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So I work in a company that deals with selling gas contracts for various gas suppliers (a gas brokership), I'm in admin, not the call centres, but occasionally take escalated complaints.
Note: yes my company does cold calling, yes they sell people gas over the phone and set up commercial gas contracts with no cooling off period verbally with a verbal signature, it is entirely legal here, whether it is morally or ethically correct is nothing to do with the suck, so take it to fratching.
So SC phones in, and starts complaining about how we haven't installed her new meter yet, receptionist finds the file and checks and there is no clause at all that says she needs a new meter, in fact it shows that the customer confirmed that her gas meter was working fine and gave us the serial number for it. So the receptionist passes her to me.
I get the file and look at it while the customer explains (ok, rants, I’m giving her too much credit) that she needs her new meter today. I notice that we contacted her this Tuesday and set up a new gas contract for her with Gas company x the same day over the phone as part of a verbal contract. Now one thing about the UK gas distribution network, any change of supplier takes approx 4 weeks, and it’s been less than 4 days.
So I ask the customer if they remember going through the contract script with our sales team, she says that she remembers it, so I read out the point of it in which it says that it can take up to 4 weeks. Then she says that she wasn’t told that, she was told her meter was going to be replaced on Thursday. Now the file I have makes no mention of this so I tell her such and say that if she wants I can check the call recording itself for her (note: we check all calls that result in a contract as a matter of course before we send them to the suppliers, who then check them again at their end and inform us of any problems that are made). I go away, listen to the call, and this is the only reference I can find to what she’s talking about:
SC: and if there is anything wrong with the meter you can send someone or fix or replace it?
Sales: Not us personally, but company x are offering a new meter upgrade with one of their (insert name of fancy new meter here), which they will contact you about within 3 working days of your supply going live with them.
SC: ok, that sounds great
Sales – continues with script
Now I know that means that after 4 weeks the supply will go live and then 3 days later company x will post them a brochure about (fancy new meter) which the customer can pay an amount for (or ignore entirely) and then get installed within a month of placing your order. But in SC speak that says “I personally am going to come to your house and put in a new fancy meter 100% free of charge tomorrow, oh and have a free pen with our logo on!”. I also quickly checked the parts of the script where she gave us the serial number of her existing gas meter and confirmed it was working with no issues as I had a hunch
So I call the customer back, explain what the call says and what that means in as nice a way as possible. She freaks out and says that she really needs her new meter. I go with my hunch and the following occurs:
Me: So if you don’t mind me asking, why is it that you need a new meter as you confirmed on the call that yours was working and it looks like its only a couple of years old anyway?
SC: Cos its leaking! The whole place has stunk of gas since Tuesday when you’re people called to fix it, and now you’re saying it will take mon…
Me (Interrupting) You’ve got a gas leak?
SC: yes,
Me: you need to call 0800 111 999 now. Open all the doors and windows and turn your gas off at the meter, ensure no naked flames are around and do it NOW, call us back when that has been resolved, good bye (hangs up)
2 mins later the phone starts ringing, I pick it up and guess who it is? Yep:
SC: You hung up on me!
Me: You’re property is in danger due to the gas leak, turn the gas off at the meter, open all doors and windows, stay a safe distance from the building and call the gas emergency hotline, do you need the number again?
SC: I’m not calling them I don’t know who they are.
Me: They are the national gas emergency helpline; they will get a technician out within an hour to stop the leak.
SC: But I want to know when you’re putting in a new meter!
Me: We can’t touch the gas at all until you’ve called that number and had the gas leak fixed, good bye.
1 minute later the receptionist tells me she’s on the phone again, I tell the secretary to ask if she’s phoned them, she hasn’t. I tell the receptionist to inform her that we don't deal with gas leaks and to call that number.
Me: Hello? National gas emergency helpline? Yes I’d like to report a gas leak, I was walking past (address) and there was a strong smell of gas coming from the windows, can you send someone over?
Some days I need rescuing from the numpty’s
Note: yes my company does cold calling, yes they sell people gas over the phone and set up commercial gas contracts with no cooling off period verbally with a verbal signature, it is entirely legal here, whether it is morally or ethically correct is nothing to do with the suck, so take it to fratching.
So SC phones in, and starts complaining about how we haven't installed her new meter yet, receptionist finds the file and checks and there is no clause at all that says she needs a new meter, in fact it shows that the customer confirmed that her gas meter was working fine and gave us the serial number for it. So the receptionist passes her to me.
I get the file and look at it while the customer explains (ok, rants, I’m giving her too much credit) that she needs her new meter today. I notice that we contacted her this Tuesday and set up a new gas contract for her with Gas company x the same day over the phone as part of a verbal contract. Now one thing about the UK gas distribution network, any change of supplier takes approx 4 weeks, and it’s been less than 4 days.
So I ask the customer if they remember going through the contract script with our sales team, she says that she remembers it, so I read out the point of it in which it says that it can take up to 4 weeks. Then she says that she wasn’t told that, she was told her meter was going to be replaced on Thursday. Now the file I have makes no mention of this so I tell her such and say that if she wants I can check the call recording itself for her (note: we check all calls that result in a contract as a matter of course before we send them to the suppliers, who then check them again at their end and inform us of any problems that are made). I go away, listen to the call, and this is the only reference I can find to what she’s talking about:
SC: and if there is anything wrong with the meter you can send someone or fix or replace it?
Sales: Not us personally, but company x are offering a new meter upgrade with one of their (insert name of fancy new meter here), which they will contact you about within 3 working days of your supply going live with them.
SC: ok, that sounds great
Sales – continues with script
Now I know that means that after 4 weeks the supply will go live and then 3 days later company x will post them a brochure about (fancy new meter) which the customer can pay an amount for (or ignore entirely) and then get installed within a month of placing your order. But in SC speak that says “I personally am going to come to your house and put in a new fancy meter 100% free of charge tomorrow, oh and have a free pen with our logo on!”. I also quickly checked the parts of the script where she gave us the serial number of her existing gas meter and confirmed it was working with no issues as I had a hunch
So I call the customer back, explain what the call says and what that means in as nice a way as possible. She freaks out and says that she really needs her new meter. I go with my hunch and the following occurs:
Me: So if you don’t mind me asking, why is it that you need a new meter as you confirmed on the call that yours was working and it looks like its only a couple of years old anyway?
SC: Cos its leaking! The whole place has stunk of gas since Tuesday when you’re people called to fix it, and now you’re saying it will take mon…
Me (Interrupting) You’ve got a gas leak?
SC: yes,
Me: you need to call 0800 111 999 now. Open all the doors and windows and turn your gas off at the meter, ensure no naked flames are around and do it NOW, call us back when that has been resolved, good bye (hangs up)
2 mins later the phone starts ringing, I pick it up and guess who it is? Yep:
SC: You hung up on me!
Me: You’re property is in danger due to the gas leak, turn the gas off at the meter, open all doors and windows, stay a safe distance from the building and call the gas emergency hotline, do you need the number again?
SC: I’m not calling them I don’t know who they are.
Me: They are the national gas emergency helpline; they will get a technician out within an hour to stop the leak.
SC: But I want to know when you’re putting in a new meter!
Me: We can’t touch the gas at all until you’ve called that number and had the gas leak fixed, good bye.
1 minute later the receptionist tells me she’s on the phone again, I tell the secretary to ask if she’s phoned them, she hasn’t. I tell the receptionist to inform her that we don't deal with gas leaks and to call that number.
Me: Hello? National gas emergency helpline? Yes I’d like to report a gas leak, I was walking past (address) and there was a strong smell of gas coming from the windows, can you send someone over?
Some days I need rescuing from the numpty’s
*hands the sucktomer a lighter* now go play! 
He is my Black Dragon (and yes, a good one) strong, protective, the guardian. I am his Silver Dragon, always by his side, shining for him, cherishing him.
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