Why can't I drink at work? Its not like I'm on fryers anymore. (language)

[Whiskey]

Short, sweet and totally killing my day-off-buzz. Its only 3:30 here and I don't have meetings for my other job till 9. I could probably show up drunk to that anyways.

Me: Anti-Customer Service
C: The unholy. Or customer. Depends on how late it is.


So this guy has a habit of just pulling to the window to order his stupid fruit cup. 1.72 for like an ounce of processed sugar saturated "fruit." Its all this guy orders, ever. I'm in zero mood some days for a short/over drawer so sometimes I don't let people get away with lack of exact change/proper tender. Somedays I'll let two cents go. However, a couple days ago I was off three cents from a perfect drawer and it was off because I let some chick go at 1.01 instead of the full 1.04. I might be a little OCD about my drawer. Hey, at least its just a fruit cup and not a 45$ order. So it goes down, Armageddon-style.

Me: 14.08 please
C: I ordered a fruit cup!!!!!
Me: [thought: what? no one ordered a fruit cup.] Okay.. sorry about that *rings a new ticket* 1.72$
C: *hands me money, says nothing*
Me: *counts, cause I passed addition with an A+* You gave me 1.60 I need 12 cents please
C: Oh! Sorry *hands some change*
Me: Okay now I have 1.63, I need .09 cents please
C: Er. Okay here *hands nickel, two pennies*
Me: Okay.. I need two more cents.. its 1.72
C: OH MY GOD ITS TWO CENTS *hands me the two cents* WHERE IS YOUR MANAGER JESUS CHRIST I LEAVE A HUNDRED MILLION DOLLARS A DAY HERE AND YOU CANT SPOT ME TWO CENTS JESUS CHRIST RAHHHHHHHHHHHH
Me: ...yeah just a second *headset messages my team lead* Mr. Team Lead this man would like to speak to you, he's upset he has to pay all the money for his fruit cup.
Team Lead: Wha....t????

Team lead reassures him that the price of food is the price of food and sorry you have to pay full price for the food cause... its the price of the food! Really, dude? I couldn't give a shit that you put day shifts drawer over cause you left your change on that meal, if you ever did. My new franchise owner is a little picky about drawers being short/over and you aren't worth my job. If you don't have the cash to pay for your food, GET OUT AND GO BUY A CANTALOUPE AT THE GROCERY. Its like 98 cents or something. Theres a grocery store ACROSS THE STREET. Its not like he was surprised, he does this twice a week.


Okay, seriously, people are trying my patience. Everyone in the store (on swing/grave at least) knows I'm anti-customer service. Don't get me wrong. Legitimate complaints? I'll snap my spine in half trying to fix it and make everyone a happy customer. Food made wrong when you actually ordered it special? I'm sorry as fuck! Let me get that remade, would you like a soda? Saying you ordered 25$ in food and got a 1$ chicken sandwich instead? I see your con, son, get out of my drive thru. I hate split orders by the way. Don't do that.

Speaking of..


Me: HAYYYYY IM WHISKEY AND I DRINK ENTIRELY TOO LITTLE FOR THIS SHIT WHAT CAN I GET YOU?
C: Can I do a split order?
Me: *looks at screen, one order up, its not a likely rush time* sure
Grill: FFFFUUUUUUCKKKKKK YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
C: Can I get blahhhhhhhhhhhh.
Me: Total is x.xx
C: Okay, second order, can I get ffffffffffaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh.
Me: Okay total is x.xx, see you at the window!
C: Okay, THIRD ORDER I----
Me: I can only do two orders :|

I had someone ask if they could do five separate orders. No, motherfucker, not ever. They ordered 12$ in food. However, split orders usually go like this.

C: Can I do a split order?
Grill *headset* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Team Lead: *headset* FFFFFFUCKKKKKKKKK
Me: No.
C: BUT--
Me: We're entirely too busy.
C: BU---
Me: NO.

Then a four dollar order.


So last night was my first OFFICIAL grave shift. 10pm-6am. The girl who was doing it got herself fired, which was a whole story in and of itself, mostly because of me. So far everyone at the store who's had a problem with me has been fired. Not because of me, just coincidentally they lose their jobs shortly after. Its making me look.. weird. Its a running grave joke now that if I don't like you, then you'll promptly be fired because thats what (accidentally) happened. Turns out one got arrested for child abuse and the other is a stupid flake. Now I thinks some people are genuinely concerned about crossing me because, while not true, it does seem like everyone I don't like doesn't keep their jobs long.

Less coworker-conspiracy chat, more shitty customers. And form format!

Me: WOO ITS ALMOST GO HOME AND DRINK AWAY THE DIRTY FEELING I GET FROM PIMPING CUSTOMER SURVEYS TIME IM WHISKEY WHAT DO YOU WANT
C: can I get a chicken sandwich, two tacos, seven hamburgers.
Me: 20$ at the window!

Authors note: Its 4am. The POS just restarted, i counted a new drawer, dropped all my old 20s from the previous and the safe has been counted. You know whats about to happen.. its like having sex in a horror movie.. you just know..

C: *hands over $100*
Me: One second *headset* TL I need keys to break a hundred.
TL: I just sealed the safe drops, unless you can break it theres nothing available.
Me: *to customer* sorry, I can't break a hundred right now. Do you have anything smaller?
C: UGH! *grabs money, drives off*
Me: HAMBURGERS FOR EVERYONE!

Hamburgers for everyone, indeed.


and for a management gripe. Apparently theres a lead on the morning shift whos a huge bitch. I can relate, half my employees at my other job would classify me as the same. I might have a history with having issues with people disrespecting me. Theres a whole long list of bullshit in my life and I'm generally not receptive to people treating me improperly. Well I forgave her tone for a lot, because now i can relate until...

Me: *gets ready to clock out, punching in number*
Morning TL: HEY GIRL, PUT THIS IN THE DINING ROOM.
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8Kyi0WNg40
Grave TL: WHISKEY CLOCK OUT I GOT IT (and I'm pretty sure he was praying to whatever god I didn't lose my goddamn mind on this TL)
Me: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8Kyi0WNg40 *clocks out, walks off*

First of all, you decrepit old bitch (if we're being candid), I have a name tag on. It says Whiskey. "HEY WHISKEY" is appropriate. "HEY" is mildly appropriate. "Can you.." is even better because I'm your subordinate. While "can you" seems like a question, as a subordinate it is my job to comply. I will do so.

"Hey girl" is a whole other thing. Don't get me started.


Uplifting note: I'm in love with Bacon & Cheese Guy. I've posted about him here and there, but everytime I hear "curly fries with bacon & cheese" i'm like "haaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy." I wish he'd ask for my phone number instead of the 55 year old men working off a gallon of vodka with chicken sandwiches that tend to. I was actually letting a new guy (who is.. floundering because hes 19 and won't listen to ANYONE) work a drawer, when I heard bacon and cheese curly fries. So like I retard I saunter (yeah, saunter) up to drive and wave like a moron. He probably thinks i'm functionally retarded.

Crazy cat lady note: I let my cat out when I'm home to go roam and murder birds. I leave the sliding door open (im on the second story) so if I fall asleep he can (and does) scale the building and get in. Well, its 4am so I went out in my Super Cute Ducky Robe and made kissy noises. Nothing. Odd. I make more kissy noises. Nothing. I guess hes not coming in, whatever. Ten seconds later, at the door, MOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWEEEEEEOWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW WWWWWWW

Oh, there you are. I'm a cat lady who drinks too much. I am the best person. (edit: why this is funny? I heard him over Lady Gaga on full blast in my headphones.)

[underemployeed]

See with my personality I could never do fast food, I would be fired in a heart beat because well I know how bitchy people get about their morning coffee, screwing up a meal gets much worse from what I hear. Actually, Im rather glad the guy I told off when he started complaining his coffee wasn't ready, now respects me instead of running to my boss pissed. I ended up telling him, "Im sorry, I forgot to make your coffee but pleasing you isn't on my f#$@ing long list of shit to I must accomplish tonight before the boss arrives, Ill brew it right now if you have 5 minutes", he was late for work and didn't have time
Funny part is now we are on a first name basis.

[r2cagle]

I know that you were venting your painful experience, but you tell a good story.

'Hamburgers for everyone, indeed'

*walks away wiping laugh tears away*

[Racket_Man]

I just beat my head with a pizza box (gotta stop my brain cells from comitting suiside somehow) when I get an idiot on the phone who NEVER knows what to order or is taking a major Presidential Vote of those present in the background or someone thinks it is real CUTE to put a 3 yearold on the phone to place the order.

[Jester]

Commenting on the thread title:

I work in a bar. I like to drink. I can reasonably have a beer and be perfectly fine to do my job. And yet....

Smokers can take a hundred smoke breaks a day. Can I get a beer break, after stocking 14 cases of beer and sweating my ass off? Nooooo.....I can't.

Trust me, when it is hot and humid, and I am sweaty, a single cold one will not even phase me.

And there is not one single damn excuse for a smoke break that wouldn't apply equally well to me for a beer break. Not. One.
I deserve a beer break, damn it!

[Moirae]

I worked fast food for a year. You couldn't pay me enough to do it again. It was a nightmare. I so totally sympathize.

[BowserKoopa1]

Try working at McD's, 2 different ones. I worked the drive-thru often. My least favorite people are the moms who bring their little kids for Happy Meals. The problem is, they have 1 of the 2 toys that's already out for that week (this was back in the mid 1990's) and we would have 2 toys that go with the Happy Meals every week. And these people stuff their kids with our food several times a week, so of course they're going to have the same toys.
Needless to say, kid starts complaining that he/she wants a different toy, and then the parents give me a pleasant smile and ask me to waste time searching for another toy. So many times this happened, I so badly wanted to say, "We're not a toy store! So stop being cheap and go to the nearest toy store and let your kid pick out a toy and stop pestering us for a different toy!"

[Jester]

One thing I am very proud of is that I have never, not a single day in my life, worked for a fast food restaurant. Not. Bloody. Once.

And just reminding myself of that makes me smile every single time.

[Anakah]

I loved that youtube video! I laughed for like two mins straight!

[malmalthekiller]

The use of the dramatic chipmunk brought a tear to my eye. I too have done that very same move to managers making ridiculous requests to me, or yelling in my general direction.

[Android Kaeli]

I worked for two different fast food places for just over a year total, I will NEVER work for fast food again unless one of two things happen: A. I'm in a body bag, or B. I really, really, REALLY need a second job. ( and I'm not so sure about the second one )

It's not fun working at fast food, too many people get pissy if there's even a teeny, tiny thing wrong.

[jnd4rusty]

I have worked in the fast food industry since 1984, with about a four year break to work at a bakery, a convience store and a jewelry company. I chose the resturant business because I actually enjoy it. I really did not like any of the burger joints very much, they are almost run the same and everyone of them are so afraid of corporate that they become so damn uptight. I have had my share of sucky customers, sucky employees, and sucky management!! I still keep going back because, honestly, I enjoy the challenge! The place I work at now is absolutely the best resturant I have ever worked at, in fact I will be celebrating my 16 year anniversary on August 3rd. I am not the only one who has stayed with the business for many years, my boss has worked for them for 22 years, "A" (our crew trainer) has been with the company for 23 years, "D", the general manager, started when he was 15 and that was in 1971. There are approximately 24 employees who have worked at our location for two or more years and we have 37 employees at our location. My resturant is one of 4 in our city owned by the same family. I know that there are several within the other three stores who have worked for the company for more than four years also.

I get some sucky customers at my store but honestly we really don't have very many. Most of our customers have been coming to our establishment since 1969, when we first opened, in fact we have some hard core fans who come in more than once a day and up to six or seven times a week! Anyways, some fast food places are sucky to work at, mine is not, I actually look forward to work everyday. I do plan to leave the industry because it is extremely hard work and very physically demanding and my body can't take it much more as I am getting older, that is why I am working on a degree but I will have a tough time leaving because it has become like a second family to me and I have built some fantastic friendships through the job.

People think I am crazy for working the fast food business for so long but when you are treated right and paid well and the owners treat you like their own children, well it is kind of hard to leave that. Plus, it pays the bills!

[Kristev]

If it works for you, more power to you.

[Whiskey]

when you are treated right and paid well and the owners treat you like their own children, well it is kind of hard to leave that.

This is why no one stays in fast food. Management barely treats you human (see the paragraph about the morning TL not even referring to me by name), let alone like family. And, generally, you're not paid very well. My low rank job does pay the bills. As long as it does, I'll show up every day. If I was paid well and treated well, i wouldn't leave any job.

[jnd4rusty]

This is why no one stays in fast food. Management barely treats you human (see the paragraph about the morning TL not even referring to me by name), let alone like family. And, generally, you're not paid very well. My low rank job does pay the bills. As long as it does, I'll show up every day. If I was paid well and treated well, i wouldn't leave any job.

I agree that management in fast food can be less than perfect, most are young people, who are given a role of leadership and they don't know how to handle it. The posistion definately goes to their head and they think they need to rule with a iron fist instead of learning real management styles. I also have to agree that no matter where you work, you are going to find bad management, it is not reserved for fast food. It is amazing how many people get promoted to a management position and they suddenly turn to shit, they could have been the best employee in the company but as soon as they are given a title, their brain and performance turns upside down. I have witnessed this many times, and I have witnessed many people excel also, I guess it just depends on the person.

I am sorry you have bad management to deal with, hopefully they won't stay long.