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Run, Fetch, Carry! Good Girl!

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  • Run, Fetch, Carry! Good Girl!

    *sigh*

    Reason #15 that I hate the "Healthiness +" card: It creates more problems than it solves.

    Woman in a neckbrace comes up and asks if I can help her with a problem. Wonders why she paid x amount extra for food, whines that she hasn't had foodstamp money for 4 days and then pulls out a card that Aid of Rite is doing away with in September. "Will this work?" I tell her, you have to upgrade to "Healthiness +", that card is being done away with in September. I hand her a form, tell her I'll see if I can fix it later and she goes in pharmacy to fill it out. In the meantime, I've got customers coming out from Timbuktu to shop so I'm busy as hell. When it's her turn again, she's magically lost the form. I send her another one and she goes off to a quiet counter to fill it out again. another rush of people. Neckbrace cuts in to yell at me "Hey! Aren't you gonna help me? I know you're busy!"

    "I'll be there in a minute!"

    "That's a GOOD GIRL!" Said in the exact tone that I would use to talk to my dogs.

    When I finally get to her, Neckbrace has got a list of things that were "wrong". That list is about half the mile long receipt. In order to fix anything, I'll need to hunt down everything on that list, haul it up, do a return on each individual item, scan and activate the "Healthiness +" card, re-ring every item again, then put the money back onto the card. So like an idiot I go to see if I can. I can't. "Marshwell House" coffee is out of stock, Aid of Rite brand lemon and vanilla extract are out of stock, the Aid of Rite brand spices are out of stock and to top it off, she brought brand name "Grrrrrrrrr-eat! Flakes" (think of that tiger mascot if you don't get it?) instead of the generic flakes that were on sale. So as I'm wondering what I'm supposed to do, Manager S1 comes up and asks me what's wrong, I fill her in. So does cashier A.

    "Well she should have brought the stuff that she wanted to return," S1 says. "None of us have time to hunt down and fix everything individually. Why didn't she bring it in 4 days ago when she noticed the problem?"

    "Plus foodstamp card money takes a few days to show up," A says.

    S1 comes up and finds that Neckbrace...has vanished! Poof! Apparently she was using the bathroom at gas station across the street. When she comes back, S1 tells her that she needs to bring the stuff in for a return. Neckbrace says it wasn't even her card, it was her boyfriend's, but she has her card. S1 tells her she needs to bring both boyfriend and card.

    Cue Neckbrace cussing us out, cussing me out, cussing Aid of Rite out and complaining that we didn't help her.

    Whenever someone tells me "GOOD GIRL!" my instant reaction is to bark. I am not a dog, I have a nametag, but no collar and no visible tail.
    Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.-Winston Churchill

  • #2
    Quoth ralerin View Post

    Whenever someone tells me "GOOD GIRL!" my instant reaction is to bark. I am not a dog, I have a nametag, but no collar and no visible tail.
    Me, I'd probably drop my drawers, lift my leg and....
    Knowledge is power. Power corrupts. Study hard. Be evil.

    "I never said I wasn't a horrible person."--Me, almost daily

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    • #3
      Wow. If only we could ban customers who do stuff like that.

      Comment


      • #4
        Ooooooh, I HATE the dog treatment! Somebody tried to get my attention once by doing the "dog whistle". KILL! FUCK OFF! HATE! DIIIIIIEEEEE! (Virtual chocolate for the first one to get this reference)
        Steven Slater ROCKS! So does James Jones!

        The world is an asshole contest...and EVERYONE'S A WINNER!

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        • #5
          "no visible tail"
          "no visible tail"
          Oh I like you. ;-3


          The last time a customer spoke to me in that tone of voice, I gave it right back to them while conducting perfect business. Worked just fine.
          SC: "Are you new or something?"
          Me: "Yes. Your planet is very backwards I hope you realize."

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          • #6
            Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
            Me, I'd probably drop my drawers, lift my leg and....


            Me? I bark at my managers.

            "Woof."

            Perhaps I'll try Irv's technique next time and see what happens.
            Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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            • #7
              I always would ignore the people who did the 'dog tone' with me... pissed a lot of customers off, but made them speak to me like a human being. Of course... a human being they were mad at... but still.
              "I'm not smiling because I'm happy. I'm smiling because every time I blink your head explodes!"
              -Red

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              • #8
                Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                Me, I'd probably drop my drawers, lift my leg and....
                P. Freleigh?

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                • #9
                  Quoth ShadowTiger View Post
                  "no visible tail"
                  "no visible tail"
                  Oh I like you. ;-3.
                  Heehee, thanks. I only did it to stop someone from going, "Hey you have a tail, it's called the coccyx!" :P

                  Unless you mean that demon's tail growing from my behind? >_>

                  Quoth DGoddessChardonnay View Post

                  Me? I bark at my managers.

                  "Woof."

                  Perhaps I'll try Irv's technique next time and see what happens.
                  Myeh, I've done variations on both (well not pulling down my pants but putting on a constipated face and pretending to poo when I was told I wasn't allowed to visit the restroom, my response was "Ok! Then I'll do it here!"). Cashier K gives me hell for it; but then she always gives everyone hell.
                  Success is not final, failure is not fatal: It is the courage to continue that counts.-Winston Churchill

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                  • #10
                    Quoth Irving Patrick Freleigh View Post
                    Me, I'd probably drop my drawers, lift my leg and....
                    Works best if you have a shotgun socketed under their chin a la "Deliverance".
                    I am not an a**hole. I am a hemorrhoid. I irritate a**holes!
                    Procrastination: Forward planning to insure there is something to do tomorrow.
                    Derails threads faster than a pocket nuke.

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                    • #11
                      Quoth dalesys View Post
                      Works best if you have a shotgun socketed under their chin a la "Deliverance".
                      Don't forget to squeal like a pig.
                      Human Resources - the adult version of "I'm telling Mom." - Agent Anthony "Tony" DiNozzo (NCIS)

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                      • #12
                        Dude - I would TOTALLY have barked.

                        Im serious. Then again, I'd probably not have a job - but I know I would have barked.
                        "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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                        • #13
                          Quoth Peppergirl View Post
                          Dude - I would TOTALLY have barked.

                          Im serious. Then again, I'd probably not have a job - but I know I would have barked.
                          I'm almost barked at a SC who did that. I opened my mouth and quietly said "w" before I stopped myself.

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                          • #14
                            Quoth mattm04 View Post
                            I'm almost barked at a SC who did that. I opened my mouth and quietly said "w" before I stopped myself.
                            I'm reasonably certain I actually did this back in my hard-partying, heavy drinking days.

                            But I bartended and waited tables a bit back then, for privately owned places. I could pretty much bark or snarl at anyone who gave me shit.

                            Ah, the good ol' days
                            "So, if you wanna put places like that outta business, just stop being so rock-chewingly stupid." ~ Raudf, 9/19/13

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                            • #15
                              Quoth ShadowTiger View Post
                              "no visible tail"
                              "no visible tail"
                              Oh I like you. ;-3
                              You beat me to it.
                              Thou shalt not take the name of thy goddess Whiskey in vain.

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