to a civil engineer happen to run into said customer, have the erotic session of her life, and then the paralyzing freak out because said guy was actually dead?
              "I call murder on that!"

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              • #8
                At least he purchased it before disappearing to the bathroom. Media Play had a lot of people "borrow" (steal *cough* steal) magazines for private entertainment. gag.
                A lion however, will only devour your corpse, whereas an SC is not sated until they have destroyed your soul. (Quote per infinitemonkies)

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                • #9
                  Quoth Juwl View Post
                  Did your on again, off again girlfriend who's getting married to a civil engineer happen to run into said customer, have the erotic session of her life, and then the paralyzing freak out because said guy was actually dead?
                  Clerks?
                  I used to be disgusted... Now I'm just amused

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Sheldonrs View Post
                    Perhaps he just likes his porn to be in good taste.
                    Critical hit! ZedOmega takes 315 damage!
                    ZedOmega is unconscious!

                    OW.
                    My other car is a Mackinaw.

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                    • #11
                      Impressive, Sheldon! Two with one bl-- er, pun!

                      Tho I suppose he must have thought himself rather cunning, and that he would remain unseen >_>
                      "For a musician, the SNES sound engine is like using Crayola Crayons. Nobuo Uematsu used Crayola Crayons to paint the Sistine Chapel." - Jeremy Jahns (re: "Dancing Mad")
                      "The difference between an amateur and a master is that the master has failed way more times." - JoCat
                      "Thinking is difficult, therefore let the herd pronounce judgment!" ~ Carl Jung
                      "There's burning bridges, and then there's the lake just to fill it with gasoline." - Wiccy, reddit
                      "Retail is a cruel master, and could very well be the most educational time of many people's lives, in its own twisted way." - me
                      "Love keeps her in the air when she oughta fall down...tell you she's hurtin' 'fore she keens...makes her a home." - Capt. Malcolm Reynolds, "Serenity" (2005)
                      Acts of Gord – Read it, Learn it, Love it!
                      "Our psychic powers only work if the customer has a mind to read." - me

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                      • #12
                        I find magazines (Not true porn, since I work for the blue store of unhappiness) which do, in fact have almost entirely nude girls in them, in the bathrooms that I clean. It's not frequent, but it happens. And condoms, and . . . well, it's bad.
                        Customers should always be served . . . to the nearest great white.

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Juwl View Post
                          Did your on again, off again girlfriend who's getting married to a civil engineer happen to run into said customer, have the erotic session of her life, and then the paralyzing freak out because said guy was actually dead?
                          I'm not even supposed to be here today.
                          There had to be DUMB in the water today. - Summerfly413

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