The worst phone call I've ever recieved here

[Sheldonrs]

How do you continue working through the day when you get a call in the morning that starts with "Hello, my name is ____ _____. My 19 year old son and 15 year old daughter were killed in an accident in February..."

I remembered the names from the donations we had received and had googled them at the time. They died in a terrible car accident.

She was calling because some of her family members wanted to know how much money was donated in the childrens names because they are hoping to have enough donated to sponsor a whole wish.

I was shaking through the entire call and it took a little while to clear my head enough to come back to my desk after that.

[TelephoneAngel]

aww hug to you, that is incredibly difficult isn't it?

The worst we had was when a lady called to cancel her son's account because he had been killed in Afghanistan, she wanted to talk about him, and my coworker just let her and said never mind the call times. He was a hero and we googled him afterwards, I remember all us girls were crying listening to this phone call, but the coworker who took the call said that the lady herself was very composed.

[Magpie]

Yeah, not a cool call to take. I think I don't envy your your job anymore.

[tollbaby]

*hug* Sheldon. Calls like that suck.

[Victoria J]

A sad call for you - but probably not for her (at least compared to most things she's had to do as part of the practical arrangements). And how very nice that they took something that awful and did something nice for other families !

I do like the idea of donating money in people's memory. So much better than sad flowers slowly falling to bits. I recently helped a family member prepare her will ahead of an operation, and she started off all practical but got quite upset as she went on. The only part that cheered her up was when she mentioned to me that she didn't want flowers at her funeral when she died, and I suggested she ask people to donate to a charity instead. She spent quite a lot of time choosing her charity and it means a lot to her.

I've talked to people in some awful circumstances, and have found some of them to be the calmest people I've dealt with. I think the worse is someone who's daughter (adult, maybe early 20s) had been murdered, and she was asking about possible help with the funeral (there wasn't any). Very business like the whole time - you could tell she was in huge pain but she was dealing with the emotional stuff elsewhere (with people who cared for her hopefully) and didn't want to do that with me.

The worst is people are fine until you are nice. I recently had to advise my friend's neighbour following her giving birth to a baby who died a couple of hours later. It's horrible stuff to advise on (because some of the practical stuff is kind of heart breaking and the technicalities are kind of disturbing) without everything else. She couldn't cope with anyone being nice. She came back the next day with flowers and chocolates to "thank" me and I felt awful. It also reminded me of the most heart breaking enquiry I've had which was someone who wanted to know if they were "allowed" a funeral for a miscarried baby. (Of course ! you may or may not have to have one but if you want one to grieve of course).

Sorry. I'm depressing myself.

It's horrible sometimes, but I guess the point is there are a lot worse things you can do than make things even a tiny bit better for peoople going through something horrible. And in your case the woman's money also helps some other family going through something horrible.

Making the world a better place - it's not easy but I have to believe it's worth doing. (personally I wish there was less paperwork).

Victoria J

[Exaspera]

Ah, poor Sheldon. [[[[[[[HUGS}}}}}}}

But if you look at it in other ways, there are many blessings around.

[goldensummer]

The saddest conversation I've been witness to went something like this:

Associate: "Would you like to purchase the one year warranty on these child's glasses you're buying?"

Mom looking at her sweet kind 4 year old "No, unfortunately we won't need that; he's terminal."

The young lady working with the mother had to leave the floor.

[Kristev]

I wish something could stop all these tragedies and heartbreaks.

[boringscreenname]

By far the worst part of my job is having to go into a deceased patient's room, assist with transferring them to a gurney and then wheeling them down to the morgue. Fortunately it doesn't happen often, but I still hate when it does.

[Whiskey]

The saddest conversation I've been witness to went something like this:

Associate: "Would you like to purchase the one year warranty on these child's glasses you're buying?"

Mom looking at her sweet kind 4 year old "No, unfortunately we won't need that; he's terminal."

The young lady working with the mother had to leave the floor.

I couldn't handle that either.

[Seshat]

It's worth it.

I've helped several people through grief, and it really does make a difference to their day when someone cares enough to try to help smooth the bumps in life.

Focus on helping them, not so much on their pain, and it'll help you get through it. Be sympathetic, but not empathetic - support them, don't take the pain on yourself.

What they need from their close friends is permission to mourn and safe places to do it. But what they need from you as a CSR is help getting whatever practical thing done, and your patience with their grief-induced brain-farts.

That said - yeah, sad stories can be awful.

[Peppergirl]

Damn.

This made me tear up...and I *never* do that.

I'm so sorry, Sheldon. What an awful call, but what a wonderful family for doing that.

Stories like this make me feel like a crappy mom when I get pissed at my boys for stupid stuff.

[MoonChild2007]

Those calls are hard cause sometimes the CSR doesn't know what to say. Although sometimes people use those "sad stories" to get what they want.

[BlaqueKatt]

I wish something could stop all these tragedies and heartbreaks.

I have an answer for that but it's best suited for fratchhing....I'll start that thread later....