Would YOU like being woken up from a nap? I don't think so.

[BuggedMei]

Tales... from... daycaaaare! *spooky music*

In my center we have six "classroom levels". Infants, Twaddlers, Toddler 1, Toddler 2, Nursery and Pre-K. Around September of every year the kids who are old enough/at the proper level of development move up to the next classroom.

This means, in the infant room, if the child is walking unassisted for at least 10 steps(steadily) he or she is going to be moved to Twaddlers. We are starting the transitioning process with some of the infants who we expect will be moving up by September such as giving them sippy cups instead of bottles, having one long nap instead of several small ones, ect ect. Right now, every Friday we try to get the kids to drink from a sippy cup. We have three kids we are transitioning like this. Two of them are twins.

The mother of the twins is horrible to work with. Her son is already taking steps unassisted, though not many (at most two wobbly little steps) but its fully expected that by September he'll be stable and waddling along without a problem. Her daughter has just started to crawl.

She asks if we'd split the kids up. Well, we'd have to. We can't leave her son in the room if hes taking stable steps because we already have problems with him crawling all over the kids and trying to stand on top of them.

Well, this just wont do she says. I refuse to let my kids be separated. She launches into a tirade about how important it is that he son stays in the infant room. She goes on for 45 minutes, LOUDLY, about this. She wakes up some of the sleeping kids even.

They she looks at us, deadpan, and asks how she can hold back her son's progress walking. Seriously. She asks if she keeps him in his carseat all day if that will delay him... I REALLY hope she was joking when she looked at her daughter and said "Maybe you'll push your brother down some steps!"

We encourage parents with infants to come visit often to feed or play with the baby. Even grandparents are welcome to come visit. (In older classrooms this is more disturbing then helpful, but still welcome to visit) So the twin's mom visits often, but does absolutely nothing with her kids. If I'm feeding one child, my co-worker changing the diaper of another, and one of her kids bumps their head or starts fussing, she outright refuses to comfort them. She lays down on the playmants and texts.

"Its not MY job to pick him up right now."

If her twins are down for a nap (a tricky thing to do as both of them are micro nappers) she'll come to visit, sit around and bull with my co-worker for a while, then "kiss them goodbye". This usually wakes them up and they start screaming because someone woke them up. I've asked her a few times just to look in on them, maybe rub their back, but not pick them up and kiss them. Que a thirty minute rant about how she can do whatever she wants with her kids, which just upsets them more. They pull on her shirt and pants and she barks 'Get away from me and go cry somewhere else!" at them and walks away. I ask her, repeatedly, if she would enjoy being woken up from a nap only to get "Its not MY problem if I wake them up..."

*bashes head into wall*

[Catianna]

As a mother I want to know why this woman refuses to care for her own children. I understand that daycare can be a good thing if the parents work and to visit the little ones while on a break for lunch would be wonderful, but if my children are in daycare and I am visiting them I feel I should at the very least help with their care. I'm sorry that you have to deal with a mother like that. I would not have the calm quiet attitude needed to put up with her without doing something that I would get fired for.
I can only offer and this is my .

[Nurian]

Grrr....what an idiot. I feel bad for those kids. If you're not going to interact with your kids when they're awake then why the FK are you there?

[sevendaysky]

Events like this led to a new policy at my high school's daycare center. The school has a parenting program, I guess, where you learn about child development, etc. It's like a teacher-track set of classes - later on, the students work with the kids, learn how to fill out the "teacher paperwork" and stuff.

Anyway, the way the daycare is laid out, it's sort of like an L laid on its side. The dogleg of the L has the bathrooms and a play area. The long side has a corner for naps, a section of tables that's used for play and lunch, and a narrow galley kitchen. Then there's a little room that's wall to wall one-way glass. Next to that is the door into the daycare, and a reading area. If parents want to check on their kids, they can NOT come into the main daycare area. They are instead allowed into the room with the one-way glass, and can watch their child. It's also used to monitor the students and the actual daycare staff - just to make sure nobody does anything inappropriate.

When I was a student there, the instructor told us that the room and the hands-off policy were put in due to a situation like the one you described. Now the parents aren't allowed to have direct contact with their kids unless they're picking up/dropping off the kid. There have been a few complaints but the staff are Very Firm about this policy and they HAVE dropped children from the program due to problems with the parents. (It's in the CONTRACT that this will happen if you don't follow the rules...)

To the OP - I would start keeping a log of these disturbances, note the children's reactions to them, and go to your supervisor. CPS might be very interested in hearing about this woman's attitude toward her children.

[Kristev]

That woman's just plain disgusting. And call CPS. Any parent who threatens to let, or encourage, their daughter to push their son down the stairs to halt his development is parent who needs to be investigated.

[HawaiianShirts]

What idiot of a "mother" would deliberately attempt to delay her child's physical or psychological development?! Even if it was just trapping him in his carseat as she suggested (which might be bad for a baby's back if used for more than car trips anyway), that's just horrible!

I... Whew. This one really got my blood boiling. I don't know how you restrained yourself from doing something violent to her or whipping out the cell phone calling CPS, but I guess that's why you're the daycare provider instead of me.

Don't let her anywhere near my son.

[fireheart]

I'm with the others. Heck, don't even bother keeping a log. If there's an anonymous tip line set up for CPS, ring them and talk to them about it.

Seems like the mother thinks that because she popped out twins, that they'll develop at the same time. Wait until they hit puberty...usually girls start developing faster than guys.

[BuggedMei]

I'm with the others. Heck, don't even bother keeping a log. If there's an anonymous tip line set up for CPS, ring them and talk to them about it.

Seems like the mother thinks that because she popped out twins, that they'll develop at the same time. Wait until they hit puberty...usually girls start developing faster than guys.

I've been thinking about it and I spoke to a coworker about it, she swears that its just "talk" and she wont do anything but... argh.

I did mention to the mother that what happens when they are enrolled in school and are in separate classrooms, are you going to complain then? She answered, "Of course!"

[fireheart]

Ask her what happens once they hit puberty? Will they develop at the same time? (i.e. girl gets breasts before boy starts getting erections)

[FortuneCookie]

Are you able to refuse them service? I might bring it up with your boss before a parent does. If she is upsetting other children and making thing so difficult, it might be a better idea to ask her to go elsewhere.

I always felt bad when I had to pick up my daughter during nap time because it disturbed the bigger kids in the front room. Even if you're really quiet, the front door is not, lol.

[Mr Hero]

In my center we have six "classroom levels". Infants, Twaddlers...

And then there's the special class for the "mother." I call it "twatlers"

[BuggedMei]

And then there's the special class for the "mother. I call it "twatlers"

You owe me a new bubble tea... *wipes her tea off her monitor*

[sweetj82]

i go over to my babysitter whenever i get an hr lunch. if my lil man is sleeping i will neverever thing about waking him up.

if he is awake i love spending the time with him so i feed him,change diapers...etc.

[Xarlaxas]

Yeah, I'm definitely with everyone else on calling CPS, even though your co-worker says it's just "talk" if it isn't, then, well, those kids are in danger!

[Green_Fairy]

I've been thinking about it and I spoke to a coworker about it, she swears that its just "talk" and she wont do anything but... argh.

it doesn't matter if it's just talk. eventually, it probably won't be. the authorities need to be notified of this. you don't know what happens when the kids are at home. hell, she could already be keeping the boy in his carseat all day.