We're not CSI!

[Astrokitty]

Let me preface this story by saying that I love forensics - both the science field and the television shows. I would work in forensics if I could afford the college. (Already paying off one worthless degree).

I was back in the trace lab, scavenging for packing material, when I noticed our normally calm, cool biologist on the phone becoming a bit agitated. She almost yelled on the phone: "We're not CSI!" before the customer hung up.

Turns out an SC had been complaining about their 4-week backlog of mercury tests. (Equipment failures). She tried to explain how they were working as fast as they could, but the SC countered with this gem:

"I don't understand. On CSI, they just put a few drops in a computer and it's done!"

He apparently didn't understand the concept of TV acting vs real science. Not to mention the background tests that must be performed, standardization, calibration, etc. Oh, if only we had their budget - maybe the company wouldn't buy office furniture at garage sales! *rubs her knee*

The real kicker? This customer had an engineering degree!

[ditchdj]

What's even sadder is that it happens so often it has a name to it:

"The CSI Effect"

http://www.usnews.com/usnews/culture...0425/25csi.htm

"On TV, it's all slam-dunk evidence and quick convictions. Now juries expect the same thing--and that's a big problem"

[bainsidhe]

Everyone in your building is drop-dead gorgeous though, right? RIGHT?

[bankworking]

When I was up for jury duty at one point, the lawyer made SEVERAL points in his opening speech (to the jurors, during jury selection) that pointed out that a real case was nothing like what you see on tv.

[the lawsmeister]

A buddy of mine did forensics at uni.
When he was starting out a large portion of the first year students were there "because I really like the X-files"
by the time he was doing his honours and teaching first year pracs on the side a lot of them were there "because I really like CSI"
Not surprisingly most people from both of these groups dropped out before the end of first semester

[csquared]

I saw a special on TV about CSI. All the equipment on that show is real. Too bad most major city crime labs don't have all that equipment.

One of the points that the show covered was the "instant results." They went though all the equipment and explained how many hours, and sometime days, it takes to run the tests. CSI analyses the forensics in hours while in the real world, it takes weeks.

[Kristev]

That's right. Nothing happens quickly unless it's bad. And in courts, swift justice equals injustice. Little better than a return to mob lynchings. Good thing appeals don't give people a second chance to talk and testify. Appeals focus only on how a case played out, on process, not facts.

[Antisocial_Worker]

Then there's the little problem of CSI Miami... once you notice it, you can't un-notice it. The characters wear the same outfits from the beginning of the episode to the end. This means that either all the crimes are occurring at the ass crack of dawn, or else the characters are wearing the same clothes for days at a time. In the heat and humidity of Miami, this would also mean that the characters would be giving off a stench that could warp linoleum.

And then there's the little problem that apparently all Miami crimes happen to rich white people. And the problem that the criminals hide their crimes with ludicrous conspiracies and commit their crimes with Rube Goldberg-esque devices such as a robot gun mounted on the front of a luxury automobile.

Frankly, once CSI Miami adopted "style over substance" as their mantra, I stopped watching the entire triplet of shows.

[C. Cecil Ivanish]

Then there's the little problem of CSI Miami...

...besides the lack of interesting storylines and of a charismatic and/or interesting character, you mean? I LOVE Vegas and NY, but am absolutely unable to stand Miami.

[NateTheChops]

The "Consultant to the Cops" style shows are getting interesting. The Mentalist, Lie To Me and Castle for example, though I honestly doubt a consultant would be there on every single case as no police department has the budget to have outside help there twenty-four seven. (You could argue that time passes between each episode and the Lightman Group doesn't always work with police, but still...)

I guess what people fail to realize about TV is that unless there's a two part episode, all of that crap has to fit within the space of an hour.

[MoonCat]

What??? You mean TV is not real??

It's sad. News reports about a death will often state that it will be weeks before the autopsy results are known. But all anybody remembers is that a character on a TV show got instant results.

If you want reality, watch "Cops" or your local news. Even those are edited, but at least nobody is solving crimes in 60 minutes (well, less, really, once you subtract all the commercials!)

[Kristev]

Even the court shows are edited. There's a lot more said in each case than the general average of 10-15 minutes that you see. They edit out a lot of statements that don't have anything to do with the case.

[C. Cecil Ivanish]

ARE YOU SAYING THAT JUDGE JUDY CAN BE A B****H FOR LONGER?

[ShinyGreenApple]

Just one of the many reasons I dislike the overlarge number of CSI type shows on right now. Blah.

[Chrismor]

ARE YOU SAYING THAT JUDGE JUDY CAN BE A B****H FOR LONGER?

That's what we need. The complete, uncut versions of Judge Judy.

C.