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So a bunch of short stories from when I delivered for Daddy Jake's a few years ago:
You bastard
This happened after I first started, went to a dorm (was in a college town) to deliver a pizza. It's evening and the lighting isn't the best, but the guy meets me, drops a few dollars and coins into my hands and books it. I knew right then, and from what he dropped into my hand, that something wasn't right.
Three dollars, a quarter and two pesos.
Flippin' pesos. I got screwed.
When I got back to the store, the manager asked why I didn't stop him. Uh, it was dark and I didn't get a good look at his face maybe? So of course had to pay for it out of my tips for the night.
I'll save you!
Once during the winter I was on a delivery and cut through an alley in a residential area to get where I needed to go (not dangerous ones, just ones that have been there since the city was founded, very common shortcuts). As I'm driving I look to my right and see what looks like a small child face-down in the snow, not moving.
So I slam on the brakes, get out, and rush to the child. . .
To find that it's a large Shrek doll some kid left in the snow.
Sure startled me at first!
Watch it!
This being a college town, every weekend when school is in session this place turns into the orgy scene from The Ten Commandments. I'm driving down a street near downtown when a wooden board drops onto my hood!
I hit the brakes and get out to find a guy on a balcony who had been throwing debris onto the road because he thought it was funny. I yelled at him that he almost hit my windshield and he apologized and begged me not to call the cops. Well, there was no damage and I had things to do so I told him to cut it out and went on my way.
Waahhhh. . .
As the only female delivery driver on the fleet for the most part, I missed out on opportunities the others took advantage of, even though it was against the rules: playing taxi.
For some reason, drunk kids will pay a driver more than a cab to take them somewhere, often not very far. Thus it wasn't a huge surprise when a guy approached my car at a stoplight asking if I'd take him and his buddies somewhere for $100. He didn't like when I told him no though, as being the owner of a vagina puts me at certain disadvantages and I'm not about to let a bunch of drunk college guys into my car.
His oh-so-reasoned response: "That's more money than you would make all night." And then as he passed my car he smacked the hood in a minor tantrum.
Boo hoo.
XYZ
So I deliver to an apartment complex where this guy (drunk, naturally) is waiting. He's taking his sweet, intoxicated time counting out the payment, when I happen to look down and notice the zipper on his shorts is down.
"Um, ah, sir, your uh. . ." *Points*
Drunk: "Oh, oops! I'm sorry, I'm drunk." *Zips up*
Customer's girlfriend to the rescue!
Again, during the winter, I was making a deliver to the sticks (a little ways out of town). The weather sucked. It was snowing, blowing, windy. . . I almost went off the road a couple of times, but I got there in a good amount of time. It's a little trailer out damn near in the middle of nowhere, but it was a college-age couple. I tell him his total, and he hands me cash.
For the exact amount.
I drove through all that crap to get screwed.
But wait! His girlfriend pipes up:
"Aren't you going to tip her?"
The guy grudgingly tips me a couple bucks. Cheap bastard.
I hope you all enjoyed that!
You bastard
This happened after I first started, went to a dorm (was in a college town) to deliver a pizza. It's evening and the lighting isn't the best, but the guy meets me, drops a few dollars and coins into my hands and books it. I knew right then, and from what he dropped into my hand, that something wasn't right.
Three dollars, a quarter and two pesos.
Flippin' pesos. I got screwed.
When I got back to the store, the manager asked why I didn't stop him. Uh, it was dark and I didn't get a good look at his face maybe? So of course had to pay for it out of my tips for the night.
I'll save you!
Once during the winter I was on a delivery and cut through an alley in a residential area to get where I needed to go (not dangerous ones, just ones that have been there since the city was founded, very common shortcuts). As I'm driving I look to my right and see what looks like a small child face-down in the snow, not moving.
So I slam on the brakes, get out, and rush to the child. . .
To find that it's a large Shrek doll some kid left in the snow.
Sure startled me at first!Watch it!
This being a college town, every weekend when school is in session this place turns into the orgy scene from The Ten Commandments. I'm driving down a street near downtown when a wooden board drops onto my hood!
I hit the brakes and get out to find a guy on a balcony who had been throwing debris onto the road because he thought it was funny. I yelled at him that he almost hit my windshield and he apologized and begged me not to call the cops. Well, there was no damage and I had things to do so I told him to cut it out and went on my way.
Waahhhh. . .
As the only female delivery driver on the fleet for the most part, I missed out on opportunities the others took advantage of, even though it was against the rules: playing taxi.
For some reason, drunk kids will pay a driver more than a cab to take them somewhere, often not very far. Thus it wasn't a huge surprise when a guy approached my car at a stoplight asking if I'd take him and his buddies somewhere for $100. He didn't like when I told him no though, as being the owner of a vagina puts me at certain disadvantages and I'm not about to let a bunch of drunk college guys into my car.
His oh-so-reasoned response: "That's more money than you would make all night." And then as he passed my car he smacked the hood in a minor tantrum.
Boo hoo.
XYZ
So I deliver to an apartment complex where this guy (drunk, naturally) is waiting. He's taking his sweet, intoxicated time counting out the payment, when I happen to look down and notice the zipper on his shorts is down.
"Um, ah, sir, your uh. . ." *Points*
Drunk: "Oh, oops! I'm sorry, I'm drunk." *Zips up*
Customer's girlfriend to the rescue!
Again, during the winter, I was making a deliver to the sticks (a little ways out of town). The weather sucked. It was snowing, blowing, windy. . . I almost went off the road a couple of times, but I got there in a good amount of time. It's a little trailer out damn near in the middle of nowhere, but it was a college-age couple. I tell him his total, and he hands me cash.
For the exact amount.
I drove through all that crap to get screwed.But wait! His girlfriend pipes up:
"Aren't you going to tip her?"
The guy grudgingly tips me a couple bucks. Cheap bastard.
I hope you all enjoyed that!
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