Hope your Comfy..

[NappingZombie]

This story is about a year old.. but I have never forgotten it.. In my darkest hours, I often reflect on this tale of a sucky customer.. to remind myself, that yes.. people really do need to occasionally get an enema to remove whatever substance has logged itself so far up their bowels.. that they feel the need to make others suffer.

It was a warm spring day..
I had just started my new job as a coach at a major cable company.
My job was simple, help my employees work thru difficult calls, and difficult customers, traing and support them. Occasionaly help them by taking an escalated call if need be.

It was around 10pm.. when Ms. Medusa called in.
Ms. Medusa was a customer of ours for 2 years. She had recently been put into a new 3 product promotion, which, considering she was a current customer and not a brand new one, was actually pretty decent.
Ms. Medusa was a web surfer...

Ms. Medusa discovered one day recently while surfing the web, that our company offered new customer promotions online.. but surprise.. when she tried to sign up for it online.. it was rejected. As Ms. Medusa.. was not a new customer.

The rules all clearly stated on the website that she was not eligible.. but in her mind that meant..

"Let me talk to your supervisor"

And here is where i come in...

(Remember.. brand new)

"Hello Ms. Medusa, how may I help you"

"I think its an unfair and malicious practice that you @#$% cable.. offers these deals to new customers and not to current ones.. are you trying to push us away?"

"Not at all maam, I notice we just recently put you into a new discount, and your only paying 10 dollars more then the one you see online, im sure you understant that we do lower cost bundles to entice customers, as every other company on the planet does"

"Thats ridiculous.. and makes no sense.. do I need to call the attorney General? This is an obvious bait and switch"

"I assure you maam.. this is not a bait and switch.. your not locked into a contract"

"Well.. heres whats going to happen, your going to give me that discount."

"Im sorry maam your not eligible for it"

"I dont care, your going to give me that discount."

"But maam, your not eligible and our system wont even allow us to put it on because of that"

"Did you hear me? Are you deaf? Your going to give me that discount..."

"Im sorry I cant"

"Ok .. heres how this is going to work. Its my day off.. Im sitting in my lounge chair.. I have a glass of ice t... im comfy.. and I hope you are.. because we are going to be sitting on this phone for the whole day, until you give me that discount... AND YOU BETTER NOT EVEN THINK OF HANGING UP ON ME."

"please hold"

So.. at this point.. I went to another supervisor for help, who apparently had their head up their $#%# because they were absolutely no help what so ever.. after an Hour.. AN HOUR.. of being on the phone with her.. me and an agent figured out a way to trick the system into giving her the disocunt..

Did she say thank you..

Nope..

Did I learn something..

Yep..

Customers suck..

[Kristev]

Yes they do. I'm sorry you had to deal with that . . . now don't use the word witch. Witches are nice people. And we can watch the television with mirrors. Go ahead and unwind. That's what the site is here for.

[Marmalady]

"Ok .. heres how this is going to work. Its my day off.. Im sitting in my lounge chair.. I have a glass of ice t... im comfy.. and I hope you are.. because we are going to be sitting on this phone for the whole day, until you give me that discount... AND YOU BETTER NOT EVEN THINK OF HANGING UP ON ME."

Oh, that reminds me of something that happened when I was in the car parking division.....

Young 20's-ish man comes in, wants a residents parking permit. He has none of the documents required (proof of residency, proof of ownership of vehicle). All he has is an address and car registration number written on a dirty scrap of paper.
J (who really didn't give a ****) was on counter duty.

J: I'm sorry, we can't give you a permit without (lists proofs we need).
SC: What do you mean, you can't? That's where I'm living, and that's my car number!
J: We need official documents, we're not allowed to issue permits without them.
SC: Well I'm not leaving this office until I get a permit!
J: Okay sir, would you like to take a seat then?
SC: Oh...! so you're going to do one for me then?
J: No but you're going to have a very long wait so you might as well make yourself comfortable.

[tropicsgoddess]

Ugh..people really do suck sometimes.

[MelodiousBubbles]

"Please hold..." *presses hold, walks away from phone*

[emax4]

after an Hour.. AN HOUR.. of being on the phone with her.. me and an agent figured out a way to trick the system into giving her the discount..

If it's that easy, there's no reason you can't add more channels that she won't notice, and therefore give leverage to that discount so that she still pays what she did before she called.

Change the information on the account so that it only goes to a supervisor, or keep adding notes every so often that says "See (rep ID #) before making changes.

[MoonCat]

These are the people that get "accidentally" disconnected. Or should be.

[Geek King]

J: No but you're going to have a very long wait so you might as well make yourself comfortable.

I like J already. Sounds like something I'd do (which is why they make me work with computers ). In fact, he'd likely fit right in with my local gaming group.

[nuthing12]

You should have said "That's okay, I'm getting paid to stay on the phone regardless of the outcome"

[Skeksin]

"Sure! I'll get that started right away! Now first we have to put in a disconnect order for you. Once the services have been removed you may call or register online for our services and we will have that discount in place for you!"

[chainedbarista]

"Thats ridiculous.. and makes no sense.. do I need to call the attorney General? This is an obvious bait and switch"

why is it that the people who frequently use this phrase truly have little understanding of what it means? she needs that enema, stat.

i agree with kristev; i am not mean, unless provoked, then i will beat you with my broom.

These are the people that get "accidentally" disconnected. Or should be.

she already has a disconnection with reality; i don't want any more disconnections on her part...oh wait, the phone, ok, yah, that's doable.

[Stryker One]

Rewarding the SC

So, in the end, they got what they wanted. And you reinforced the SCs belief that if they bitch enough, they'll get what they want. Great...

[CrazedClerkthe2nd]

So, in the end, they got what they wanted. And you reinforced the SCs belief that if they bitch enough, they'll get what they want. Great...

My thoughts too. I would have called her on the bluff. I've yet to meet an SC that I can't outlast.

[Sonoma]

Napping Zombie, I think I talked to tht same person today. Now, she did have a point, but in my field, we have policies & regulations that cannot be modified. She had submitted an application, but there was a backlog in processing. It was completed a month later, which, I agree, is slow. But, the plan was in effect for the month she would have started, based on when she filled out the application. She thought she was paying for July on her first payment, but it was actually for June. If she would have looked at the invoice, it clearly states June. So, she's been a month behind. She demanded a change to start the plan this month, but she's about 5-6 weeks past the window she had to do that.

She finally resorted to "You didn't hear me. I don't care what you're going to request. I'm going to tell you what you're going to do".

Here's the facts I had to work with:

We sent her the bill in June.
We sent her a 'welcome' letter in July.
She didn't complain about it until the end of August.

I tried every resource I had available to make the change she demanded, but she's just too late in notifying us. She then demanded to speak to my supervisor. My supervisor is the most easygoing person I've ever worked for, but this woman had her absolutely speechless. Anytime she offered to see what she could do to help this person, this lady launched into a tirade about how we weren't going to do anything at all for her. She was so rude, I apologized to my boss for transfering her.

She completely ignored everything we've sent her since June, and is now refusing any options other than the one she wants. Never mind the fact that she's well outside of any window she has, we are going to do what she demands....or so she believes.

Sorry for the length, not trying to threadjack, but when you posted about Medusa telling you what you were going to do for her, and she wouldn't accept any alternatives, it hit a nerve.

[Whiskey]

So, in the end, they got what they wanted. And you reinforced the SCs belief that if they bitch enough, they'll get what they want. Great...

I was waiting for someone else to say it. qft